Online Dating

Lavalife is in the midst of testing their new site for older and senior singles called Lavallife Prime. Officially to launch on May 23, 2007, Lavalife Prime looks to combine social networking (friends and interest groups) and online dating. They plan to offer people the freedom to add to your profile any life experiences, goals and interests you have along with any audio, pictures and videos that go with it. An interesting idea, most social networking sites are geared towards the younger generation, I wonder if this will be the one for the older?

Currently you can only create a profile on Lavalife Prime. You will have to wait to May 23rd to be able to log in and try it out.

When dating online you can meet many different and interesting people. Some you will really like the sound of an others you wont be too sure.

When dating online, you can end up chatting regularly to a particular person, maybe because you feel you have a lot in common or maybe you feel that you just "click".

Sometimes you can spends months talking to someone and almost feel as though you know someone, and missing a day talking to them may make your life feel a little empty. Maybe you text regularly too and are always excited to hear from them and always want to know what they are up to and want to make small talk, but what about distance?? What if the person you really like the sound of isnt local and are some considerable miles away? What do you do? Stay friends? Progress things? There is a lot to consider and we shall endeavour to cover some points in this article.

Ensure before meeting you make good use of the telephone, as in my last article, use the phone as much as possible and get to know more about a person.

So you really like this person, you always get excited to hear from them and you think it is worth persuing.

So you meet this person for the first time, and you like them more in person. Have you really considered everything before meeting? Have you really thought things through??

Here are many points you should consider before getting involved with someone where there is considerable distance between you. Sometimes if you cant manage a long distance relationship then its best not to get emotionally involved at the beginning. This can save a lot of heartache in the long term.

Points to consider at the very beginning:-

- Could you cope with only seeing your partner at the weekends or every two weeks.

- Could you trust your partner enough to leave them for such periods before seeing them again?

- Are they trustworthy, genuine and honest?

- Can you afford the travelling costs involved in seeing someone with the distance between you.

- How long are you prepared to see your partner before you decide you want to move in with them.

- If you decide you want to live with this person, are you prepared to move, or are they prepared to move?

- What do they want long term, do they want the same as you or are they happy with a long distance relationship and seeing you once a week or fortnight?

- Even if you get on very well seeing each once a week, would the relationship change or be much different if one of you were prepared to make the move and live together?

If you are unable to answer any of the above points then maybe ever considering to meet someone who lives some distance away not to be such a good idea, and looking closer for a suitable partner will be a better decision. Whatever you decide this needs to be considered at the very beginning before you ever consider get emotionally involved with someone via online dating, messenger, telephone, or text, otherwise you might be headed for heartache, and this is something that can be easily avoided.

Online dating is generally very safe due to the distance between members. There is no physical contact or even having to sit in the same room, so due to this getting to know someone online is safe.

When getting to know members online you should still follow basic safety rules before you ever give out personal information to another member or arrange to meet.

When getting to know somebody online always keep your wits about you, you do not have to rush, you can take plenty of time to get to know someone, but always beware that you cannot take everything at face value. Sometimes, some things are not always as they appear, which is why you should take time to get to know someone. There are many genuine people around but as there are anywhere, whether in a pub or bar, there is always one or two who are not as they appear.

Here are a few things to remember when getting to know someone on an online dating site, and long before you ever plan to give out personal information or plan to meet.

- Initially, never give out personal information about yourself.

- Don't take everything at face value.

- Ask lots of questions.

- Take your time when getting to know someone online, don't rush things, take plenty of time to get to know as much about someone as possible.

- Watch out for the red herons, the things that dont seem to add up, or contradictions, this may mean that the person you are chatting to is providing you information that might not be a true reflection of themselves.

- Make sure you feel comfortable, and if someone makes you slightly uncomfortable, think twice about continuing your conversation.
If someone is abusive to you, block them and report them to the online dating administrator.

- Don't allow a member to talk you into anything, even if they are very convincing and come across as very genuine and honest. Make sure you are in charge, you do things when you are ready.

- Before considering a date with an online member, make sure you know as much as possible. If you are unsure and need to know more, wait until you have enough information.

- Remember when chatting online, any genuine person will always be happy to wait until you are ready to progress things.

- Make sure you see plenty of photos of the person, so that you are fully aware of their appearance.

If you feel you want to progress from the online dating and chatting, chat on the telephone first and get to know more this way before meeting.

When deciding to meet in person there are still rules to follow, and these go to the same for anyone who is meeting someone for the first time. So this advice also goes to people who have met someone for the first time anywhere, whether in a bar, pub or club, and decides to meet someone for the first time alone with this person.

- Always meet in a public place that is well known to you.

- Always let someone know where you are and where you are going and who you are meeting.

- Consider making a call to a friends during the date of after the date to let friends know that you are fine.

- Consider a lunchtime meeting in a public place during the day.

- Make your own travel arrangements on a date, do not allow your date to drive you home.

- If you are travelling considerable distance to meet someone, make sure you have made accommodation arrangements, do not allow your date to put you up.

- Keep your first date fairly brief, so that you have a time limit allowing you a safe 'exit' point.

- Take a friends and maybe suggest meeting with as a group for the first date so that you are in the company of friends.

It may seem odd to have such rules, but at the end of the day you are meeting a complete stranger, and the information you have about a person may not be accurate. Meeting someone for the first time can be fun, and we don't want to spoil your fun, however we just want to ensure that you keep an open mind and keep your wits about you. Keep a level head and be sensible. Safety comes first and there is plenty of time to get to know someone, remember, you don't have to rush. Take your time.

If you have any further advice which you would like to give, then please don't hesitate to post a comment.

According to this article on BrandWeek True.com has caught over 25,000 sex offenders and felons who have tried to registered. I've always wondered how many people their system has caught. I was never able to find a number about this on True's web site. I've always liked this feature of True and it is a first good step in having a safer online dating environment. I am surprised that the other major dating services have never offered something similar.

Read more about True on our review.

Lavalife released a Press Release yesterday, regarding their 20th Anniversary. Way back in 1987 Lavalife got its start as a company called Teleclassifieds started by 5 young Toronto based entrepreneurs. I didn't realize that Lavalife had been around for so long (mind you in other forms) but I must send out a congrats to these fellow Canadians. It says something about the service Lavalife offers and their ability to stay in the top ten of dating sites for a better part of 20 years.

For more information regarding Lavalife read our review.

As discussed in our forum topic here, True.com has for a while now, been auto generating winks for their members. When signing up for True you can disable this feature but it is enabled by default. The selection box is located near the Terms of Service check box on True's sign up page.

Is this a good idea? Does it help get people interacting on the site or is it a ploy to just get non-paying members to sign up? I personally don't like it, and it definitely should not be enabled by default. This "feature" probably costs True more in bad press than it provides with new paying members.