Online Dating

Every dating site has its own spin on the dating profile format. In this series, I'll take a look at some of the different profile formats and how you can write your best profile for that particular service. Match.com is one of the biggest online dating sites out there with millions and millions of members. It's no wonder why people join up every day looking for love.

Match has a pretty straightforward profile. The sections to fill out are as follows:

• About me and who I'm looking for
• In my own words
• for fun
• my job
• my ethnicity
• my religion
• my education
• favorite hot spots
• favorite things
• last read

The most important part is the About me and who I'm looking for section. Match requires you to fill out at least a few lines of this before your profile can go live. (Ironically enough, there are tons of profiles that reference the fact that they're writing just enough to qualify. Makes you wonder what kind of boyfriend or girlfriend they'd be if they are only committed to doing the bare minimum!)

You should have at least two paragraphs in this section - the first one detailing yourself, and the second detailing the person you'd like to meet. Remember, your profile is the back cover of the story of your life. Don't give people the whole novel! Write just enough to get them intrigued about your most interesting qualities and activities. When writing about your ideal mate, be specific about the kind of personality you want and state things in the positive.

As for the In my own words section, you need to know that you do not have to fill out ANY of it. Seriously, if your About me and who I'm looking for section is great, you can leave the sidebar totally blank and people will still contact you.

Beware of those sidebar questions, though. Keep your responses to one or two short sentences. If you wax on for too long, the typical reader on the internet will get bored. Once you've published them, check out your profile and edit down any that are longer than 3 lines. Keep things short and sweet. For example, here's how I'd write mine:

for fun

I read, write, and roll d20s. Bonus points if you do, too!

my job

I own my own business writing online dating profiles and other web content.

my ethnicity

Pasty Irish chick, blinding astronauts with the glare from my legs!

my religion

I believe all faiths have a piece of the Truth, but not the whole Truth.

my education

Hamilton College, Class of 2001. Music & Creative Writing double major - would you like fries with that?

favorite hot spots

Anywhere I can get really good Asian food!

favorite things

I'd be completely lost without my laptop, my BlackBerry, and my adorable cats.

last read

Desperately trying to get my RSS reader under 1000... help, I'm drowning in feeds!

Match.com allows you to have a TON of pictures, but at minimum you want four. One picture should be a close-up of your face, one full body shot, and two of your choosing (group shot, action shot, etc).

Best of luck on Match.com! Next in the series... JDate profiles!

For more information on the dating site mentioned in this article, read our Match.com review.

Here is the results from a poll that 1,000 Zoosk members took about Virtual Gifts. This information is probably similar for members of other dating sites.

• Only 15 percent of members have ever sent virtual gifts.
• 76 percent stated they were more likely to respond to a potential match who sent them a virtual gift.
• 71 percent send virtual gifts which reflect their personality.
• Traditional virtual digital gifts (flowers, chocolates) make up 37 percent of all gifts sent. Gifts that show off a person's wild side (martini, etc...) make up 27 percent. 23 percent of all gifts are warm and fuzzy (teddy bear, etc...). Finally, 13 percent of virtual gifts are seasonal.

To find out more information about this online dating service you can read our review of Zoosk

According to researchers, internet dating services are used more by a certain type of person which fits a particular psychological profile. In a 2009 survey of 3,345 US citizens, researchers found the following results:

More likely to use Internet Dating

• People who are more sociable.
• Singles with high self-esteem and who put some value in romantic relationships.
• Men and women with low self-esteem and who consider romantic relationships NOT to be an important part of their life.

Less Likely to use Internet Dating

• People who are more introverted.
• Singles with low self-esteem and who put some value in romantic relationships.

The average age of the participant of the survey was 48 and all were between the ages of 19 and 89. 47.5 percent were men and 52.5 percent were woman.

For the full story and more details on the results of the survey, read PsychCentral.

There are a couple schools of thought regarding online dating profiles for single parents. I’ll present both and let you decide which rings true for you and your situation.

Don’t Mention Your Children

Your online dating profile is about you, not your children. The only place you need to mention your children is in the stats area where you select “Have kids,” how many, and your custody arrangement.

After all, your potential match isn’t going to be dating your children – they’ll be dating YOU. You are more than a mother or father. Think about what makes you unique and cool that has nothing to do with your children. Eventually they’ll be grown and out of the house and you’ll have to relate to your spouse on other levels.

According to the Better Business Bureau, complaints about dating services were up 73 percent in 2008. In my opinion, half the problem is the dating sites themselves, the other half are the expectations of some members. Here are a few points you should consider before joining a dating site to ensure you will not be disappointed with the experience.

1. The love of your life may not be found on a dating site - People do fall in love from meeting each other online but this may not be the case for you. For people who use dating sites, a third find love, a third do not find any long lasting relationships, and a third give up.
2. The cost can add up - You can be expected to pay from $10 to $60 per month on most dating sites over your subscription period. If you find you are not satisfied with the service MAKE SURE to turn off the auto renewal of your dating site membership subscription.
3. Research - Talk to your single friends for their opinions on which dating site is the best, and search for reviews online of dating sites (since you are reading this you are off to a good start). You want to make sure you pick the right dating site for you.
4. Free Trials - Free trial memberships on dating sites usually have a number of limitations. Most of the time, you either have full access for a certain number of days to the dating site, OR you have partial access for an unlimited number of days. On dating sites with partial access this usually means you cannot communicate directly with other members. You can only create a profile, search for members and view profiles.
5. Dating Site Criteria - Before paying your money right away, join as a free member and perform a number of searches to look for your ideal match. If the dating site doesn't allow you to see what type of single members they have then they have something to hide. If you didn't find at least 10 to 20 potential matches in your area, then move on. I recommend joining your 3 top pick dating services using the free trials after you have done your research (Point 3). From there you can pick the best one.
6. Personal e-mail address - When joining any website (not just dating) you may want to use a throw away email address for privacy and safety reasons. These are readily available through Gmail, Hotmail and Yahoo. This will keep any unwanted email from reaching your personal account.

For more points on how to avoid entering into a bad relationship with a dating site, read the full article at MSNBC.

Our review of BlackPeopleMeet.com (BPM) is finally up. I had originally planned to have this review ready a couple of months ago but things kept getting in the way of me finishing it up (my subscription even ran out). With the recent purchase of People Media (the owners of BPM) by IAC (owners of Match.com), I thought it would be a good time to finish up the review (see Story). Expect to see more reviews coming soon of some other People Media dating sites, including SeniorPeopleMeet.com and SingleParentMeet.com.

If you are interested in meeting African-American singles, check out the full BlackPeopleMeet.com Review now.

Are you a member of BlackPeopleMeet.com? If so, why don't you post your own review.

BlackPeopleMeet.com User Review