Online Dating

When you’re first starting out in online dating, the sheer amount of choice can be a bit overwhelming. Before you even start to think about a profile, you’re confronted with a myriad of online dating sites - and they can be as different from one another as any other place you might meet someone new. How to choose? Well, with a little self-reflection, the decision might become a little easier.

First, dream up a potential match. Then take notes. Is there any defining characteristic that absolutely takes priority above all others? For example, is sharing the same religion a must? How about the same political perspective? If something like that is an absolute must, it might be a good idea to examine niche sites. In a niche site geared to your interest, there’s no need to filter out the ones who don’t fit your priorities; they wouldn’t have joined the site if you didn’t already have that in common. One of the base ways to finding a dating site like this is to use our search tool. You can search for dating sites by specifying your own personal attributes and what type of match you are looking for. From here our site will return the top dating sites that match your criteria.

On the other hand, if you’re looking to step outside your personal box, maybe date someone completely different from your past relationships, or are just open to love in whatever form it happens to take, you’ll want to think broader. A more generalized dating site offers the best of both worlds. You can limit your options using a custom search, but you can also throw expectation to the wind and peruse the profiles of people you might not otherwise meet.

Whether or not you choose a niche site or one simply geared toward meeting your match, it’s probably a good idea to try one that is as popular as possible. The more popular the site, the larger the pool of prospects. Plus, many people have accounts at more than one site, so it’s entirely possible that everyone you would meet on a tiny site is already at one of the big ones - along with many more who aren’t on the smaller site. Many people keep an account at a large, general site and a smaller niche site with minimal overlap, just to keep all their bases covered.

The best way to find the site that works for you is to just give it a shot. Many sites offer free trials, or allow you to skim the site without an account. Some are free altogether. Remember: the goal is to find a site that is the best fit for you. Your friends and family may have had different experiences, but the match you’re looking for is for you, not them. By jumping in and finding the site that is the best fit for you, you’ll be even more comfortable and confident in your decisions as you move to the next step - finding someone with whom you’re compatible.

One of our reviewed dating sites Positive Singles, has been mentioned in a New York Daily News article on dating sites and sexually-transmitted diseases. Like other STD dating sites Positive Singles match people based not only on interests, location and personality but also on the same STD infections.

Positive Singles currently has more than 700,000 members since it launched and has over 15,000 people visit the site every day. From our investigations it is the largest dating site that caters to members with an STD. The Center for Disease Control and Prevention reports in the United States that in a given year there are over 110 million cases of sexually-transmitted infections reported. About a third of the US population is single so this would mean that at least 33 million singles have a STD. I would bet this number is significantly higher since a single person is most likely to have many more sexual partners in a given year than someone in a long-term relationship and/or marriage. I could see this number being as high 60 million.

You can take a look at our Positive Singles review here.

Confession #1: I am guilty.

I will be the first to admit that the prospect of acquiring a partner and acquiring that partner's debt is a little scary. I attended one of the most expensive private universities in the country - it's terrifying contemplating my own debt, much less my debt combined with someone else's.

Years ago, when a new date confessed he was multiple tens of thousands of dollars in credit card debt, I could feel some of my excitement about him evaporate. It was like someone instantly started lowering the volume on my attraction knob.

Confession #2: His debt never affected our relationship, which turned out to be a long and very happy one. Although it ended up being a total non-issue, I still remember how I felt when those words first came out of his mouth. It may not have been one for me, but is debt a dating dealbreaker for others?

eHarmony paired up with CreditCards.com to answer that question. Here's what their study revealed:

• 65% of men and 71% of women agreed that sharing the same attitudes towards managing money is the most important factor in a relationship.
• 48% of men and 57% of women say debt is a turn-off in a partner.
• Keeping credit card debt a secret is a breakup-worthy offense to 54% of men and 70% of women (that's the same percentage of women who would breakup with a partner if they found out he had a criminal history).
• The most common arguments for couples are about money, say 71% of men and 75% of women.
• Would you pool your money with a partner if you thought he or she was irresponsible with finances? 72% of men and 80% of women say "No."

That sounds like a whole lot of bad news, but don't fret - there are a couple of lights at the end of the tunnel. Debt may be a deal breaker to some, but it's not the most serious offense a partner can commit. Most men and women think a criminal history and cheating are bigger reasons to break off a relationship.

Most Americans also believe that a partner's spending habits can be changed. 69% say it's ok to insist that a partner alter his or her spending habits. Looking at it by gender, 70% of men and 68% of women think they should try to influence a partner's monetary decisions.

When it comes to money matters, money matters. Be honest with your partners and make sure you're on the same financial page.

Do you need a gift for a single friend or family member? Christian Café is now offering gift certificates (it looks like since Dec. 2012) which is the ideal way to buy someone else a membership. You can purchase a 1, 3, 6, or 12 month gift subscription at the same price as a regular member would. A Christian Café membership right now are also still 25% off for anything over a month.

The recipient of your Christian Café membership will have full access to the site including use of the iPhone and Android dating app.

For more information on this dating site you can read our Christian Café review.

I just notice that my connection has timed out when I tried to visit ChristianMingle.com. I first notice the problem at 12:05pm today. I am not sure if the site is too busy or that Christian Mingle's web servers are offline due to a hardware or software problem.

We will update this post when we get more information.

Update #1: As of 12:23 pm EST a message comes up stating that the site is momentarily down and to try back again shortly. No reason is given for the outage though it obviously is not their internet connection since they can serve the problem page. The Christian Mingle customer service phone number is also given: 1-866-660-7924

Update #2: I just checked (1:33pm) Christian Mingle is back up and working fine. They were still down at 1:00pm so it looks like ChristianMingle.com was down just 1.5 hours or so.

The United States online dating industry market research report from IBISWorld has updated their numbers for 2012 and their predictions for 2013 and beyond.

For the last 5 years the online dating industry has seen an average revenue increase of 2.9 percent and should reach $2 billion annually in 2013. After a slight dip in 2009 due to the recession revenues are up in large part to the increase use of smartphones and tablets by single adults who have a lot of disposable income. Realizing this, dating sites have created dating apps for their services on a wide range of mobile devices including the iPhone, Android and Blackberry. Most of these devices are also GPS enabled which has led to location based dating as well.

In the last 5 years the number of dating services has increased in the US on average every year by 3.1 percent according to IBISWorld to 3,898. Employment has also increased by the same amount by these dating companies to an estimate of 7,376.

IBISWorld predicts that demand will be strong in the next 5 years for online dating services. This is due in part to the increase use of smartphones and the increase in internet access for households. Mobile dating revenue is expected to almost double in the upcoming 5 years.