Online Dating

There's something magical about springtime. After a winter of hibernation, everyone is ready throw on shorts and venture outside for the first time in three months, blinking and stumbling into the light like survivors of a disaster movie.

Unless, like me, you live in New York City and spent your first day of spring cowering under a blanket, watching snow fall outside your window and cursing the weather gods. It's not all shorts and sundresses yet, but come May sunbathing in Central Park will feel that much more glorious.

For those of you who didn't just get pummeled by snow, the flowers are blooming and so is romance. New data from Zoosk suggests that online dating rates go up in spring, meaning “spring fever” might be a very real thing.

Zoosk's data scientists analyzed 9.6 million conversations, over 850,000 signups, and over 66 million member sessions in search of scientific evidence for spring fever. Is it real? Is it possible to quantify the condition? Do people date differently in spring compared to other seasons?

By comparing the data of Zoosk members from the first two weeks of spring to the data from a month prior, Zoosk claims to have found “conclusive evidence” that spring fever is indeed a real phenomenon.

It began with messages. Zoosk reports that 34% more first messages are sent daily during springtime. After months of online food orders and Netflix being our only companions, it appears spring brings out our desire to connect with other humans again. And it's not just about quantity. The messages sent during spring are also “deeper” - meaning that each user in the conversation sends at least two messages. 28% more messages started daily in spring meet the criteria.

Of course, in order to get to the talking part, people have to sign up in the first place. And they do. Zoosk discovered an 11% increase in daily registrations in spring.

It makes perfect sense when you stop to think about it. This is, after all, the season during which most of Mother Nature's creatures feel a little extra frisky. And it's much easier to find the motivation to dress up and go out when you don't run the risk of developing frostbite by doing so. Not to mention that the mind is much more inclined to wander when you're looking at short sleeves and skirts, rather than knee-length down coats, clunky snow boots, and balaclavas. Dress it up all you want, but “bank robber” is never a good look.

Everyone in online dating talks about how important the profile photo is. We try to act like looks don't matter as much as what's underneath – and although that's true in the long run, you're lying to yourself if you think looks don't matter at all. Picture yourself shopping. You don't purchase the products with subpar packaging; you go for the ones that look nice, regardless of which one is actually better.

Like it or not, we are all judging and being judged online. As you attempt to craft the perfect online dating profile, you'll be tempted to post the most exceptional pictures you can find. Competition is fierce on online dating sites, so the quickest road to standing out is looking the best you can, right?

Wrong, according to mathematician Hannah Fry. In a TED talk Fry discusses the mathematics of love and offers several tips for finding that special someone. Like most of life, love is full of patterns, she says. Mathematics can be used to study patterns, and therefore mathematics can give us insight into love.

“How attractive you are does not dictate how popular you are,” Fry explains. “And, actually, having people think that you're ugly can work to your advantage.” She shares a graph from OkCupid that plots measured attractiveness against messages received in the last month. Immediately it becomes clear that being considered highly attractive is not a guarantee you'll receive many messages.

What matters more, surprisingly, is that you divide opinion. To make sense of it, imagine being on the other end of things. In the first scenario, you're interested in someone and you suspect other people won't be very interested in them. This is a good situation, because it means less competition for you and more incentive to reach out.

If, on the other hand, you think the person you're into will be highly sought after, you may feel less motivated to contact them. The thought of so much competition – and a high likelihood of rejection – is a strong deterrent.

So, if you use a terrible photo, people will be put off. But, if you use a photo that's too attractive, people may feel like they don't have a chance with you. The best strategy, then, is to go for something in the middle ground. You want to be attractive without looking like you're out of reach.

Fry advises to embrace the things that make you different – whether it's a scar or a receding hairline – even if you think some people will find those qualities unattractive. The people who like you will like you anyway, and the people who don't weren't a match in the first place.

When we talk about dating, it's often referred to as a game. We even call some people “players.”

But as much fun as games are, it isn't the most effective metaphor for online dating. Real success comes when you put your power suit on (mentally) and treat online dating like a business. You are the product, and the best way to sell that product is to run a strong marketing campaign.

Think of your profile as a sales pitch. The right one will attract the target customer and motivate them to make a purchase. Here are a few tips for writing a profile like a marketing guru:

1. Define the product. You can't sell something if you don't understand what that something is in the first place. What's your story? What's your personal brand? What are your most marketable qualities? Choose a few and optimize your profile to highlight them.
2. Define your audience. Who are you marketing to? Somewhere in your head, you have a vision of the ideal partner. Make that vision as clear as possible, then write your profile in a way that's designed to attract their attention.
3. Write a catchy hook. Email marketing is all about the subject line. If it's lame, no one will open the email and the message inside will never be read. Many online dating profiles also have a tag line feature. Make sure it stands out from the crowd and piques the reader's curiosity.
4. Stay on top of the latest trends. Marketers know the times are always changing and their strategies must evolve with them. You, too, are always changing. Make sure you update your profile regularly so it always presents the most accurate picture of you possible.
5. Test. A marketing guru is constantly pouring over metrics and analytics because it's the only way to determine the success of a campaign. Take a look at who is messaging you. Is it the kind of person you want to attract? If not, switch up your strategy and try again.
6. Keep it professional. You won't see many marketing materials with mistakes (and if you do, someone's probably getting fired). Use your spell check. Avoid negative language. Don't sound desperate. Keep it short, sweet, simple, and to the point. Remove all opportunities for your audience to see you as anything less than a great investment.
7. Create a call to action. A business fails if it never makes a sale, so after you've shown a customer how amazing your product is, ask them to buy it. Prompt your audience to take the next step. Try adding a “You should message me if...” section to your profile, or ask an interesting question that prospective suitors can respond to in a message.

This isn't to say that dating is all work and no play. Of course it isn't, and thinking of yourself as a product isn't a healthy long-term mindset. Instead, find the happy balance between game and business. That's when you become a success story.

The most successful dating apps are based on visuals, and typically pull your photos from Facebook to create your dating “profile.” This allows potential dates to swipe left and right, rejecting or showing interest – depending almost entirely on the photos you have posted.

Now dating app Glimpse takes things one step further. Acknowledging the power of visuals, the new app uses your Instagram account to help you find matches. That is, Glimpse reveals photos you have taken on Instagram to potential matches, so they can get an idea of your interests, who you are, and what you like.

Instagram seems like a natural fit for online dating, but Glimpse is not the first to make a dating app using visual social media platforms. Take dating app Dreamcliq, launched a couple of years ago to little fanfare, which allows you to create a “vision board” of your interests to attract potential dates - matching according to photo-based profiles. The company marketed the app as being inspired by Pinterest.

There are some challenges with Glimpse. First, if your Instagram is full of selfies, it might be a turn-off for your dates. There are only so many duck faces potential mates can handle. Same thing if you like taking pictures of your food, or your puppy, or even your hiking landscapes – a few artful photographs are great, but sometimes it's too much. Also, what does an extensive photo collection tell you about the person taking the photo, other than they like their dogs, hikes, or crème brulee?

Unlike apps like Tinder, Glimpse doesn’t match based on location, but rather through your hashtags, events, locations and other similarities on Instagram. So, let’s say you include #sunsets or #foodporn tags in a few photos – you’ll be matched with singles in your area who used the same trending phrases. Or, you could be matched with someone you met last month at a party during your work conference. In other words, there seems to be a little more flexibility as well as common interests than a typical dating app. Plus, it gives you a starting point for conversation – something that is missing with Tinder.

Another advantage of Glimpse is that you can advertise yourself through visuals – but instead of worrying about how great your hair looks or whether or not you look big in a certain dress, the app lets you tell a story of who you are through your photos.

Glimpse launched in February and is available on iTunes, but by invitation only.

Singles in the US are feeling totally emojional.

The days of the regular ol' smiley face are long gone. America has upped its emoticon game and we're officially living in the Age of Emoji.

Match.com is back with another installment of its annual Singles in America study. This year, they surveyed a nationally representative sample of over 5,600 US. singles aged 18 to 70+ years and one of 2015's hot topics was emoji use.

“If you had asked me a year ago what I thought of emoticons and emojis, I would have said they are fun and entertaining, but I probably wouldn’t have thought they could help our understanding of human behavior,” writes Dr. Justin R. Garcia. “But as more and more people of varying ages in my own social networks – family, friends, colleagues, dates – use emoticons and emojis...I’ve come to appreciate them as something more than funny little characters.”

To the uninitiated, emojis are practically another language. Even to the initiated, there's bound to be a character or two that's just puzzling. And to a growing number of behavioral scientists, emojis actually are a new form of nonverbal communication to be studied. “In an age of rapid mobile interaction,” Dr. Garcia writes, emojis are a 21^st century system of emotional expression and interpersonal engagement “that can help us understand human affect.”

When asked why they use emojis, US singles offered three top reasons:

• PERSONALITY: They give my text messages more personality (49% men, 53% women)
• EMOTION: It’s easier for me to express my feelings (37% men, 36% women)
• CONVENIENCE: It’s faster and easier than writing a full message (21% men, 18% women)

When asked which emojis singles favor for flirting, the following were the top three responses:

• Winky face (53% of singles)
• Smiley face (38% of singles)
• Kissy face (27% of singles)

Emoji users shared several traits. 62% want to be married (compared to only 30% of non-emoji users) and are more likely to place a high value on finding a partner who is a good communicator. Emoji users are also much more likely to be actively dating and to have sex.

But don't take things too far. While 40% of singles use emoticons and emojis regularly, nearly 75% agree that you should limit your use to 1-3 per conversation. Any more than that, and you may text yourself straight out of a date.

For more on the service which conducted this study you can read our Match.com review.

Are you excited about the new Tinder Plus service that has rolled out in the U.S.? Don't get too carried away – turns out, if you’re 30 or older, you’ll have to pay more than your younger single counterparts.

Tinder is charging users of its premium service only $9.99 if they are under 30, but those 30 and older have to pay $19.99 per month for the same service. In the U.K., the pay gap is even larger.

Tinder has been testing pricing and features of Tinder Plus in various markets prior to its U.S. roll out, which is expected to happen in late March. Reports have been mixed – while Tinder claims that its users have responded favorably to the premium service and its features (as well as pricing), the app’s ratings have declined in the U.K. app store thanks to several harsh reviews.

The success of the new service is important to Tinder, who has yet to capitalize on the sheer number of users of the free service. The company has struggled to come up with viable revenue streams that don’t take away from the user experience (they have tried to avoid in-app advertising), in order to maintain their growing user base. Offering a tiered premium service like Tinder Plus seems the best answer, adding some popular features based on users’ requests - such as the ability to go back and see rejected profiles, or to meet matches in different cities.

But along with these improvements, there are reports that Tinder is placing limits on the number of swipes any user can do per day for the free service (which sparked outrage in the U.K. app stores), prompting users to buy the premium service if they want to continue swiping.

And the latest controversy appears to be age discrimination. In a statement to defend its unusual pricing technique, Tinder said this to NPR: "Over the past few months, we've tested Tinder Plus extensively in several countries…Lots of products offer differentiated price tiers by age, like Spotify does for students, for example. Tinder is no different; during our testing we've learned, not surprisingly, that younger users are just as excited about Tinder Plus but are more budget constrained and need a lower price to pull the trigger." 

Not everyone is buying Tinder’s explanation. As website Engadget pointed out, this “sleazy” move by Tinder will likely cause more people to lie about their ages on Facebook.

The real test will has come now since Tinder Plus made its U.S. debut this month. Perhaps this is the move that will make room for other competitors in the crowded dating app market.