Dating Services

According to a new study, 50% of couples will have met online by the year 2031.

As it stands, roughly a third of married couples today have met online, and the numbers keep growing. New research by eHarmony found that in the near future 38% of couples will have met online or through a matchmaking service, and by 2040, about 7 in 10 couples will have met online.

People seem to be pulling away from meeting people at bars or parties and instead looking to a bigger pool of candidates online. The research shows that more people have access to the Internet, especially with the rise in popularity of smartphones, which has led to more people taking advantage of online dating services and apps. Internet usage in general has doubled in the past decade among those aged 18-64, from about 43% to 88%. More than half of online daters use smartphones to interact with their matches and online dating services.

According to eHarmony's study, those aged 55 to 64 are expected to have the biggest online dating boom, with a 30 percent increase between 2013 and 2030 - from 1.87 million to 2.41 million.

Romain Bertrand, marketing director of eHarmony, told the U.K.'s Daily Mail: "In the decades to come, online dating will not only be an efficient way to meet a partner, but will be by far and away the most common way that couples meet and initially communicate. One of the most significant developments we've seen at eHarmony is a substantial increase in the number of people who access our site on a smartphone or tablet device, which now stands at about half of all our members."

Part of the growing popularity of online dating stems from the fact that fewer people are meeting potential long-term partners through work or school. Since 2007, the number of couples who met through work or school has dropped from 18% to 12%. One explanation for this could be the rise of smart phones and dating apps like Tinder, which are easy to use and provide a convenient and fast way to meet new people. Young daters aren't necessarily ready to get involved in a serious relationship while they are in school, so online dating provides a viable way to meet people after they leave campus.

As for those who meet at work, there is a risk involved, especially if the company has a no-go policy on workplace relationships. Also, it's a lot more appealing to get involved with an online date than with a co-worker you will still have to see every day should things go badly. Online dating provides more options.

If the state of dating in America in 2014 was summed up in one word, it would be "open-minded."

ChristianMingle.com and JDate.com have teamed up for the second year in a row to bring you inside information on what it means to be single and dating in the United States in the 21st century. The second annual State Of Dating In America report explores the ever-evolving public opinion on sex, infidelity, gender roles and other controversial issues. It also delves into the ways mobile technology is affecting and changing societal norms of courtship and relationships.

"In today's modern world there are so many factors contributing to blurred lines and mixed messages when it comes to dating and relationships," says Rachel Sussman, a Marriage and Family Therapist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker who partnered with ChristianMingle and JDate to analyze the findings of their study. "I see clients every day who are struggling with how to navigate muddled waters in a new or long-term relationship, and this study by ChristianMingle and JDate confirms these issues exist across the country."

The big news coming out of those muddled waters this year is that singles are becoming more and more open-minded when it comes to gender roles, dating expectations and infidelity. Singles have accepted that infidelity isn't always a black and white issue. Shades of gray are an inevitable part of being in a relationship:

• 86% of men and 92% of women consider having sex repeatedly with another person to be cheating.
• 82% of women and 56% of men believed sexting or online flirting is infidelity back in 2013. But this year the number of women who believe that flirtatious messages count as stepping out dropped significantly to 86%, while the number for men dropped slightly to 51%.
• In 2014, 90% of women agree that passionately kissing someone else is cheating. In 2013, that number was 100%. Men's opinions reflected women's shifting views: 86% considered passionate kissing cheating in 2013, compared to 75% in 2014.
• Cheating isn't always a dealbreaker. Nearly a quarter of singles say they would consider marrying someone who is unfaithful to them while dating.

Attitudes toward gender roles are also evolving in major ways. Fewer men believe that they should be the primary breadwinner in a relationship, and fewer men believe it's their duty to pick up the tab on a date. We are, apparently, increasingly confused about whether or not we're actually on a date or just hanging out with someone casually, but we're also increasingly open to the idea of dating online.

94% of respondents say online dating expands their dating pool. Two out of three singles know people who've met through online dating. And 85% of singles say they believe online dating is completely socially acceptable.

For more information on the dating sites which conducted the survey you can read our Christian Mingle review and our JDate review.

What if you could meet, woo, and win your fiancé in just 90 days?

That's exactly what Chris McKinlay, a Boston mathematician, did in June 2012. McKinlay was good at math, but not so good where his love life was concerned. So he did what any enterprising mathematician would do: developed complex algorithms and used robot profiles to systematically sift through thousands of profiles on OkCupid to find his perfect match.

McKinlay was working on his PhD at UCLA in June 2012 when he first joined OkCupid. After answering 350 questions from the thousands available on the site, he discovered that he only had a compatibility rating of over 90% with fewer than 100 women. Six disappointing dates later, and McKinlay realized that something needed to change. He decided to apply his data skills to his dating life.

He began by creating 12 robot profiles that answered all of the questions randomly and used them to mine the survey answers of all women on the site. Then, armed with 6 million answers from 20,000 prospective mates, he used an algorithm to analyze the women he would like to meet. He limited his search to LA or San Francisco based partners who had logged on within the last month and clustered their personalities into two types that appealed to him most: "indie" women in their mid-20s and slightly older creative-types. After creating two different profiles for himself designed to target each cluster, he then answered the top 500 survey questions for each group.

The hack worked. McKinlay suddenly found himself with a 90%-plus compatibility rating with more than 10,000 women. Because OkCupid notifies users when someone looks at their profile, McKinlay designed software that would automatically view as many profiles as possible, prompting curious matches to initiate conversation with him. He received about 20 messages per day and went on 87 dates, but just one - the 88th - was special.

28-year-old Christine Tien Wang, an artist pursuing a master's in fine arts at UCLA, caught his attention and the two hit it off. They've been together ever since, surviving through Wang's one-year art fellowship in Qatar and McKinlay's admission that he'd used rather unconventional means to meet the woman of his dreams. "I thought it was dark and cynical," Wang told Wired. "I liked it."

McKinlay maintains that he was just doing "a large-scale and machine-learning version of what everyone does on the site," and unusual though his approach may sound, it's hard to argue with success. McKinlay and Wang are now engaged, and he has written a book to help others find spouses through online dating...it doesn't get much more successful than that.

You'd have to be living under a rock not to be familiar with the cooler-than-thou hipster subculture. While self-identified hipsters believe they value independent thinking, counter-culture, progressive politics, an appreciation of art and indie-rock, creativity, and intelligence, what their philosophy looks like to an outsider is completely different. "Effortless cool" takes a whole lot of effort, and edginess ceases to be edgy when everyone's doing it.

Still, the hipster ethos persists. Hipsters reject the mainstream in every way possible, including online dating. The more unusual the dating site, the better. Can a single hipster say they were using a site before you started using it? Or, better yet, that they'd gotten bored of the site before you'd even heard of it? Bingo - we have a winner.

Luckily, single scenesters have plenty of niche dating sites to choose from. There's GlutenFreeSingles.com, for those with actual intolerances and those who just want to jump on the bandwagon of the latest cool food trend. There's ClownDating.com, for those who love clowns and would like a clown to love them. Can't get enough of Sriracha? Join Hot Sauce Passions to find a fiery flame. There's also Mullet Passions, Trek Passions, Sea Captain Date, and Purrsonals (hipsters love their furry friends!). Or maybe you'd prefer to try what might be the most hipster niche dating site of all: Amish-Online-Dating.com.

Can the Amish even use computers? Who cares? That makes the site even more underground and cool.

I'm sorry to burst your bubble, hipsters, but the days of cool cachet from niche dating sites are almost over. When the Wall Street Journal publishes a trend piece on Atlasphere, a dating site for Ayn Rand appreciators, and Farmers Only, a self-explanatory dating sites that proclaims "City folks just don't get it," it's safe to say they've officially made the jump to mainstream.

"A growing number of niche dating sites have popped up to serve people who think they know exactly the type of person they want," The Journal writes. And that's awesome - part of the beauty of the Internet is its ability to connect people who never would have connected otherwise. Even the most specific single stands solid chance of finding someone who sets their stomach a-flutter.

On the other hand, that could also be the downfall of online dating. If we live in a world where niche dating sites rule, what happens to opposites attracting or chance encounters? What awesome people are we missing out on if we narrow down potential loves by one or two traits?

Fortunately, I don't think there's much to worry about. With all the new mainstream media attention on these unconventional dating services, it's probably only a matter of time before curious folks flood the sites and hipsters are forced to leave for cooler pastures.

According to a recent study aiming to find the most desirable single in 2014, you'll have the most luck if you're 25 years old and rich.

The study pooled information from about 81,000 singles between the ages of 25-35 on the dating website Plenty of Fish, along with about 1.8 million messages to see what traits were the most desirable in both men and women who are online dating.

For both sexes, men and women in their twenties received more messages than those in their thirties. Women who were between 25 and 26 years old received the most messages, with a sharp decline once they turned 33.

It seems that both men and women prefer singles who make money. Women who earned between $50,000-$75,000 and men who earned between $75,000-$150,000 attracted more prospective dates than those earning less. And men who have law degrees are also likely to be the most successful in garnering attention online, with 33% more messages than the average single guy.

While data like this paints a certain picture of online dating, it's good to keep in mind that this is information gathered from only one online dating site and from just one demographic. If we were to look at online dating as a whole, the fastest-growing segment is singles over 50. And many people prefer paid dating sites like Match.com or eHarmony because daters tend to be more serious if they buy a subscription.

Free dating sites have always skewed younger, because many young daters aren't interested in serious relationships and want a chance to meet a lot of people. Paid dating sites tend to attract users of all ages who are on different levels of the dating spectrum - from casual to marriage-minded.

Twenty-somethings are also gravitating towards dating apps rather than online dating sites. Apps like Tinder, Hinge, and Are You Interested have been on the rise, mostly because of the ease of creating a profile and meeting people immediately, whereas most online dating sites require a little more effort and time before you're meeting each other face-to-face.

So while the POF study might feed into the stereotypes that persist about online dating (that singles prefer if you're young, earn a lot of money, etc.) - there are in reality a wide variety of singles who are online dating. Don't be afraid to explore a number of dating sites and see which one works best for you. This is the best time of year to do it, since more people than ever are online dating!

Do you know when you're on a date and when you're just hanging out? If you're confused about the difference - you're not alone. It's getting harder and harder to tell for a lot of singles.

According to a new study by Christian Mingle and JDate, there is a lot of ambiguity. Their online survey of 2,647 singles of varying ages (18-59) shows that 69% of respondents are confused about whether an outing with someone they're interested in is a date or not.

Maybe the confusion comes in with the definition of a date. According to the data, only 22% agree that "if they ask me out, it's a date," whereas 24% think it's a "planned evening with a group of friends."

So why all the ambiguity? According to the study, technology might have something to do with it. Fifty-seven percent of 18- to 24-year-olds say texting has made it more difficult to determine whether an outing is an actual date. But among older daters, that isn't necessarily true. Only 36% of 35-44 year-olds think that texting has made it more difficult.

The ambiguity isn't gender-specific either - both men and women generally agree. Mostly, opinions vary by age. The younger the dater, the less likely he or she is certain whether or not it's a date.

"In today's modern world there are so many factors contributing to blurred lines and mixed messages when it comes to dating and relationships," says Rachel Sussman, Marriage and Family Therapist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker who analyzed the results of the study. "I see clients every day who are struggling with how to navigate muddled waters in a new or long-term relationship, and this study by ChristianMingle and JDate confirms these issues exist across the country."

Expectations for men to pay on a date seem to be declining, too. Only 69 percent of men say the man should foot the bill for a date (vs. last year's study of 78 percent). This might be part of the dating ambiguity issue, too, because if the outing isn't clearly defined, there's no need to offer to pay as a gesture of affection or chivalry.

While singles might not agree on what constitutes a date, they do overwhelmingly agree (by 85%) that online dating is a socially acceptable way to meet people. Also, two out of three know couples who have met through online dating sites. Ninety-four percent believe that online dating expands their dating pool.

While the definition of a date might be more and more ambiguous, it seems that online dating is gaining more and more acceptance as time goes on. We'll see what the results say next year.