Dating Services

Dating apps are fast becoming the rage among young singles, especially location-based apps like Tinder, typically used for the purpose of hooking up. But a new service called Twine aims to do things a little differently.

Instead of scrolling through photos to see who's "hot or not", like Tinder, Twine pulls information from your Facebook profiles and matches you with other members nearby based on mutual interests. Oh, and they also blur out photos so that you can start chatting and flirting first, and then decide if you want to reveal your pics to each other later.

While this might sound like a waste of time to daters looking to meet someone quickly, many women tend to shy away from location-based dating apps, which doesn't help the odds if you're a man. Females (more than males) get barraged with invitations from potential dates, and because of the overload of guys virtually approaching them, they are less likely to engage. However, with Twine, everyone has to work a little harder, which makes it that much more engaging, and potentially that much more appealing to female users.

Another great aspect of Twine's strategy is that it aims to cut down on spam and fake profiles. One way it does this is through gender restrictions. Men and women using the service must be represented in equal numbers, so if there are currently more men signed up than women, new members will be put on a waiting list until more women join. Also, users aren't allowed to upload their own photos, they are instead pulled directly from your Facebook profile, so you can't post a picture of someone else.

Other dating apps have launched recently that are also focused on delivering more quality matches. One such app is At First Sight, which provides short video profiles of members to scroll through. With this app, you're getting a feel for what the person is like, how he sounds, what gestures he uses - rather than just a static photo - which helps when making a decision about whether or not you want to meet someone. (It also helps filter those fake profiles.) When I downloaded it however, it was a little clumsy to use. The videos are presented in a chain, and you can keep scrolling down until you find someone who interests you, which means you might stop and start several different video profiles. I do like that each person chooses a question to answer, rather than just a free-flowing format.

Regardless of your preferences, dating apps are here to stay, and might well be the most popular way to meet singles in the future. Even traditional online dating sites are developing their own apps. Either way, isn't it good to have more opportunities to meet people, no matter how you do it?

Once upon a time, in a galaxy that now seems far, far away, online dating was considered the last refuge of the hopeless. It was something to be ashamed of, a final resort for people who had exhausted all other opportunities for finding love. (And secretly, we didn't think they'd be able to find it online either.)

Oh, how the tables have turned. Online dating is now the second most popular way for couples to meet, surpassed only by meeting through mutual friends. It's part of a daily routine for millions of people - wake up, read your email, check Facebook, answer messages on your online dating site. It's even starting to feel like the people who haven't tried online dating are in the minority.

According to Harry Reis, a professor of psychology who coauthored a 2012 study on online dating called Online Dating: A Critical Analysis From the Perspective of Psychological Science, the switch likely happened because the Western world experienced a transition in the way it approaches romance. Prior to the rise of online dating, it was difficult for adults to meet each other once they'd moved on from high school and college. Online dating offered a fresh take on connection.

"Online dating is definitely a new and much needed twist on relationships," says Reis. "The Internet holds great promise for helping adults form healthy and supportive romantic partnerships, and those relationships are one of the best predictors of emotional and physical health."

Online dating was a natural progression. In this hyper-connected era in which we spend a good portion of our lives on the Web, it's no surprise that we find ourselves drawn to online dating. Dating sites provide a sense of security, and unprecedented access and information.

When you log on to a dating site, you feel confident that that (most) everyone you see is looking for a date, and you're able to extract large amounts of information about potential partners immediately, before you've ever even spoken. On top of that, most dating sites help you narrow the field further using detailed search metrics and complex matching systems.

That sounds pretty futuristic and space age-y as-is, but online dating is already beginning to evolve into something else. With more people using the Internet on mobile devices than desktops or laptops, the world of online dating is starting to blend into traditional dating to form the latest craze: mobile dating.

Apps like Tinder and Swoon streamline the dating experience by eschewing long profiles in favor of simple processes to browse and select dates. And unlike standard dating websites, these mobile apps connect you with dates in your immediate area, making dating's newest direction easier and more relaxed than it has ever been before.

eHarmony is one of the biggest dating sites in the biz. 438 eHarmony members marry every day in the United States, making the site responsible for nearly 4% of U.S. marriages.

Granted, that data comes from a 2012 survey conducted for the site by Harris Interactive, but I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. eHarmony clearly has a good thing going, and they must have learned a thing or two about finding love online over the course of their 10+ year history.

The eHarmony blog recently tackled the topic of profile-writing strategies to optimize interest from potential matches. These were their picks for the 10 things you should never write in an online dating profile:

1. Never dismiss online dating. It's a classic "Don't bite the hand that feeds you" thing. If you want to meet a date online, it's probably best if you don't start things off by insulting online dating and the people who try it. Just sayin'.
2. Never lie. You're bored of hearing this one, so I'll keep it short: your lies only last as long as the conversation remains online. As soon as you're face-to-face with a date, it's obvious that you're shorter, older, a different weight, etc., so don't bother pretending otherwise.
3. Never list what you're looking for money-wise or baby-wise in a relationship. I have to (partially) disagree here. Sure, money is probably a conversation better left for a future date, but if you are a parent or it's important to you that you're a parent in the future, I vote for putting it in your profile. There's no point in wasting time with dates who don't share your plans re: children.
4. Never use your profile to write about the ex. Treat your profile like a first date. Your ex is not an appropriate topic of conversation in either situation.
5. Never whine. No one's looking for a pessimist to add to their life. Complaining about singlehood, previous relationships, and your bad dating experiences is not going to win over potential matches.
6. Never ramble. Your profile should be complete, but it should not be a dissertation on your life. Keep it concise and interesting, and make sure you leave some discoveries left over for when you're actually on a date.
7. Don't be too vague or use too many clichéd phrases. You enjoy having fun and spending time with your friends? Wow, what a coincidence - so do I. And so does everyone else on the planet. Yawn. Fill your profile with details that actually reflect you as an individual.
8. Never divulge too much personal information. We're talking contact info, place of work, home address...anything that identifies you and your whereabouts so specifically is just begging for a stalker.
9. Never indulge the inner narcissist. Be clear about what you want in a partner, but phrase it nicely. Ditch the sentences about what you 'deserve.'
10. Never leave things blank. It makes a bad first impression. If you can't put the effort into filling out your profile, what kind of effort are you going to put into a relationship?

For more on this dating site you can read our review of eHarmony.

Mobile technology may be changing how we date, according to a recent study by popular dating websites ChristianMingle.com and JDate.com. Texting is fast becoming the preferred method of communication in relationships, including asking someone out for the first time or even for breaking up.

The study found that approximately one third of men (31%) and slightly more women (33%) find it easier to ask someone out on a date via text rather than making a phone call. Also, 55% of singles feel their mobile devices make it easier to meet and get to know people they may be interested in dating. And 64% of singles feel the quality of relationships with those they are dating or interested in dating has improved due to their mobile devices.

The study notes that mobile devices make it easier to break up, too. More than 50 percent of singles said they would consider breaking up with someone they were casually dating via text and an incredible 24% would consider ending an exclusive relationship that way.

Technology has been a part of dating for a while. Online dating started as a novel idea that gained popularity over time. Mobile technology has provided us with even more access to meeting people and dating, since our phones travel with us. We can meet a friend at the bar, open a mobile app and see if there are any other singles at the same bar that we might be interested in dating. You have so much information at your fingertips, and you can communicate via your phone. So it makes sense that daters are gravitating to their phones to connect with more people.

The study found some other interesting results:

• Seventy-eight percent of singles expect to communicate within 24 hours after a good first date. And after a good date, a majority of the men and women surveyed agree it doesn't matter who initiates the next communication.

• Don't be coy. Forty-six percent of singles have become upset with someone they are dating over their text response time, with more women (52%) getting upset than men (40%).

• Texting is the most frequent form of communication, particularly for those ages 21 to 26, who report texting several times a day before going on a date (50%), during a casual relationship (43%) and during an exclusive relationship (62%).

• 96 percent of singles keep phones out of sight during a date. But, somehow, 67% still find a way to check their phones during a date.

The study surveyed 1,500 U.S. singles between the ages of 21 and 50.

Heads up, OkCupid users: the game is about to change on everybody's favorite free dating site.

The most observant OkCupid users may have already noticed a new feature has quietly appeared on their profiles. Click on your username and a drop-down menu appears with a new option: Promote Me. For an extra $2 fee, users who want a little extra attention on the site can promote themselves to fellow OkCupidites.

The feature is so new that OkCupid hasn't even released a formal press release, but word on the street is the site plans to formalize and publicize the new addition in the next few weeks. The question is: How will the introduction of a paid promotion feature alter the otherwise very democratic experience on OkCupid?

OkCupid co-founder and president Christian Rudder promises that little will change. "The idea is that we're showing you to the same people we would over time, but in a very condensed way," he told BuzzFeed. "We still only show you to good matches (high match percentage, nearby) - not just randoms." In other words, promoted profiles will always be people you would have been matched with eventually, they're just coming sooner than they might have without the paid promotion.

So how does paid promotion work? What the $2 fee actually gets you is 10 minutes of enhanced visibility. For those 10 minutes, your promoted profile is pushed to the front of the crowd in all areas of the site, like QuickMatch and "People You Might Like." Promoted profiles are not marked in any way, making them indistinguishable from other profiles. In tests of the new feature, BuzzFeed says, OkCupid found that those 10 minutes of promoted time gave users 30 times more exposure than they would have otherwise received in the same amount of time.

The jury is out on whether OkCupid's new strategy will work. Some fear that paid promotions will clutter the site's pages with less attractive users whose profiles aren't getting any attention. Others say that the exact opposite will happen. Since attractive users find it easier to get dates, supporters say, they stand to gain the most from increased exposure and will find the feature most useful.

Whichever direction the new feature goes, Promote Me is pretty much guaranteed to be a popular addition to the site. Rudder told BuzzFeed that over 2,500 people paid to promote themselves in the first 24 hours after launch, and that was before most OkCupid members were even aware Promote Me existed.

The first Monday in September is almost upon us which means the Labor Day long weekend (or Labour Day in Canada) is just around the corner. eHarmony is celebrating this last long weekend this summer by having a free communication weekend in the United States and Canada. From August 29th to September 2nd all users can communicate with their matches for free.

Most of you know by now that eHarmony has a free communication weekend (FCW) about once a month and they usually fall around the holidays. This is the ideal time because many singles are home and close to their laptop or tablet and have the time to try out a dating service. eHarmony is extra busy on these weekends since you not only get to sign up for free and take the personality profile questionnaire at no cost, but once you receive your matches you can also communicate for free. Sending emails happens after you go through the guided communication process with one or more of your matches. This process allows you to get to know your match better in a structured way that helps to break the ice once you are able to send email messages.

FCW at eHarmony does not include photos in profiles, secure calls over your phone, or skipping the guided communication process.

For more information on this matchmaking service you can check out our posted reviews of eHarmony. This service had their last FCW a couple of weeks ago (see Story).