Relationships

If you've decided you're ready to explore the world of online dating, the prospect of having to decide what sites you're interested in joining might seem just as daunting as finding potential mates you're interested in dating.

Don't freak out. Choosing a dating site is actually a lot easier than you might think, as long as you ask yourself a few key questions while evaluating prospective sites:

Does this site fit into my budget?
Some sites are free, while others require a yearly or monthly subscription. Many of the most well known dating sites, like Match.com and eHarmony.com, charge a fee for membership, but don't assume that cost is the sole indicator of a site's quality. Free sites like PlentyOfFish.com or OkCupid.com are also very popular.

Does this site offer all of the features I want?
Are you interested in having the option to video chat? Do you want the ability to browse other people's profiles, or do you want the site to automatically match you with members it thinks you'll connect with? Do you want unlimited messaging? It's important to make sure that the sites or membership levels you choose include the features that will make online dating an enjoyable experience for you.

What kind of relationship am I looking for?
Maybe you're easing yourself back into the dating pool after a long hiatus and want to date many people casually. Maybe no-strings-attached adult dating is more your style. Maybe you're only interested in finding a serious, long-term relationship. Whatever your needs are, there's a site out there that caters to them.

Is a niche dating site right for me?
A niche site can be a great option if you're looking for a partner with very specific attributes or interests. Want to date a millionaire? Try MillionaireMatch.com. Interested in people of a specific ethnic background? InterracialMatch.com might be ideal for you. If you're vegan or vegetarian, try your luck at VeggieDate.org. There's a dating site for pretty much everything and everyone, from faith-based sites (CatholicCupid.com and JDate), to sites for specific occupations (TeachersPassions.com), to sites for animal lovers (EquestrianSingles.com). Niche dating sites narrow down your potential choices and, as an added bonus, provide an easy way to start a conversation.

Are the members of this site people I'd actually be interested in meeting?
Many dating sites charge you to contact other members, but allow you to sign up for free. Take advantage of that opportunity and browse through the profiles of other members before making a decision. Do most of the profiles appear to be real? Do you find the members attractive? Are you interested in knowing more about some of them? If you're unable to find anyone that intrigues you, move on to the next site.

Is the site reviewed positively?
There's no better way to get to know a site than reading other members' opinions of it. And as you might have guessed, the perfect place to start your search is right here, at DatingSitesReviews.com!

You joined a dating website, searched through dozens of profiles, and sent out numerous emails to make contact with women or men who interest you. The problem is, people aren't responding. You may be wondering what's going on. If they aren't even going to respond to an email, why are they bothering to join a dating website?

There are several things that could be happening, so take heart and don't get frustrated:

• It's possible that the people you are reaching out to are no longer subscribers or active on the site. Many sites don't purge their profile database on a regular basis, including the larger sites, because it's more enticing for daters to have more rather than less people to choose from.

• Some people send mass emails (men are especially guilty of this), and so this makes it harder for women to go through several emails to find yours. It's better to send personalized emails, mentioning something specific about her profile.

• Some women and men get dozens of emails every day. If they aren't logging in to read these on a regular basis, they might not have time to sift through all of them. (Many people get busy with work and let their online dating searches slide.) Again, personalizing is best to capture attention. Make sure your subject line mentions something specific from their profile.

• Make sure your grammar and spelling are accurate. Though we live in an age of text messages, people still prefer their emails to read like letters. Use complete sentences and spell words correctly and fully. Don't abbreviate or use acronyms if you can help it.

• Don't send emails that consist of one sentence, like "Hey, what's up?". If you want someone to respond, you have to engage them. Again, personalizing is key. If you discover from his profile that he likes windsurfing, mention your experience with it or ask a question about it. The more you make your email engaging to the specific person you send it to, the better your results.

It's time for a quiz!

Are you:

• Burned out on the over-priced drinks and drunken hook-up culture of the nightlife scene?
• So busy that your schedule hardly allows you time for eating, sleeping, and life's other necessities - and definitely doesn't allow you time for anything else?
• Concerned about the toll traditional dinner-and-a-movie dates are taking on your wallet?
• Sick and tired of never meeting people with similar interests, hobbies, and goals?

If you answered "yes" to one or more of those questions, it may be time to try online dating. In the first part of this series, "5 Reasons Online Dating Might Be Right For You," I told you about a few of the ways online dating can be superior to conventional dating. I'm sure some of you joined a dating site right away, but others are probably still skeptical, unsure if embracing the Internet can really change your love life's luck.

To the cynics, I present 5 more reasons online dating might be right for you:

1) The playing field is completely level. If you're the kind of person who uses excuses like "He's too good-looking for me" or "She's surrounded by too many people already" to keep yourself from approaching strangers, it's time to consider online dating. Almost everyone on a dating site is there because they want to meet new people, so you don't have to stress yourself out wondering if you should say "Hi" to someone who has caught your eye - the answer is always a resounding "YES!"

2) You can showcase your personality. Offline, most people are attracted to a person's looks before anything else. While there's nothing wrong with finding someone's physical appearance appealing, dating online offers the opportunity display all of your other great features to potential suitors first, allowing you to weed out bad matches immediately and find stronger, deeper connections more quickly.

3) You can set the pace. When meeting in person, there can be a lot of pressure to move things forward more quickly than you're comfortable with. On a dating site, however, you can send and respond to messages as swiftly or as slowly as you want, and can take as much time as you need to plot your next move or think up the perfect opening line that will make your future mate fall in love with you instantly.

4) There's no confrontation. Most of us are terrified of rejection. And who wouldn't be? It's depressing and discouraging to have someone you're attracted to look you in the eyes and tell you they're not interested in you, and it can be equally uncomfortable to tell someone else that you're not interested in them. Dating online can't eliminate rejection completely, but the lack of face-to-face contact can make a painful process a lot more bearable.

5) Selection. Online dating sites allow you to browse through profiles of potential matches located anywhere in the world, unlike traditional dating which only allows you to meet people who live nearby. If that doesn't drastically increase your odds of finding The One, I don't know what does!

So what are you waiting for, cynics? Love is waiting just around the technological corner.

Although online dating is extremely convenient in many ways, it also adds the complex problem of reading tone and intention through text. How is it possible to read the subtlety of an email without the added dimension of body language? Through the specific body language of text.

Text has its own secret language of nuances that allow you to read into what your potential match is thinking. Here are some examples:

What kind of language does he/she use? Are your exchanges well-thought out or written in chat-speak (“omg,” “lol,” “jk,” and “btw” are all examples of chat-speak)? The type of language he/she uses may give some indication of the level of seriousness they’re taking to the dating scene. Someone who wants to be taken seriously writes seriously. So if you’re looking for a long-term relationship and your match responds with a series of acronyms, you may have different dating goals.

How fast does he/she respond? A series of rapid exchanges fired across digital space will probably indicate a strong connection. When like-minded people come into contact with each other, it is often fiery and intense, sparking immediate interest and attention. So if you find yourself running to your computer to check your inbox, eager for that next missive, you can probably guess that your partner is doing the same thing. If, on the other hand, the person with whom you’re writing doesn’t respond for weeks and weeks, it indicates either one of two possibilities: 1.) a lack of real interest in dating or 2.) a busy schedule, which in itself could be a deal breaker if you’d like to date someone with more free time.

What are your emails like? Are they largely one-sided, or does your partner engage and ask you questions as well? If your partner pays attention to the details of your email, it is likely than he/she will be equally, if not more, engaged with you once you start real-time dating.

How does he/she respond to your questions? Does he/she give well-thought out answers, expressing genuine consideration for your questions, or does he/she seem evasive or hard to engage? If the person with whom you’re writing opens up and shares his/her life with you, a level of implicit trust is evident, meaning that they’re genuinely interested in you and want you to be interested, as well.

After getting your dose of Saturday Night Live, you can turn in for a new twist on the matchmaking game. The show “Match Off” pits two matchmaking experts against one another, with each episode featuring one dating contestant. The experts will offer advice to fix a love life that has yet to result in a perfect match. The catch? If they’re successful (or if ONE of them is successful), the week’s dating contestant will be poised to find love.

You see, only ONE of the two dating/matchmaking experts will be awarded the Scepter of Love at the end of each week’s show.

Here’s the jist: each week, a lovelorn contestant (they’ll be both male and female) will be paired-up with two matchmaking experts. Some featured experts for upcoming shows are folks like Emily Fry of In Good Company, Jen Moeller of Eight at Eight, Rachel Canis and Adam Fendelman (both of Best Foot Forward) and PJ Osgood of It’s Just Lunch. The race is then on for the two competing matchmakers to find the contestant Mr. or Mrs. Right! The matchmaker deemed to have given the best advice by the contestant wins the Scepter of Love.

Note: Unfortunately the source to the video and/or image which once was displayed here has since been removed by the authors for an unknown reason.

Find someone love, win a stick. That, and get your matchmaking service pimped on network television, I guess. I’m interested to see how the series pans-out. While I don’t think true love can be found in a half hour reality show, it will definitely have its train wrecks and shocker moments. For the love-seeking’s sake, I hope these matchmakers are more spot-on than off and actually help them make adjustments that will compliment their dating lives for the long-term and not just for the sake of ratings.

Visit NBC to read more about Match Off.

Over 50 million people are logging on to look for love - are you?

That number alone should provide enough incentive to venture into the world of online dating, but if you're still not convinced, here are 5 reasons online dating might be right for you:

1) There is no longer a stigma attached to finding love online. There was a time when people assumed that anyone using the Internet to find dates was unattractive, extremely desperate, and potentially psychotic. Newsflash: this is the 21^st century, and online dating is now considered just as legitimate as meeting The One offline.

2) It's relatively inexpensive. The cost of dinners, movies, flowers, drinks, and chocolates adds up over time - and in the midst of a recession, conventional dating might not fit into your budget anymore! Fortunately, with the proliferation of free and low-fee sites, online dating can be an affordable alternative.

3) It's convenient. Are you a busy professional with a hectic schedule? Meet potential matches during your lunch break, or during any other spare moment you might find. Sick? Having a bad hair day? Still wearing your pajamas at 3 o'clock in the afternoon? No problem! Online dating allows you to interact with prospective partners from anywhere, at any time, and in any condition.

4) You're shy. If you're introverted, socially awkward, or break out in a cold sweat just from thinking about approaching someone you're attracted to, online dating is just what the doctor ordered. Profiles allow you to start the getting-to-know-you process from the comfort of your home or office, significantly reducing the anxiety that many feel in social situations. Making the first move by sending an e-mail or clicking a button that says "Flirt" probably feels less stressful than having to say "Hi!" to a complete stranger, but it accomplishes the same goal.

5) Targeted searches. Finding a match using traditional dating methods is based entirely on good luck. Maybe you're only interested in women over 5'8", with a certain color eyes, and who enjoy a specific hobby, or maybe you only want a man who is from Northern California, has brown hair, likes to cook, and speaks Japanese. What are the odds that you'll stumble upon the ideal mate in a grocery store, on the dancefloor, or in your favorite park? Unless you have some seriously good karma, it's probably pretty unlikely. Enter online dating, stage left. Internet dating sites allow you to make your searches as broad or as specific as you'd like, increasing your chances that you'll find someone you're truly interested in.

Online dating has become a way of life for millions of people across the globe and I'm confident that love can be found online, but if you still have your doubts, check out part two of this series - "5 More Reasons Online Dating Might Be Right For You" - for more information on why the Internet might be the perfect place to find your perfect match.