Relationships

Tired of swiping endlessly? If you’re looking for forward movement in your dating life, then the New Year is a good time to check your habits when it comes to online dating, and see where you can change things up a bit. There’s nothing like ringing in the New Year with a new attitude towards love!

Let’s start with perceptions. Most people think that dating apps are easy tools for hooking up, but not much else. While they are convenient, many people using dating apps are also looking for long-term love, just like you. Don’t make assumptions about why others on using dating apps – it’s important to keep an open mind, otherwise dating is nothing more than an exercise in handling frustration.

Following are some tips for the New Year on how to get a better handle on those dating apps:

Join something new – but do your research first! Most people join Tinder because that’s the app they know, without realizing there are a slew of dating apps out there catering to every type of dater. If you know you want something serious, try eHarmony or even Coffee Meets Bagel (for a little less pressure) instead. If you are looking to find dates with similar religious leanings, try JSwipe for Jewish singles or Collide, which labels itself the “Christian Tinder.” If you are looking for Star Wars fans? Try AYI (Are You Interested?) – which matches up people with similar interests.

Update your photos. Let’s face it – dating is visually-driven, so you have to put your best face forward. Instead of posing in a slew of selfies, have a friend take some more interesting photos – you playing guitar, doing a yoga pose or out hiking, for instance. Then visually you can show potential dates who you are – it is more effective than listing your hobbies in a description.

Get to the date. Instead of the endless messaging back and forth, it’s much more efficient to ask your matches out right away. You can’t tell if there will be chemistry until you meet in person, so why drag things out and get invested in an online fantasy? If you’re a woman, do your share of the asking. It’s 2015 – and he will be fine with it.

Be mindful and courteous. Just because someone is on a dating site doesn’t mean they are DTF. Don’t send messages suggesting otherwise. Ask someone out to a public place, not your apartment to “Netflix and chill.” Treat others respectfully, and they will return the favor.

Say “yes” more often, ladies. Some guys accept all matches in the hopes of bettering their chances to meet someone. Women are the opposite: the accept very few, sometimes to their detriment. Remember, keep an open mind. Just because he isn’t exactly what you want on paper – you might have chemistry together IRL. Give everyone a fair shot.

Happy dating in the New Year!

For half a decade, Match.com has celebrated dating with America’s most comprehensive study on singles. This year's annual analysis surveyed 5,600 singles from all ages, ethnicities, incomes and walks of life. What it found is a new dating landscape that's laying tired stereotypes to rest.

The days of macho men and dependent women are history. Men are increasingly seeking out independent female partners and women are setting the tone in relationships. The 'Singles in America' study calls it “The Clooney Effect.” According to the study, the majority of single women in 2015:

• Want a partner with a sense of independence (89%)
• Want a partner with the same level of intelligence (86%)
• Think it's ok to casually date more than one person at a time (74%)
• Are not willing to support a partner financially (55%)
• Seek a partner who's comfortable with their sexuality (94%)
• Would not likely date someone who's less intellectual (61%)

If honesty is the best policy, is there an optimal time to divulge your most personal information?

Even at the best of times, “The Talk” can be a touchy subject. Maybe you want to date exclusively. Maybe you have wedding bells on the brain. Maybe you're just ready to disclose a weird hobby or an annoying habit.

Whatever talk you're ready to have, it's a sensitive situation and tricky to get the timing right. To shed some light on the murky topic, online dating site Zoosk polled more than 5,000 users to get their thoughts on having uncomfortable relationship conversations.

The big question on most daters' minds is this: when is it ok to define the relationship as exclusive or nonexclusive? According to Zoosk's survey, almost half of men believe it's important to define the relationship within the first few dates. Only a third of women agreed. Forty-nine percent of female users wanted to wait until after the first few months of dating to discuss exclusivity.

As far bigger commitments go, 56% of men and 54% of women consider six months an appropriate time to talk about marriage. Note: the marriage talk in question isn't about marrying each other or picking out color schemes. This conversation is just about whether you aspire to get married at all.

Zoosk also asked users about disclosures earlier in the dating process. Their research found that response rates to the first online dating message increase if the following words are used: vegan, pets, allergies. On the other hand, response rates decrease with the appearance of these words: vegetarian, virgin, rich.

In that initial communication, more men (32%) than women (28%) say they would disclose if there was something unusual about them sexually. However, the majority of men (52%) and a significant number of women (41%) say they would prefer to remain in the dark about their date's number of past sexual partners.

On or immediately following the first date, 70% of men say they would be upfront if they are seeing other people. Sixty-two percent of women say they would do the same. Past partners, on the other hand, are a subject better saved for later dates. Nearly half of men and women say they do want to discuss former relationships and recent breakups, but only after a few weeks of dating.

For more about this dating service please read our review of Zoosk.

Believing that you can’t meet and attract beautiful women as an introvert is one of the biggest mistakes you can possibly make.

Okay, I get it. You are told that you have to be the outgoing alpha in order to succeed with the ladies. You are told that women are attracted to extroverted guys.

Well, what if everything you have been told is nothing but a big fat lie?

The belief that only the extroverted, loud and social guys can succeed in the dating game is the result of a big misconception when it comes to the definition of introversion. Unfortunately, a lot of people believe that introverts are naturally insecure, socially awkward and really weird communication partners.

Well, this couldn’t be farther from the truth. I am an introvert and one of the qualities that my friends appreciate so much about me is my ability to listen and to allow deep conversations. What most men don’t realize is that the only difference between an introvert and an extrovert is the fact that the introvert charges his batteries when he is on his own and the extroverts derives energy from being around other people.

Were you wondering who the most popular members were on Match.com this past year? Or maybe you were wondering the percentage of blonde to brunette daters, or what music most matches were listening to? Whatever your question, Match.com seems to have answers in their 2015 wrap-up.

If you dwell in New York City, you might be surprised to learn that despite the hectic pace and its legendary status for casual relationships and ambitious and independent singles (thanks to tv shows like Girls and Sex and the City), New York City is the number one place where Match.com members want kids! Commitment and family in New York City is possible and a goal for a lot of daters, so lesson learned here: don’t let the stereotypes rule your life.

If on the other hand, you are looking for the jet set life and want to be with a doctor or lawyer, head to Durham, North Carolina or Washington, D.C. respectively.

It also appears that despite the tech-savvy iPhone users among us, Android users are becoming more likely to try online dating. In 2015, 29% more Android users joined Match.com vs. iPhone users.

This past year marked a big year for the LGBT community, with the Supreme Court ruling that marriage between same-sex couples was legal across the country. Plus, notable celebrity and former Olympic Champion Caitlyn Jenner came out to the world, making transgender rights a topic of discussion. In the online dating world, half a million members of the LGBT community joined Match in 2015.

Following are some additional highlights:

• Since we are in for a long year of political maneuvering in 2016, Match.com decided to see the Hilarys vs. the Donalds who signed up for online dating this past year. As it turns out, there are more Donalds who are members of Match. (We’ll see how this plays out in the elections.)
• Game of Thrones was the most-mentioned TV show on Match this year. (No big surprise – though fans of The Walking Dead will be pleased their show came in second.)
• The most-mentioned celebrities included Drake at #1, Taylor Swift, Beyonce and then the Kardashians.
• The most mentioned trendy words of 2015 were “swag” (coming in at #1), “bae” (because who doesn’t want to find their bae?), and “Netflix and chill” (to which I can relate).
• Most trending newsworthy topics discussed on Match include transgender, Donald Trump, and marijuana. 
• The most popular foods mentioned were sushi (coming in at #1), tacos and ramen. Delicious.
• Two times more brunettes joined than blondes.
• Last but not least, Match revealed its two most popular daters – Leonora from New York, NY and Gabriel from Los Angeles.

To find out more about this dating service you can read our review of Match.com. Happy dating!

It’s that time of year – the decorations and lights are up, people are rushing around to catch the sales, and extra glasses of bubbly are being poured in festive cheer. Not to mention all the happy couples, who seem to be everywhere and doing romantic things like ice skating and warming up together by a nice fire.

Instead of running in the other direction or shutting yourself off from social events this holiday season because you don’t have someone to go with, it’s time to pull out that pair of red heels and start meeting new people. And having some fun.

The holidays are the best time to socialize, especially if you’re single. Between happy hours, office holiday parties, and friends inviting you to their holiday festivities, there’s much more of a chance to meet someone new. (Bonus: you don’t have to use Tinder, either.)

Following are 5 tips for a fun holiday season – and to meeting more people:

Accept all invitations. Even to that boring networking mixer or Aunt Sally’s potluck dinner. During the holiday season, more people attend social events than at other times of the year, so those invitations you try to avoid might actually be more fun than you think. You never know who might show up.

Invite your friends (if you can). Maybe your best pal is not romantically your type, but you have fun hanging out together. This is a good time of year to make plans and bring him to parties with you. This expands both of your social circles, and therefore both of your options of meeting more people.

If not, be brave and go solo. It might seem intimidating to go to a party alone, especially if you think it will be filled with couples. Instead of avoiding dinner parties and other couple-ly events, dress up and put yourself out there. You never know who your friends might have invited, or who they could set you up with in the future. There’s nothing more attractive than a woman or man confidently walking up to strangers to strike up conversation.

Do something you enjoy, just because. Do you like to make hot chocolate with a shot of whiskey for your friends? Do you like decorating a Christmas tree, volunteering your time to a local food bank, or binge watching your favorite TV series while you bake cookies? Do it. There’s no time like the present. It will also put you in a good frame of mind for all the holiday stress ahead.

Spend time with the people you love – and like. The holidays are about being thankful for the people in your life who bring you happiness, joy, or even a good shoulder to cry on. These are the people to hang with this holiday season. It’s really about having fun and sharing experiences with the people you love, romantic or not. It puts you in a great frame of mind for when you do happen to be out and meet someone who catches your attention.