Types (Niche)

That's the question posed by Cliff Lerner, founder and CEO of SNAP Interactive, in a recent article on HuffPost.

Personally I like to think we've already decided that online dating is cool, but maybe I'm just trying to make myself feel better. Maybe the rest of the world isn't as on-board with the idea as the social and professional circles I run in. For those people, Lerner says, the launch of Graph Search could make all the difference.

When Graph Search was announced, online dating sites went a little bit insane. Some feared that because it could meaningfully connect singles through friends and common interests, it would mean the end of traditional dating sites. It even includes the option to search by "relationship status," making it clear that dating is a key element of the new feature.

"The concern," Lerner explains, "is that singles will gravitate more and more towards Facebook for their online dating needs since Facebook already has superior data and profiles and now is offering enhanced friend and interest-based search and matching functionality for singles."

But fear not, online dating sites, because Lerner also says that line of thinking "couldn't be more wrong."

Facebook's Graph Search could be a valuable opportunity for dating sites. Currently only 1 in 5 singles visit a dating site each month, and the biggest opportunity dating sites have for growth is to crush the stigma associated with them once and for all. The best way to get that remaining 80% of singles to log onto online dating sites is to make it seem as normal as possible.

Enter Graph Search, which subtly blends online dating functionality into the Facebook experience. With the addition of "social dating" to Facebook, a brand new crop of singles is being introduced to online dating in an understated, but effective, way. And once they get a taste of what it has to offer, there's a good chance they'll turn to online dating sites to get more out of the experience.

Voila - Facebook Graph Search might actually be doing the online dating industry a favor, not driving a nail into its figurative coffin.

"It's only a matter of time before the online dating industry says a huge "thank you" to Facebook for removing the online dating 'stigma,'" writes Lerner, "and thus enabling millions of more singles to enter the 'online dating' market, which will ultimately expose many new millions of singles to destination dating sites."

In a move that will probably surprise no one, Facebook proposed updates to its Data Use Policy and Statement of Rights and Responsibilities for the millionth time.

In another move that will probably surprise no one, most users probably aren't even aware of Facebook's proposed changes.

And in a move that might actually surprise a few of you, Facebook allowed users to comment on the proposed changes and, after the commenting period closed, decided to delay the update as it deals with criticisms from privacy groups.

What? Facebook is being thoughtful, acting concerned about privacy, and taking others' feelings into account? Who are you and what have you done with Facebook?

Seriously, though, it's awesome that Facebook maybe cares a little bit about what its users actually think. Their announcement of the updates said that both the Data Use Policy and Statement of Rights and Responsibilities would receive new language that clarifies:

• How advertising works on Facebook
• What to expect when it comes to using your name, profile picture, content and personal info with ads or commercial content
• How to control or remove apps you've used
• What data you're sharing with mobile devices

The proposed updates were met with resistance from privacy groups, who asked the FTC to prevent Facebook from enacting the changes over concerns about how the social networking site handles user information for advertising. According to these groups, the new policy makes it easier for Facebook to use the data of its members for advertising without their consent.

"The Federal Trade Commission must act now to protect the interests of Facebook users," said a letter sent to the FTC and signed by officials from six groups, including the Electronic Privacy Information Center. "The right of a person to control the use of their image for commercial purposes is the cornerstone of modern privacy law."

The proposed new Data Use Policy states that Facebook will use the personal information supplied by users to provide more relevant advertisements. Unlike the previous Data Use Policy, which says "We do not share any of your information with advertisers (unless, of course, you give us permission)," the new policy says nothing about permission ("...we may use all the information we receive about you to serve ads that are more relevant to you."). It's a small change in language that means an awful lot.

Privacy groups now fear that actively giving permission is a thing of the past and that by using Facebook, your permission is automatically assumed. The real issue here is that companies like Facebook need to communicate in simple, plain language about how they handle users' data. Until that transparency is achieved, we have a long way to go.

Are you overwhelmed with all of the dating apps out there? It seems there are new ways of meeting people via technology cropping up every day. So what do you do with all the choices, especially if you're not so interested in playing a game of "hot or not" over an app like Tinder?

There's no need to worry. Technology can be used to your advantage, to help you meet more people than you'd otherwise run into going out to bars or parties. And don't forget - texting and social media can also help you improve your dating game.

Following are some ways to use technology to improve your social life:

Keep in touch via text. Did you meet someone incredible, or have an amazing first date? Don't let that spark fade - your mobile phone could be your best resource for keeping the romance going. Don't be afraid to send a text - but don't be generic by asking "how's your day?" Be creative. Make a reference to something you both said or did. Or send a photo of a place you talked about. This helps keep the conversation going, and provides a way to connect until the next time you see each other.

Check in on FourSquare, Yelp, or Facebook. In addition to getting deals from the restaurant or bar where you check in, you'll also let potential dates in your circles know where you like to hang out on weekends and evenings. Maybe you have the same places in common but didn't know it.

Use your online dating site's app. Signed up for Match.com or eHarmony? If you like these tried and true online dating sites, then download their apps, too. Because we are more mobile and carry our phones with us, daters can miss out on opportunities when they wait to check online matches at home or work. If you're staying engaged with matches through your phone, likely those opportunities for spontaneous coffee dates won't elude you. You never know.

Know what you're comfortable with, (and learn about what's out there). Apps like Grindr and Tinder can be daunting, especially if you're a single woman who doesn't want to be so accessible to strangers. But there are plenty of other dating apps that are more security-friendly. It's hard to fake a profile if you have to sign up with your Facebook account or verify with your mobile number. Apps like CoffeeMeetsBagel only provide one match per day, so you can rest assured people won't be trolling. Be open to learning what's out there and trying something new.

I'm twenty-quietly-mumbles-a-second-number, so I'm practically bound by law to try out every new app that hits the market. Tinder still seems to be the big one taking the Millennials by storm, but the latest mobile dating experiment to cross my path is GOWiNGiNG, an iOS app that calls itself "the double dating app for everyone."

Ok, I'll bite. Why not?

GOWiNGiNG officially launched in the iTunes store last month, and claims to be the "first mobile/social double-dating app of its kind." I have a hard time believing that, but whatever...I'll go with it. The point is obvious: meet new people without the pressure and awkwardness that usually comes with meeting strangers.

Users can invite their friends to download the app for free and become their WingMen or WingGirls via Facebook or email. If they're more interested in meeting new people (or just don't have any friends), users can also use the app itself to find a WingMan or WingGirl. They can then search for local men or women to take on dates together with their newly-acquired wing. Even those who are already in relationships can take advantage of the app, by using it to find other couples who are looking for double dates.

Here's what the founder, Robert Jaggers, has to say: "I've found that there are so many people who really want to take advantage of dating websites and meetup app technology, but they're a little leery of going out on solo dates with a stranger. That's understandable, and that's why I created GOWiNGiNG. It's a more social, less intimidating and more fun way to date, and it's ideal for anyone who's shy or anyone who just knows they really shine when they have their best friend around."

I can get on board with that. What I can't get on board with is the ridiculous stylization of the name: GOWiNGiNG. Was that awful capitalization really necessary? Does it somehow get the point across better than "GoWinging" would have? I seriously doubt it.

I can't say I find the site much more appealing, either. The cheesy stock photos are not doing it for me, nor is the equally-cheesy logo that looks like it was nabbed directly from a wannabe pickup artist's website.

I hate to judge a book by its cover, because for all I know the app is great, but as an Android user that's all I have to go by at this point. And my hunch is that Grouper and Tandem are doing the group meetup thing way better.

Are you looking for something a little different when it comes to meeting new people? In New York, there's a new twist on the coffee date that you might want to try.

Instead of asking one of your online matches to meet over a cup of coffee, what if you just cut to the chase and met potential dates directly through your local barista? Nancy Slotnik believes a more personal touch is needed when it comes to meeting potential romantic partners, and so she founded Matchmaker Café in New York.

Single customers are invited to drop by her pop-up café in the Financial District and check in with the barista, who also acts as the matchmaker. If you're interested in meeting people, the barista takes your picture and adds it to her database.

It's not exactly hand-picked matchmaking though. The matches are made with the help of technology, not a yenta. Matchmaker Café provides a database and an app to help you sift through your choices, which isn't such a personal touch. But what else would you do as you drink your coffee before your 9am meeting?

Customers have a number of ways of browsing the database of potential coffee date matches. You can subscribe to Matchmaker Café's online app, which launched last November and offers in-person introductions by a matchmaker. (Information for your dating profile is pulled from your Facebook account.) There are currently about 3,000 members. If you're feeling really motivated, you can also pay $5 for three phone introductions or $10 for ten, until the pop-up café closes on Labour Day.

According to Slotnick, the idea is to connect locals with each other and get them offline and meeting face to face, even if it's just for a brief coffee.

Considering all of the mobile dating apps available to meet people nearby, this is another interesting concept to get singles in the same area, who stop by the same neighborhood cafes and pubs, to meet each other face to face. Not many people know their neighbors as well as they know the people in their Twitter feeds. Maybe pop-up concepts like Matchmaker Café can help to change that.

This isn't Slotnick's first attempt at matchmaking via coffee. In 1996, she founded Drip Café, which let customers sift through binders of dating profiles. If a guest found someone he or she wanted to meet, then for a small fee, the café would help arrange a meeting.

People have mixed reactions to the café, but it is getting a lot of buzz and already has gained a following. Would you visit a pop-up café like this one?

New surveys from married dating site (what a nice way to put it) AshleyMadison.com have revealed what cheaters really want.

In a surprise twist, the answer is not just "some extra-marital action." Nope, it turns out that Ashley Madison's unfaithful clientele is actually looking for a very specific kind of extracurricular experience.

When it comes to infidelity, it's all about class.

• 83.1% of middle-class male Ashley Madison members want to cheat with a working-class woman.
• 51.8% of upper-class men are looking for a middle-class woman.
• 42.4% of upper-class men are seeking a working class-woman for an affair.

"Despite the changing socio-economic landscape, men across the board still want to be the Alpha partner in a relationship," says Noel Biderman, Ashley Madison founder and CEO. "Men want someone to admire and look up to them, someone they can impress because fundamentally most men lack confidence."

For women, it's a different story.

• 7% of female Ashley Madison members who describe themselves as 'working class' say they are looking for an upper class affair partner.

"This is a reflection of economic hard times as much as confirmation of traditional class stereotypes," Biderman offers by way of explanation. "For women who are struggling financially...a fling with an upper-class man represents glamour and escape, a holiday from daily life, perhaps an element of security."

Middle class women are in a class of their own.

• Only 40.7% of middle-class women on the site say they would prefer an affair with an upper-class man.
• 53.6% specified that they would prefer to philander within the middle class.

Biderman has the following words of wisdom to offer on women of the middle class: "Middle-class women are more likely to be financially independent and better educated, their needs are different. They want intimacy and shared experience with an equal rather than to be swept off their feet, Jane Austen style."

There's no word on what upper class women want because...I guess they don't exist? Is that what Noel Biderman is trying to tell me? Is this the "Women earn 70 cents for every dollar a man earns" thing at play? None of us make enough money to be considered upper class cheaters?

The wage gap at work, folks. Someone had better sort out the equal pay for women issue stat, so we can get in on the upper crust infidelity action too!