How Do I Choose an Online Dating Site?

Advice
  • Thursday, May 08 2014 @ 06:59 am
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Many singles have tried at least one online dating site. Some have found success right away while others get frustrated and wonder why they decided to try online dating in the first place. Unfortunately, many people don’t know all of the options available, or one dating site might work better for them than another.

There is a lot of competition among online dating sites, but most people flock to the few they know, like Match.com. But it’s important to first ask yourself before you sign up: what do I want out of my dating experience?

People date for different reasons, and the same goes for online dating. Not every member is interested in finding a long-term relationship. So it’s good to ask yourself if you just want to date and have fun, or if you’re looking to meet someone special and settle down. Your intention is an important part of your dating experience.

Next, you have to know yourself. Are you very shy? Are you more at ease on a date where you’re doing something together rather than sitting across the table from each other? Or are you really confident and slightly intimidating? Do you know what you want and you’re not afraid to say it?

People date differently – some go into it like a job interview, asking questions and checking boxes off of their “must-haves” list. People place importance on different things – like religious beliefs, career, location, or even how close you are with your family. Others are a little less choosy, and go from date to date unsure of what they want but recognizing that they aren’t meeting the “right one.”

This is why it’s important to ask yourself these questions. From there, you can try a few different dating sites to see what’s right for you.

If you’re looking for a serious relationship, then eHarmony or Chemistry are your best bet. They have a significant number of members to choose from, and you have to go through a pretty rigorous and time-consuming sign-up process before you can search through matches. So from the start, people on the site are a little more serious than your average online dater. But I would also suggest Christian Mingle or a niche dating site if you have particular beliefs that are most important to you when looking for a partner. Again: know yourself and what you want.

If you’re looking to dip your toe back in the dating pool after a long absence, but aren’t sure if you want a long-term relationship, then sites like Match and OkCupid are a little less intense than the relationship-focused sites. They also have a large subscriber base and so you can meet a variety of people. Keep your options open if you’re unsure. Date outside of your “type.”

I suggest trying two or three sites and seeing which format you like best. Most sites offer a free trial period so you can at least set up a profile and check matches. It’s worth the time to really look and see what’s right for you.