OkCupid

Have you been told to keep your shirt on/button it up/have someone else take your photo/look away from the camera?

In all of the instances above, OKCupid is shutting you down. The popular online dating site decided to dig into its members' profile pictures and see if there was a story to be told. Indeed, there was, but certainly not the story the folks at OKCupid expected. The study's data covers 18 to 31-year-old only and reviewed over 7,000 photographs to come to a few conclusions. Grab a coffee (and maybe a note pad) so you can soak-up everything OKCupid shares and maybe make some meaningful changes to your own online dating profile.

Smiling is Good, but There's Something Better

We all get that smiling is the key for any happy photo, but OKCupid discovered that there's one more thing that takes a smiling photo to the next level: the flirty look. The ideal look for profile pictures that work is a smiling, flirty face looking directly into the camera...for ladies. Eye contact is important and enhances a woman's attractiveness, while the flirty look seems to send things over the top. On the contrary, men were found to be most attractive in photos where they look away from the camera and do not smile.

Self-Portraits Sell

Who knew that the "MySpace" style profile picture would be successful? Certainly not OKCupid. But according to their study, these pictures pull more weight than one might think. The self-shot photos for both men and women garnered more bites (new contacts) per month than regular photos taken by someone else. They initially thought these surprising results (for women, at least) were purely a product of self-shots being more revealing (i.e. cleavage). Then again, men don't have (or should not have) cleavage, so that was out. Perhaps it's simply a factor of self-shots being honest. They're not edited or photoshopped and you know they're probably current photos. Oh - and an interesting tidbit: guys, you can take your shirts off, but the ladies start losing interest (sharply) after they turn 19.

Beauty May Be Only Skin-Deep?

"Keep your clothes on." We ladies have heard that repeatedly when it comes to out online dating profile pictures, right? Have a seat. Get ready for convention to be challenged. OKCupid says that profiles that include a cleavage shot, regardless of the member's age, get more pings than those profiles without. Shocking! Be sure to check out the charts in this section of the report, as a woman who always thought that showing a little "down there" always meant I didn't value myself "up there," I'm going through a paradigm shift here.

But wait - the report dup a little deeper with the "cleavers." They modeled potential conversations held the keepers of the cleavage shot (in comparison to those with other types of photos and discovered...those members with "more interesting" photos were more likely to have enduring conversations (information based on the number of back and forth messages and the type of photos in a member's profile).

OK, so all may not be lost below or above the chest, but maybe a little more skin can't hurt?

OK - Show Your Face. Or Not?

We've been forever told to show our faces in our online dating profile photos. Let people see what you look like. Make sure they know it's YOU. But OKCupid discovered a very interesting tangent in their recent study: no face can be great if you give them something else to look at. An intriguing photo that's a bit quirky can beg conversation and in the long run, prove itself just as powerful as a full-face profile picture. Who knew, right? Maybe that odd little picture your friend snapped of your next or your series of self-portrait in shoe...potential online dating profile pictures, all of them!

To read the complete report, OKCupid's blog and to find out more about this dating site, read our review of OKCupid.

With OKCupid's recent media buzz over their statistic filled blog posts, it seems to have garnered them some more attention and not all of it is good. One college aged woman wrote about her experience on OKCupid and said:

Stupid, stupid Cupid. This addictive, pixelated piece of crap has robbed too much of my time; time spent reading incoherent, innuendo-ridden messages ...

She wrapped up her post by stating "Don't join OKCupid.com". Her main complaint seems to be that all the guys on the dating site just want to have sex.

Was she being fair to OKCupid? I don't think so. For one thing, I think her expectations were off, especially because of the signals she was sending out. For example, after joining OKCupid and creating a profile she states:

Then, we moved on to uploading pictures. These pictures had to be HOT. We’re talking steamy.

Just like at a club or bar if you dress hot and steamy you're going to attract a certain type of guy, online dating is no different. I'm not saying your profile photo shouldn't be attractive or even a little sexy; it's just if you dial it up too much you should realize the type of guys you are going to attract, the ones looking for a one night stand and not necessary a relationship.

To find out further details about this dating site, read our review of OKCupid.

I found an article which talks about the trouble with web traffic numbers. I have talked about this issue before but it is interesting to see it from the point for view of a large dating site like OkCupid. In January comScore reported that OKCupid had 735,000 unique visitors in January, 2010. This was an increase of about 200,000 from a year ago according to comScore. Sam Yagan, OKCupid chief executive stated that:

... comScore was significantly undercounting the site’s traffic.

For proof he gave the author of the article, Carl Bialik a Google Analytics report for OkCupid which showed almost 4.3 million unique visitors last month. This shows that comScore's estimate is off by 600 percent. All I can say is I am not surprised. Web traffic estimates from these types of traffic sites are usually way off the mark. For example our review site is vastly under estimated as well, in most cases over 4 times as much. The other statistic in which Sam Yagan mentioned was that during a normal day in February (Feb 18th I believe) they had 270,000 unique logins to their dating site. With almost a couple hundred thousand people logging in during a 24 hour period, this makes comScore's estimate of 735,000 unique visitors in a month seem laughably low.

Read more about this topic on the WSJ Blogs. To find out about this dating site, read our review of OKCupid.

If you missed installment one of this article series on OKCupid’s report on age-based dating practices, click here to read OKCupids Asks: Why Aren’t Men Into Older Women?

According to OKCupid, men are pretty much missing the boat when it comes to the women available in the dating pool. Why? Because they skew their age preferences toward women significantly younger and pay little attention to those even marginally older. Men would do much better, they say, at meeting their goals for a healthy, happy relationship if they didn’t rule out the “older woman.” OKCupid used a sample set of 100,000 female users in their study and narrowed down the case for older women into three key areas: sexuality, attitude and looks.

It’s incredible what OKCupid’s user data revealed about sexual preferences for the female population. The original post has a really cool “heat map” that shows, by sliding a slider from age 18 to 40, how female users’ sexual preferences change with age. The younger lean towards preferring sex once per week, while that preference distinctly changes as you approach and move beyond women in their 30s. (Guys – take note. No more complaints about lacking an active sex life if you’re ruling out women who may be a bit older than you!)

Older women also have healthier perspectives on sexual issues like contraception and STD testing according to the post, with older women feeling more strongly about protected sex and frequent STD testing. In a nutshell, younger females seem to want less frequent sex, do it unprotected and are less interested in regular STD testing. (Guys?)

The overall attitude of the older woman is better adjusted as well, according to OKCupid. Their member profile data indicated that women in their 40s have significantly high levels of self-confidence, are happier with their lives overall and feel that the best days of their lives are ahead of them. Now that’s a refreshing outlook, isn’t it? If you’re worried about getting marched to the altar, however, fear no more. 96% of women in their 40s are content being in a relationship that may not end in marriage, but only 62% of 18-year-old women can say the same.

The final area of comparison: looks. OKCupid cites a misconception that women become less attractive as they get older. They also rule-out those who are in long-term relationships or already married and may tend to pay less attention to their appearances. They concluded: women are equally as attractive, regardless of age. Want a real shocker? Check out the fabulous photos of actual OKCupid users at the end of the article. We think you’ll have a hard time guessing who’s the “older woman!”

Bottom line for the guys: maybe you want to take another look at your age preferences in your online dating profile. If you’re willing to pass up a great sex life with an attractive woman with a killer sense of self-confidence, well – your loss! But they’re out there and waiting – all you have to do is click. For more information on the dating site, check out our review of OkCupid.

Popular online dating website OKCupid recently dug into its member base and asked the question: why are men not seeking women of their equal age or older? According to their post-Valentine’s Day blog entry, the typical user on their site aged 22-30 states age preferences for female matches to be younger. Now, that was worth a deeper look by their staff and what they found might surprise you.

OKCupid’s user base peaks at about 7 million users aged 24 and drops significantly as age increases. This could simply be a factor of OKCupid having developed into an online dating site that caters to a younger crowd or that membership over age 30 decreases because people in those age brackets are in relationships/married. So herein lies the question that OKCupid set out to answer: why are older women on the site having a more difficult time matching-up than their male counterparts?

It all comes down to age preferences stated in the male user’s online dating profile, they say.

While the male to female user ratio on OKCupid stays fairly balanced across the age brackets, men consistently indicate in their user profiles that they prefer dating younger women. While they do indicate that they are open to older women, it’s with much narrower limits. For example: OKCupid’s average 31-year-old male user sets his age range preference for women as 22 to 35 – a full nine years younger but a mere 4 years older. And here’s the shocker – as male age increases, age preferences toward younger women skew even further. They give the example of their median 42-year-old male user typically looking for women up to fifteen years younger but only three years their senior.

Interestingly enough, when OKCupid flipped the coin, they found women to be much more tolerant of age ranges. Women on the site typically message those younger and older than themselves with equal frequency. They also become more open to dating older men after age 29 according to messaging practices tracked on the site.

So with the skew in view, where does that leave men and women in the quest to find a match when age enters the equation? Check out the second installment of this article: OKCupid Says Men Are Looking for Older Women and Just Don’t Know It. For more information on the dating site, check out our review of OkCupid.

We're back to dissect the remaining two myths in OkCupid's "4 Big Myths of Profile Pictures". While their conclusions are unquestionably food for thought, it's important to remember that OkCupid is just one dating site, with its own personality and etiquette. These results might not apply at any other dating site. Still, let's figure out the basic tips we can learn from these last two myths:

Myth 3 - Guys should keep their shirts on Though shirtless "ab shots" are somewhat of a cliché, apparently it's a cliché that works: people respond to a good set of abs. Interestingly, the effectiveness of the "ab shot" decreases with age. Unclear whether that's because the abs themselves are less impressive, or whether those who are older are looking for more than just a pretty package. Conversely, posting a cleavage shot if you're a woman can apparently help keep the messages flowing even as you age. There's no doubt that cleavage will bring you attention at any stage in life, and probably men of all ages will always appreciate a busty woman, but is it the "right" kind of attention? Considering that women tend to post more outdoor shots of themselves as they age, and respond less to the "ab shot," it sure seems like they're looking for more. A related study determined that the skin might bring attention, but actual conversations tend to occur more for people who are doing "something interesting" in their picture.

• What we can take away: If you want attention, flaunting your body will bring it - online or in the real world. It's up to you to decide if it's the kind of attention you want.

Myth 4 - Make sure your face is showing Essentially, it's okay to have a picture that doesn't clearly show your face, as long as it's an interesting photo - enticing or artistic, something that draws the viewer in regardless. This is probably an ultimate example of, "It's okay to break the rules, as long as you really know what you're doing."

• What we can take away: It's definitely a gamble to use an unusual picture. If you're new at this, it's best to stick to the simple and effective, and mix it up later.

And thus, we come to the end of the OkCupid study. Have our perceptions of online photos been dramatically altered? Maybe not - but they've certainly given us more to think about.

For part 1 of this story, read this article and for more about this dating site, read our review of OKCupid.com.