Most daters are reluctant to reach out to someone of a different race on an online dating site, but will respond if they are approached first, according to a new study.

Although we think of ourselves as a post-racial society, the study showed clearly that the vast majority of online daters prefer to initiate contact with daters who share the same ethnic background. It seems most people feel comfortable dating, or at least reaching out to people with the same ethnic background. There's no clear data yet on why, though the assumption is that people expect to have less in common with others who don't share their heritage.

The data was different however, when daters were approached by someone outside their race. They were more likely to respond because someone else had reached out and said he/she was interested - in a sense, breaking the ice. Interestingly, these daters then would reciprocate - they were more likely to search and reach out to daters outside their race in future interactions. The lesson? It pays to make the first move.

Kevin Lewis, a researcher at University of California San Diego who headed the study told the New York Daily News, "We expect that someone from a different background wouldn't be interested in us. The willingness to reciprocate may tell us more about site users' 'real' preferences than their willingness to initiate contact."

The group most likely to initiate contact outside of their own race were white males. Asian women stood out too, as they were more willing to communicate with men outside of their race than within it. Once contacted by someone from another race, their exchanges went up 238%.

The study was published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, and researched over 126,000 OkCupid users to find out about their messaging preferences when it comes to dating outside of their race. They looked at messages sent between October and December of 2010. All identifying information related to OkCupid member messages was blocked, so that researchers only saw race, gender, and the timestamp of the messages in addition to the content.

Even though interracial marriages have increased significantly over the last 30 years according to the latest Pew research, with one in twelve marriages being mixed-race, we haven't known much about the behaviors and preferences of online daters and how many of them are open to dating outside of their race. This has been the first study to give insight to the early stages of a relationship in terms of race.

Most people are still calling Tinder the future of dating. But behind the scenes, Tinder is already looking at a future beyond the dating world.

At Disrupt Europe, Sean Rad, founder and CEO of the mobile dating app, acknowledged that the "unwritten context" of Tinder in its current form is romantic relationships, but he added that Tinder's foundational function - connecting two people when they express mutual interest in each other - is "a universal thing across friendships, across business, across anything." With that in mind, his goal is to turn Tinder into the solution for "every single problem you have when it comes to making a new relationship."

Wow. Someone might need to take his ego down a notch.

I'm kidding, of course, but there's no denying that goal is lofty. Is it too much of a stretch, or just the amount of stretch the industry needs?

Rad believes that the impact of social networks has been to allow users to improve existing relationships. Where they fall short is in making it easier to meet new people. Interactions on social networking sites and online dating sites have developed a "hunter/hunted" dynamic, he argues, in which hunters feel they have to hunt more aggressively and those who are hunted feel increasingly uncomfortable. That's no way to begin a relationship.

Rad hinted that Tinder may be facing a future in which it is more closely tied to real-world locations. Eventually, he said, users should be able to spot someone they want to meet in the same room and indicate their interest in connecting right then and there. That rapid-fire approach to introductions also brings up the question of superficiality, which Tinder is often accused of encouraging. Rad addressed the issue by saying it's something humans do anyway, and that at least while using Tinder, people have the opportunity to choose the optimal picture to "express themselves." He even went so far as to call Tinder less superficial than our everyday lives.

When questioned about Tinder's business model, Rad said the team is currently focused on product and user growth. They're also reviewing potential revenue options, including in-app purchases. The app sees 3.5 million matches and 350 million swipes per day (about 30% of which are swipes to the right that indicate interest). Over the course of its lifetime, the app has seen 30 billion swipes and 300 million matches total. Given Tinder's massive growth, it's unlikely the app will have trouble making money when it finally decides to take the plunge.

By now, many of us are familiar with The Rules, a dating guide written several years ago that became the standard for women who wanted to "capture" a man. One of the main points made in the book is that women tend to make themselves too available, and the big secret to landing the man of your dreams is playing hard to get.

While we might have moved on from this advice in theory, many female daters still adhere to the "play hard to get" mantra, even subconsciously. Instead of letting a man know she's interested, some women play it cool and wait for the man to move the relationship forward. While women are willing to have sex, they are not so willing to share their feelings or let a man know they are falling in love.

After all, men don't want a woman who is too needy or relies on the relationship. He wants her to be mysterious, independent, and elusive. As soon as she admits her feelings, then he'll get scared and want somebody new. At least, this is the thinking behind the behavior.

While some guys enjoy playing a game of chase when they pursue a woman, many get incredibly frustrated. They don't know if she's really interested, and get tired of guessing. What are her intentions? Does she just want him to spend money on her, or does she really like him? Is she ready to get serious, or is he just a distraction from her ex boyfriend?

Sometimes we might not like to admit to ourselves that we've played games in our love lives. Have there been times when you dated a man you weren't all that interested in because you were lonely, or because he romantically pursued you? Or were there other times when you fell hard for him but refused to tell him how you felt? Instead, you opted for being fun, unattached, and sexy, hoping he'd want to "capture" you?

Did your relationship last? Were you happy and fulfilled? Likely not. When we play games, we're not being true to ourselves, and make it even harder to find love. After all, falling in love requires both people to be vulnerable, to be willing to get hurt. When you're playing games, you're essentially communicating that you don't want to get hurt. You just want to escape unscathed.

So the next time you're falling for a guy you met, or wondering what he's thinking, instead of playing games or trying to figure him out, try being honest. The worst that can happen is that he doesn't feel the same, and that's okay. Better to know sooner than later and move on to someone who reciprocates your feelings.

The number of Americans using Internet dating services has tripled over the last five years, says a detailed new survey by the Pew Internet Project. Based on interviews with 2,252 American adults, the survey also found a few ways in which dating in the Internet age differs for men and women.

Undesirable contact and outright harassment are considerably bigger issues for women who date online. 42% of female survey respondents say they've been subjected to unwanted approaches, compared to only 17% of men who say the same. The same goes for social networking sites, where 33% of women and only 19% of men say they've blocked someone who was making them feel uncomfortable.

Though those differences aren't insignificant, both sexes also have plenty in common. Men and women have similar success rates when dating online. 22% of online daters, regardless of gender, say they found a long-term relationship or a marriage using Internet dating services. Both men and women are also equally likely (54%) to complain about being misled by someone whose profile was deceptive.

And what the sexes really agree on is what they're actually using the Internet for: snooping. When Pew conducted its last major study on the role of the Internet in Americans' love lives, using search engines and social networking sites to keep tabs on exes and investigate future romantic prospects was not nearly the phenomenon it is now. That was back in 2005, before Facebook had officially become available to the general public and before smartphone usage had exploded.

Now, with those and many more technological innovations, it has become infinitely easier to get our snoop on. Just 11% of daters admitted to conducting online searches for information about dates in 2005. Now nearly a quarter of Internet users (24%) say they are guilty of researching dates and the number goes up (38%) if they're actively involved in the dating scene. 29% say they have searched online for information about someone they are currently dating or are considering dating, a number that was only 13% in 2005.

6 out of 10 Americans are now users of social networking services, which we have also turned into tools for stalking former flames. 1 in 3 say they've visited an ex-partner's profile to see what they've been up to. 30% of social network users who are active daters report using such services to collect intel on potential partners as well. For Internet users aged 18 to 29, that number jumps to 41%.

Like it or not, most of us have snooped at one point or another and it begs the question: which would we be more willing to give up, our ability to find new partners on the Internet, or our ability to find out about partners on the Internet?

This might be the craziest thing I've ever seen. And with the complete insanity that makes up most of my life, that's saying a lot.

Coming home for the holidays is a drag for plenty of single people. Some of us are lucky enough to have families who don't demand that we settle down, but for the rest of us, holiday singlehood comes along with a whole lot of disapproving looks from family members who can't believe we've chosen to focus on our careers instead of our hearts.

Enter Invisible Girlfriend, a site that does exactly what its name suggests: creates a virtual relationship with the (nonexistent) girl of your dreams. Subscribers to the nascent online service receive text messages, real voicemails, random gifts, a Facebook relationship status change, and even "emergency interactions" (whatever that means!) with their faux SOs.

In an interview, Invisible Girlfriend creator Matt Homann said "Our audience might come from a variety of situations: maybe they're in a same-sex relationship they're hiding from disapproving relatives, are trying to avoid the unwelcome advances from a coworker, or have chosen to focus on their work instead of romance."

Here's how it works:

• Step One: choose a plan that includes both virtual and real-world relationship "proof" to create a believable Invisible Girlfriend.
• Step Two: customize your new Invisible Girlfriend's personality and specify how the two of you will interact.
• Step Three: get back to living life on your own terms, and not on others'.

Right now, the company (which is still pre-launch) offers three monthly subscription packages to choose from: "Just Talking," "Getting Serious," and "Almost Engaged." For as low as $9.99 a month, you can create a significant other through texts, automated phone calls, and simple gifts. For $29.99 per month, you can receive premium gifts, real voicemails, and a Facebook relationship status. And for the highest price point, $49.99 per month, you can get custom girlfriend characterization, live phone calls, and the ability to personalize your own story.

"We're not trying to build a girlfriend they can believe in - that's a whole other level of technology," Homann told Riverfront Times. "We're giving them a better story to tell, even if the story isn't true."

The story of the company is itself a good story to tell. Invisible Girlfriend was pitched for the first time at Startup Weekend as a joke, but the idea quickly caught hold and a team created a rough product in just 54 hours. "It went from, 'Let's have some fun. Let's make everyone laugh,' to, 'We have the making and talent to build something that works,'" said Homann. They ended up walking away with first place in the competition, $3,000, and plans to launch an Invisible Boyfriend version.

Things we were into in 2013: Nelson Mandela, the iPhone 5s, bingewatching, twerking, Bitcoin, Bat-Kid, Breaking Bad, the royal baby, Grumpy Cat, and screaming goats.

Earlier this month Google released its annual Zeitgeist List, a collection of the top Google searches for the last 365 days that reveal what defined the year in pop culture, politics, technology, and more. "Every day, around the world, we search," Amit Singhal, senior vice president and Google Fellow, wrote in a Dec. 17 blog post. "We want to find out more about our heroes, explore far-away destinations or settle a dinner-table dispute between friends."

Because of that compulsive urge to search anything and everything online, Google is given unprecedented access to what captures the public imagination. The year-end Zeitgeist list uses Google Trends and other internal data tools to tap into the top trending searches of 2013 from 72 countries, and create a snapshot of the biggest people, places, moments, companies, and gadgets of the year.

Online dating plays an increasingly large role in the way we meet and choose our partners, so naturally Google included the year's most popular online dating services on the list. According to Google Zeitgeist, 2013's top ten dating services are:

1. Match.com
2. Chemistry.com
3. PlentyOfFish.com
4. Zoosk.com
5. eHarmony.com
6. FriendFinder.com
7. Tinder
8. Hinge
9. OurTime.com
10. OkCupid

Many of last year's entries are back again, though none retained the same positions. Match moved up a spot from #2 to #1, while PlentyOfFish dropped from the first place to third. OkCupid took a major hit in 2013, falling to #10 from #3 in 2012. Zoosk climbed a couple of spots to the forth position, and eHarmony fell slightly to fifth.

DateHookup, ChristianMingle, AdultFriendFinder, JDate, and SinglesNet all ranked last year but failed to make it on the 2013 Zeitgeist list. Instead, FriendFinder, OurTime, Chemistry, Tinder, and Hinge came from behind to take their place.

The most interesting additions to the list are, without a doubt, those last two. Tinder uses Facebook profiles to match members who respond with a simple left or right swipe to say "Yes" or "No." Hinge appears similar at first glance, but uses a "romance graph" to pair you with friends of friends that best suit your style - in other words, Tinder might get you a great hookup, but Hinge will find you a great relationship. Mobile dating took off in a big way this year, and shows no sign of stopping, so expect to see even more mobile services on the 2014 Zeitgeist report.