Advice

eHarmony did it, and now it's Match.com's turn to take on the Olympics. Inspired by the global games, Match conducted an international challenge of its own to see how singles from around the world stack up. Match surveyed over 3,000 singles from six countries - the US, the UK, France, Australia, Japan, and Canada - to learn more about each nation's unique take on the dating game.

Some countries, despite being separated by thousands of miles and massive bodies of water, proved to be remarkably similar in their dating habits. Other results revealed stark differences in cultural dating norms. Here's a look at the podium lineup:

• The gold medal for most dates was awarded to the United States. 77% of American singles reported going on two or more dates in the past year, followed by Canada (71%) and the UK (67%). Australia came in last place, with 46%. Better luck at the next games, Australia!
• The US also scored highly in the "Boldest Women" category, but Canadian ladies ultimately took the gold. 63% of Canadian women and 62% of American women reported taking the lead and asking men out on dates.
• The gold for "Independent Thinking" went to France, where 74% of French singles said that their friends' opinions don't factor into their dating choices. In second place, after a wide gap, was Japan at 47%. North America came in at the opposite end of the spectrum, with 70% of Americans and 68% of Canadians reporting that friends' opinions are very important when it comes to choosing a mate.
• The award for most egalitarian went to the UK, at least when it comes to finances. The majority of women in the UK (52%) said they offer to split the check 50/50 on alternating dates, far more than women in any other country. The ladies most averse to picking up the tab reside in France, where 27% of respondents said they would never pick up the check while on a date (they were followed by Australians at 20% and Americans at 17%).
• Australia took home the gold for most PDA-friendly nation, where 22% of survey participants said the more PDA, the better. Other nations may be more reticent, but all expressed approval of low-key PDA, like hand-holding.
• The French continued their winning privacy streak by earning the gold for "Least Likely To Kiss And Tell." 35% of French singles said they prefer not to share the details of their dates with friends, while a whopping 92% of US singles said they'd be happy to spill the beans to their friends.
• Japan brought home the top awards for love and commitment. 82% said they believe in love at first sight, compared to more skeptical nations like the UK, where 58% reported believing in the phenomenon. Japanese singles are also the most likely to shack up after less than a year of dating (59%), with the US (34%) and Canada (31%) picking up the rear.

And who was victorious in the most competitive event of all? The gold for "Hottest Singles In The World" went to...everyone. Participants from every country surveyed overwhelmingly voted their own singles into the top spot.

To find out more about the service which brought you this survey you can check out our review of Match.com

It sounds cliché, but sometimes as we struggle and strive for something that seems important to us - when we achieve it, it's not exactly what we thought.

The same goes for relationships. Picture this: you've been dating a really hot, sexy guy for the last two months. When you're with him, things are great, but sometimes he gets flaky and cancels on you at the last minute, or doesn't return your texts. But you forgive him the next time you see him because he makes you swoon. You would give anything to be his girlfriend - to have an official relationship. You think you would be good together.

And then he does exactly what you want - he asks you to be his girlfriend, or to move in together, or take another step towards full-fledged commitment. You're ecstatic, right? Now things will be great between you because he's committed. But then he continues with his same behavior patterns - whether he forgets to call, or he cancels on you at the last minute, or he gets angry and blames you for problems in his life, or he hangs out more with his friends than he does with you.

It's not exactly what you pictured, right?

While I'm not trying to be a downer, I think it's best to go into a relationship with open eyes. Notice the red flags first, especially how he treats you. Is he selfish, or stand-offish, or impulsive? These things can contribute to problems in your relationship, even after it's official.

It's easy to make excuses for your significant other when you want things to work out, like: "He's just busy at work," instead of admitting that he isn't really ready to commit to being in a relationship with someone and all it entails - including being upfront about one another's schedules and making time for each other. Or maybe you find yourself saying: "she needs a lot of down time to herself to recharge," instead of admitting that she's not putting the relationship first and prefers to keep things more casual and distant.

You want your SO to behave differently once you're in a relationship, but that's not realistic. People don't change their behavior without conscious effort on their part - not by you asking them to do something different. And, you have to really want to be in a relationship and understand the implications - that you make time and effort for another person. That it's no longer all about you.

Bottom line: Look for red flags and behavior patterns before jumping into a relationship, and recognize that it's about compromise and communication.

So, you’re an adult now. Maybe you’re happy with your job, or you’ve got more than your share of friends. Maybe the very act of joining an online dating site was a declaration, that you would take charge of your own destiny and not wait for love to come calling. You’re more mature, more confident, more secure than you were back in junior high.

Why, then, do you find old demons rising when you meet someone new or go on dates? Anxiety is rearing its head. Your confidence is faltering. You’re finding yourself asking what the other person thinks before giving your own opinion. You conquered these issues years ago! What is happening?

As adults, we naturally have more control over our day-to-day lives. Maybe it’s that we’ve had the same job for years, or maybe it’s that we’ve lived in the same town, with the same social circle, for decades. Compare that to the life of a teen, where you’re old enough to know you want independence but have virtually no power over your routines, life-altering decisions - practically your life. You’re forced to be in new and different classes every year, and change schools every few years. With the sands constantly shifting beneath them, it’s no wonder teens can be surly and full of angst.

Entering the dating world after a long absence can be stressful, whether it’s the good or bad kind. It’s a change in your routine. You’re meeting new people, having new experiences. If you’re entering into a relationship, you’re having to think of the needs of a new person, while balancing your own independent identity. Yes, it can be thrilling and fun, but with your comfort level challenged, it’s also normal for you to momentarily lose your footing, let insecurity overtake you, and be forced to re-learn a few lessons about yourself.

There’s good news, though: the effect is only temporary. Once you allow yourself to acclimate to the dating pool, as it were, you’ll get used to the new level of challenges and rise to meet it. It might happen so subtly you don’t even notice it. The things about dating that once seemed so daunting will now be the new normal, and not difficult at all.

So as you step foot into the world of dating, don’t panic if you find yourself, well, panicking. Yes, it’s something new. Yes, it can stir up old insecurities. But at the same time, you could meet new friends, new loves. It’s a tradeoff worth making - especially since the negative effects will fade away.

The summer Olympics are finally here and in honor of the worldwide event, eHarmony has put together a few games of its own. To capture the spirit of the 2012 London games, eHarmony surveyed 2,012 men and women to find out exactly what games are being played in American love lives. The results of the Dating Games 2012 can be found in infographic form here, and here's the condensed version:

• Rules are made to be broken, and the 3-Day Rule is now a thing of the past. 71% of men and 73% of women say that waiting three days before returning a phone call or following up after a date is "ridiculous."
• That being said, playing hard to get is still in style, and women aren't the only ones who do it. 41% admit to intentionally being coy to maintain the mystery and up the attraction ante.
• Pickup lines get a bad rap (and yeah...a lot of them are terrible), but 44% of women say they actually like pickup lines. As long as you stay away from the especially bad ones, they might give your love life a surprising boost.
• Remember when looking up your date online was considered taboo? It's now becoming the norm. Nearly half of men and women admit to Googling dates before meeting up for the first time. Performing an amateur background check when meeting someone online isn't a bad idea, but be careful not to go overboard. If you don't save some of the getting-to-know-you process for the actual dates, you won't have anything to talk about!
• These days people text so much that I've started to wonder why mobile phones still make phone calls at all, but apparently I've underestimated daters' love of the phone chat. Over 75% of men and women say they prefer a phone conversation to a text message.
• Speaking of rules that are meant to be broken, The Rules are also meant to be broken. Faking popularity by appearing to be busy when you really aren't is no longer the popular thing to do. 89% of men and 77% of women say they would be happy to go on a same-day, last-minute date if they were available. In other words: no more pretending to have a date when they only date you actually have is with a pint of Ben & Jerry's, your sofa, and the latest episode of The Bachelorette.

Let the (dating) games commence!

To find out more about this popular dating site you can read our eHarmony review.

Rebound love happens all the time, especially if you pay attention to the lives of celebrities. Recently, Johnny Depp broke up with his longtime girlfriend and started dating actress Amber Heard a few weeks later. But he's not the only one.

Break-ups are emotional, and often leave you feeling devastated and lonely. In tough times, it can be easy to reach out to someone new - for sex, companionship, or a number of other reasons. But is this a healthy response?

Rebound relationships are often temporary, and can leave you feeling even worse after they fall apart. Some people then go on to repeat the cycle, avoiding dealing with their own pain in favor of the distraction of a new relationship. The most important question to ask yourself before you enter into a rebound relationship is: what do I really want?

If your answer is that you don't want to be alone or feel lonely, then jumping into a relationship with someone new isn't going to make those feelings go away. If you haven't dealt with your pain, and aren't able to emotionally function on your own without a relationship, then it's not a good idea to mask your pain with a rebound. It's good to know who you are both within and outside a relationship - and after a breakup is usually the best time to discover yourself again. What your interests, feelings, and opinions are now - outside of any relationship.

Some people feel that they want a casual relationship with no strings attached - that they aren't looking for anything serious, so a rebound works well. While this is fine as long as both parties agree, often this is another delaying tactic, and eventually you will have to face your pain and work through what went wrong in your last relationship.

The most important thing to keep in mind after a break-up is: if you spend some time alone to figure out what you really want and what you could do differently, your next relationship will be better. We all need to understand ourselves and our motivations, and sometimes the best way to do this is on our own, apart from a partner, girlfriend, spouse, etc. By asking yourself the tough questions, and figuring out what you could change - whether it's better communication, controlling your anger, or a number of other challenges - you will be on firmer ground with the next person, and you won't repeat the same mistakes with someone else.

While there are a myriad of reasons why someone might decide to try online dating, one reason does tend to pop up frequently: for some, online dating is less intimidating, less anxiety-ridden. For those that find themselves so very shy that they don’t like to approach anyone in person, online dating can make the difference between reaching out and not. But many people, even those who aren’t painfully shy, notice a difference when talking to someone online. In fact, sometimes it can be a little too easy.

The problem can be summed up in one acronym: TMI. Too much information. When we chance to meet someone in person for the first time, we’re naturally a little guarded. We’ll say hello, crack a few jokes, and maybe share a bit about ourselves, but we probably won’t delve into our problems with our exes, our sexual prowess or the minutiae of what we had for breakfast that morning. However, it’s not uncommon to see any or all of this in online profiles or social media messages.

Too much information, too soon can turn someone off altogether before they’ve had a chance to actually get to know you. Or, worse: it can cause feelings and connections that are too intense before they’ve had a chance to get to know you.

“Wait a minute,” you might be thinking. “Isn’t the point to forge an intense connection?” Well, yes, if you’re sure there’s actual chemistry between you. But I’ve known people who have had quite intense email exchanges before they’ve ever even met in person, only to discover when they finally did that there was no spark. One or both walks away, deflated, dejected and wondering why they wasted their time and energy on a relationship that was doomed to never begin.

So as you construct your online profile and write your emails, remember a few points. First, your profile is your first impression, so while you want to be memorable, open and fun, you don’t need to share every explicit detail of your life. Even your first few emails are the equivalent of small talk, general get-to-know-you feeling out and ensuring that no red flags pop up.

And after that... get to a meeting in person! There’s no point investing your heart when you don’t even know if there’s a more basic attraction between the two of you. If you start a relationship without meeting, you’re doing your potential match, as well as yourself, a disservice. So just remember: while it’s good to be open and honest, when it comes to meeting someone new there is such a thing as too much information, too quickly!