Statistics

"For as long as romantic relationships have existed," says the new survey from the Pew Internet & American Life Project, "people have sought assistance in meeting potential partners using whatever options were at their disposal."

And for as long as scientific studies have existed, say I, researchers have been trying to explain love via facts, figures, and other data.

The latest in that long line of relationship research is the 2013 Online Dating & Relationships study conducted by Pew. "The rise of tech-enabled dating help has been one of the most striking developments of the digital era," continues the study, "and these alternative ways of meeting and mating have arisen at a time of fundamental change in the structure of marriage and divorce in America."

The number of Americans getting married is steadily declining and today it is at a record low of 51%, down from the 72% of adults who were married in 1960. Americans are also postponing marriage until later in life, and are often choosing other options - including cohabitation and single person households - instead. But fear not - the institution is not yet dead. Around 61% of men and women who have never married say that tying the knot is in their plans someday.

While there are few left who disagree that online dating is a good way to meet potential partners, some have claimed it actually produces more successful relationships than traditional offline dating. Research is so far inconclusive on that matter, but what it has proven is that online dating and offline dating offer noticeably different experiences.

The perks of online dating include:

• The ability to draw from a deep pool of potential partners that goes well outside of one's existing social networks
• The ability to communicate online or via email prior to arranging a face-to-face meeting
• Matching algorithms that help users to filter potential partners based on pre-existing criteria
• More opportunities for members of niche communities who have limited options for meeting people in real life

On the other hand, online dating nay-sayers believe that the rise of online dating is contributing to the downfall of committed relationships. Young adults are not motivated to choose marriage, they argue, because online dating provides an endless stream of romantic and sexual options that lowers their interest in long-term relationships.

Much has changed, not just our approaches to marriage and commitment, since Pew last conducted a survey like this. 2005 saw the Pew Research Center's last foray into the Internet's impact on dating and relationships. In the intervening years, mobile phone usage has exploded (the iPhone hadn't even been born yet!) and social networking sites have taken over the Web. The ways in which people seek out, research, meet, and interact with potential partners will never be the same.

Is online dating still a last resort for singles? Not according to the latest Pew Internet and American Life study released in late October.

Research revealed that one in ten American adults have used online dating sites such as Match.com, eHarmony or OkCupid. Even more interesting was that 7% of mobile users said they've used a mobile dating app, showing that mobile dating has grown rapidly since the apps first appeared a few years ago.

The study showed that attitudes about online dating have changed since 2005 when the last survey was conducted. A majority of Americans are generally positive about online dating. Among those polled, 59 percent agreed with the statement that "online dating is a good way to meet people," compared with just 44 percent in 2005. And 52 percent agreed with the sentiment that "online dating allows people to find a better match for themselves because they can get to know a lot more people," up from 29 percent in 2005.

Even more impressive was that 42% of Internet users say they know someone who is using a dating website, even if they aren't themselves, up from 31% in 2005. Also, 29% know someone who married or had a long-term relationship with a person they met through online dating, compared with 15% in the last survey.

Not everyone is so smitten with online dating, however. Twenty-one percent agreed with the comment that "people who use online dating sites are desperate," though that was down from 29 percent in 2005. Also, Pew posed a first-time question in the study, asking "does online dating keep people from settling down because they always have options for people to date?" Thirty-two percent answered in the affirmative.

The more interesting findings were in some of the experiences people had on online dating sites. Fifty-four percent "felt someone else seriously misrepresented themselves in their profile," and 28% "have been contacted by someone through an online dating site or app in a way that made them feel harassed or uncomfortable." Forty-two percent of women felt this way, compared to only 17% of men.

The report is based on a survey of 2,252 adults aged 18 and older. According to the report's lead author Aaron Smith, "we're not just looking at users of a particular site or a convenience sample. We have the ability to look at a nationally representative portion of the population to show not only what's happening now but how those behaviors have changed over a period of time."

A few years ago, Match.com became a household name when it comes to online dating. Now that mobile apps like Tinder have gained popularity and people are looking to newer and niche online dating sites like JDate or How About We, people are starting to see what else is out there.

In fact, social media, and Facebook in particular, are becoming players in the game. While traditional sites rely on new sign-ups and static searches, social media-friendly dating sites and apps pull information from a vast pool of active Facebook profiles and introduce you to friends of friends in your network. This has become a big draw for people, because most singles feel more comfortable meeting someone new if they have a friend in common. This is especially true for women, who are sometimes skeptical of the safety of online dating.

According to an article in Wall Street Cheat Sheet, entrepreneurs are just beginning to understand the importance of utilizing social media in industries like online dating, which could mean big revenues in the future. LinkedIn has gained traction in the social media space because the platform focuses solely on job seekers and networkers looking for career opportunities. There is a sense of trust when someone comes recommended for a job by a mutual friend or co-worker, so companies are looking to the service to attract new employees. So why not apply the same principal to those looking for a date?

Women can be picky daters. At least, that's the stereotype. We like our men to be incredibly hot, smart, successful, and charming, and we aren't willing to settle for anything less, right ladies?

Well, maybe that holds true for women in some cities, but not others.

According to data released from dating website AreYouInterested.com, women in Brooklyn are the pickiest daters in America (coming in ahead of Los Angeles and Manhattan). The website compiled this information based on 453,000 interactions of women ages 18 and up, noting that Brooklyn residents are the least likely to reply to messages from potential dates. Men would have more luck in Jersey City, New Jersey.

Behind Brooklyn, Detroit, Minneapolis, Cincinnati and Los Angeles also ranked highest for the pickiest daters.

But perhaps creativity has something to do with response rates. AYI.com also found that emails engaging the respondent ("where are you from?") worked much better than emails just saying "hi," or "what's up?" which fell flat.

Other interesting findings:

• Women are 71% more likely to respond to someone if they have a mutual friend on Facebook.
• Women are three times more likely to respond to a younger man than men are to respond to a younger woman. It seems cougars are in among AYI.com members!

The cities where women are most likely to get in touch after a potential date has reached out include Miami, St Louis, Las Vegas and Portland, Oregon. So guys, on your next Vegas trip you might want to consider moving permanently.

AYI.com has an interesting base of users though - it's not strictly an online dating site, but identifies itself as more of a social discovery site. Members don't only join for dating purposes, but also to form friendships. Social discovery sites provide a place where people can meet and socialize online - to make friends, play video games, exchange music, or a number of different things - not just to date. Which means users who join stay around longer, even after they meet a significant other.

So are women picky about their friendships, too?

According to its website, AYI.com has more than 70 million installed users and over 3 million Facebook fans. It offers an integrated Facebook app, iPhone app, Android app and website, and works by connecting members to each other based on mutual Facebook friends and interests.

The company is owned by SNAP Interactive and you can find more details on them by reading our review of Are You Interested.

It seems Australians have gotten over the stigma that used to come with online dating. The majority of singles (51%) said they have either tried online dating or are willing to give it a shot. It seems more and more are looking outside their own networks of friends, colleagues and family to pursue a romantic relationship.

So if you're a resident, you might be wondering: who would I be meeting through an online dating site?

Two of the country's most popular online dating sites, eHarmony and RSVP, have pulled research from their membership to reveal the typical Australian online dater. So in case you were wondering, now's your chance to find out before you sign up.

According to eHarmony, which has a user base of about two million in the country, the average Australian online dater has never been married, is in her (or his) early to mid-thirties and works as a teacher. The next most popular professions for females are nursing and retail, and for men - truck driving. It makes sense that singles in such isolated professions, some with shifting schedules, would look for love online.

"Plenty of research exists showing that many people meet their partner at work," eHarmony spokeswoman Sarah Mason told the Sydney Morning Herald. "However, a large number work in an environment which is not conducive to developing meaningful romantic relationships. Others may be too time-poor, or just shirk at the thought of making small talk in a noisy bar after a long day at work."

The research from dating site RSVP differed a bit from eHarmony, however. According to them, the most popular age group is between 25-34, followed by 35-44 year-olds. For these members, the most popular occupation is in healthcare, followed by education and science.

Not surprisingly, most of the women on RSVP want men who are a few inches taller. Both sexes prefer people with green eyes. Also, vegetarians have a 37% higher success rate with other vegetarians on the site.

RSVP has about two million members as well.

While this research paints a picture of the typical online dater in Australia, especially in terms of professions they hold, it doesn't reference all of the diversity found online. Let's face it: people have all different backgrounds, preferences, and reasons for joining a dating site. Variety of choice is more important to online dating than knowing the "types" of people you might see online when you join. People connect based on chemistry, not on profession, height preference, or even the type of food you enjoy. So date with an open mind.

How About We may be the first online dating site that offers a service especially for couples. Their latest venture, How About We For Couples, aims to plan, book, and arrange dates for people who are looking to spice up their relationships. They launched in New York and San Francisco and are planning other cities in the near future. So far, they have 130,000 couples signed up.

The founders noticed a trend among couples of relying on Netflix and take-out meals for entertainment, losing the magic that comes with the headiness and excitement of a new relationship. So instead of sitting on the couch, How About We for Couples provides ideas to get you both inspired and to cultivate relationships instead of letting them go stale.

How About We have been innovators from the beginning. When its founders Brian Schechter and Aaron Schildkrout first started researching the online dating industry, they noticed a fundamental problem: online dating sites don't push people to meet offline and build relationships from there. In fact, the industry's success depends on members sitting in front of their laptops scrolling through endless profiles rather than forming real life relationships.

With this in mind, the founders created an innovative new way to date online - by taking it offline quickly. Members post and view first date ideas, rather than scrolling through dating profiles. An example might be, "How about we...go for a picnic in the park, followed by live music at North Bar?" If someone found that idea enticing, they'd connect with each other and set something up. The focus is not on the dating profiles, but on the real-life meeting.

The problem? It became too successful. Many users of How About We started to couple up, and the company started to lose members. But instead of messing with its success, the founders extended the basic premise of great date ideas to those who are already in relationships.

The How About We editorial team comes up with the date plan, which centers on fun new places to go and creating opportunities for the couples to really connect. If you want to upgrade, you can purchase their concierge service to have How About We plan your date down to the smallest detail, like delivering flowers or hiring car service for the night.

"We're curating the dates for our couple members. The concept is still the same, but we've become the experts," Schildkrout told news magazine Business Insider. "This really filled out the whole vision of the company, which isn't only about helping people fall in love, but also about helping people stay in love."