Advice

Dancing, music, humor, and organized fighting.

These 5 things are the interests that appear most frequently on OkCupid's list of the stuff Latino men like, a part of their newest study of online dating trends. The importance of music and dancing to the culture is clearly exhibited by both the men's list and the women's list: the terms "merengue," "bachata," "reggaeton," "musica," and "salsa" appear in both lists, always in the first half. Latino men also appear to have, in Christian Rudder's words, "an interest in telling you about their sense of humor" and "an interest in industrial strength ass-kicking." "I'm a funny guy," "comedy," "very funny," and "outgoing and funny," make the men's list of most-used words and phrases, as do "boxing," "Marines," "MMA," "UFC," and "law enforcement."

The interests of Latina women are, for the most part, exactly what you would expect from an online dating profile. Family is mentioned ("familia," "family-oriented," "mom's"), as are friends ("amigos," "my girlfriends"). Career and schooling make appearances as "education," "medical field," "my B.A." and "social worker." Movies, music, and physical appearance are also important ("Sixteen Candles," "Juanes," and "mascara"). Latina women break the mold, however, with "I'm terrified of," a phrase which appears at #42 on their list. OkCupid's team delved further into that unusual phrase, and discovered that the words that typically come next are "insects" and "the dark," "though one expert tautologist is 'terrified of being scared' and another woman is 'terrified of Martians.'"

Simplicity dominates the lists for Asian men and women. "I'm a simple guy" occupies the second spot on the men's list, while "I'm a simple girl" takes the third spot on the women's list. Asian men are also careful to mention their specific heritage in their profiles. "Taiwan" is the #1 term on the men's list, with "Korea," "Singapore," and "Korean" following in the 3rd, 5th, and 7th positions. Food ("pho," "a foodie," "sashimi") and sports ("cricket," "tennis," "badminton") are important to Asian men, but not as important as education and occupation. "Freakonomics," "mechanical engineer," "an engineer," "entrepreneur," "analyst," "Malcolm Gladwell," "finance," "accountant," "pursuing my," "investing," "electrical engineering," "investment," and "currently studying" all make the list.

Asian women also describe themselves as foodies (with a particular interest in "chocolates," which is #2 on their list), but show an interest in cooking the food as well as consuming it ("Food Network," "Anthony Bourdain," "new recipes," "cooking and baking," "cookbooks"). Like the women of every other culture, Asian women enjoy music ("Jason Mraz," "Michael Buble," "Norah Jones") and movies ("Slumdog Millionaire," "Sleepless in Seattle," "A Walk To Remember"), but what really makes Asian women stand out is their worldliness and urge to explore. "Different places," "different cultures," "trying out new things," and "my passport" appear on their list but, with the exception of a couple of overlaps with Asian men, not on any other lists.

Rudder does not provide commentary on the lists for Indians, Middle Easterners, and Pacific Islanders, so join us next time for a breakdown of the final 3 cultures and a look at effectiveness of the study.

The innovative terms Jessica Massa uses may be confusing and unfamiliar, but her view of love in the 21st century is simple: traditional dating is over and, while many of us are not yet ready to embrace formalized online dating, "almost all of us are romantically engaging with potential paramours online via the least stigmatized social media outlet out there - Facebook."

Facebook, Massa writes in "You're Online Dating and You Don't Even Know It!," is based on the idea of platonic friendship, but the social networking site is really "one big online party, rife with flirtations, mixed signals, behavioral assumptions and outright Jersey Shore-style creeping." In fact, Facebook has become such an integral part of everyday modern life that most of us can't help treating it like the world's largest free online dating site.

And why shouldn't we embrace it? Massa compares Facebook's functionality to the functionality typical of popular online dating sites, and concludes that many of Facebook's most recognizable and utilized features are actually dating site features in disguise.

The most obvious comparison is the message. Sending personalized messages that are witty, intelligent, and intriguing is the first step towards success on online dating sites, and it's no different on Facebook. If you're interested in initiating communication with someone, review their profile and create a unique message that telegraphs your interest by referencing specific details from their profile and asking questions about things that genuinely pique your curiosity.

You're probably also familiar with the idea of "the poke," though you're more likely to have seen other versions of it, such as the ubiquitous "Flirt," "Wink," or "Smile" features that appear on countless online dating sites. A poke is a low-key, low-risk way to bring yourself to someone's attention, but in the long run it achieves very little. Sending instant communication to someone by pressing a button says "I don't really have anything interesting to say to you" or "I don't actually care enough about you to take the time to write an individualized message." And if you're really unlucky, Massa writes, a poke says "'Let's face it, I'm a little creepy and I want to holler at you and am one of the last people to use the poke feature as a meaningful tool.'" Fight the temptation to poke if you're sincerely interested in taking the relationship to the next level.

How else does Facebook mimic the practices of online and traditional dating? Stick around for Part II of this series, where we'll continue our chat about Massa's post-dating world with a discussion of some of Facebook's other functionality, like the friend request, the wall post, and the new Facebook Place feature.

Read the original article here.

Among the multitude of online dating sites, there remains a slim margin of those catering to specific and perhaps unusual interests. Although they may sound a little strange, they’re a great place to find people with similar interests in a place free of judgment. Here are a few examples:

ScientificMatch.com: this online dating website requires a bit of DNA instead of a multiple choice compatibility test to find your matches. By analyzing your DNA and comparing it to other users, they determine your matches based on your genetic material. Among the benefits proposed by its creators, Scientific Match guarantees that you'll love the way your match smells, you will be sexually compatible, less likely to cheat, have better odds at conception, and that any potential offspring will have better immune systems due to the site's algorithmic dedication to genetic diversity. Sound interesting? It will only set you back about $2,000. Looking for something a little more affordable? Try GenePartner.com. They offer similar services for only $100.

DarwinDating.com: their tagline? "Online dating for beautiful people only!" They even have a list of dating rules excluding any type of non-beautiful traits or behaviors. Among them: no nerdy glasses, no mullets, no red hair and too many freckles, no out of date fashions, and no overuse of bright blue eye shadow. Sound shallow and limited? Perhaps, but it obviously has an audience. If you demand physical beauty from your date, this may be the place to go!

Gk2gk.com: Need a little intellectual stimulation in your date? Try Geek 2 Geek. Providing a refreshing contrast to the beautiful people dating site, Geek 2 Geek is a place for geeks and lovers of geeks to meet and date. Among the proposed reasons why one might want to date a geek, they write that geeks don't cheat, appreciate their mates, haven't formed bad relationship habits, have an imagination, and tend to be happy and successful in their chosen field.

PositiveSingles.com: this online date is specifically catered to people with STDs. I found this site particularly interesting because it allows people with STDs to be upfront and straight forward with each other without the fear of judgment.

Agematch.com: Looking for someone within a specific age group? This online dating site allows you to search by age. It is the self-proclaimed site for pairing older women with younger men or older men with younger women, excelling in age-gap dating.

OKCupid’s official blog, OKTrends, recently sent a powerful warning to its readers:

Don’t Be Ugly By Accident!

The eye-catching admonishment is the title of a post about the site’s latest study, an in-depth technical look at profile photos that forms the perfect follow-up to their previous report on the subject, “The 4 Big Myths of Profile Pictures” (check out our review of the article here). Instead of merely considering the content of the photos we post, writer Christian Rudder advises, we should also take practical matters like aperture, flash, and focus into account.

The article chronicles the results of a study that aggregated 11.4 million opinions on what makes a successful photo. The experiment was simple: subjects were shown two photographs of different people, chosen randomly from the 552,000 sample user pictures that were collected, and asked which person they would prefer to go on a date with. The information gathered was then compared with data about the photography itself, like the time of day and shutter speed at which the pictures were taken.

The most amusing claim, by far, is that iPhone users have more sex than users of other mobile devices. BlackBerry users came in second place, with Android aficionados bringing up the rear. No word on how much sex Windows Mobile users can expect during their lifetimes (or at least the lifetimes of their cell phones).

In less humorous news, OKCupid’s findings show that the best photos come from Panasonic Micro 4/3s cameras, while the worst come from the cameras on Motorola phones. The next best camera brands were Leica, Canon, Pentax, Nikon, Sony, and Olympus (in that order), while Kodak was judged to be almost as bad as the Motorola phone. Of the camera phones, Sidekick was considered the best, with Apple’s iPhone close behind. Somewhat surprisingly, Android, Nokia, BlackBerry, and Windows phones were all rated lower than phones of less popular brands.

The flash, according to the study, should always be avoided. Subjects consistently assigned a higher attractiveness rating to photos that did not use the flash. Based on their data, the experimenters determined that the flash adds about 7 years of age to the person in the photo (and, consequently, not using a flash can remove 7 years of age from a person’s appearance).

Other findings suggest that the best pictures have “a very shallow depth of field,” which means that the photo’s subject is sharply in focus while the background of the picture is blurry. The article goes on to give a very technical explanation for this effect, and some examples of it, so be sure to visit the source at the link provided below if you’re interested in photography.

The study’s final conclusion is that late night and late afternoon are the ideal times at which to take your profile photo. Rudder “irresponsibly theorize[s]” that this is because “photos taken in the former bracket tend to be more provocative,” while “those taken in the latter tend to be pleasantly lit.”

OKCupid’s findings are certainly attention-grabbing, but do they actually have any value? Tune in next time when we’ll take a look at what the data actually means, and where it might be leading you astray.

Read more about the study here.

More people are online dating than ever before, and new dating websites are on the rise along with them. With all the choice out there, how do you know which site is right for you?

There are basic categories of sites, so depending on what type of relationship you're looking for, here are some suggestions:

If you are just getting started, you might want to try a site that gives you the flexibility to search as well as find matches for you, preferably a reputable site with a lot of members. These sites include Match.com (read review), LavaLife (read review), and Nerve.com. If you prefer to try online dating without the financial investment, sites like OkCupid and PlentyofFish offer free memberships, but these sites can also attract less serious daters.

If you are looking for a long-term or serious relationship, sites like eHarmony (read review) and Chemistry.com (read review) promise better matches with more serious daters. These sites do the matching for you based on extensive questionnaires and personality profiling.

Sites like Thread.com (which connects members through Facebook networks) and Friendster offer dating through social networking. If you prefer to meet potential dates by building virtual friendships first, these sites might work well for you.

If you prefer to date people who have the same passions or interests as you, there are a variety of niche dating sites. VeggieDate.org connects vegetarians, Democratic Singles connects those of the same political persuasion, and there are countless religious-based dating sites, such as JDate.com (read review) for Jewish singles. There are even sites for the technology-driven dater, like Cupidtino.com which bring together lovers of Apple products.

There are also sites that involve more real-time interaction online, such as virtual dating sites and online speed dating. Smingle.com allows members to create avatars and go on "virtual dates" with each other. WinkVid.com and SpeedDate.com are sites that offer online speed dating via webcam chats with several people over the course of an hour.

No matter what your dating preferences are, chances are there's a site out there for you.

Online dating has become one of the most popular ways for singles to meet in recent years. We no longer have to rely on networks of friends and family to find love. In fact, we can browse through potential suitors in the privacy of our own homes, and reach out to the ones who pique our interest.

Some companies have taken the convenience of online dating a step further, offering virtual dating services.

Many online dating sites provide instant messaging services for members to communicate when they are logged in, so you can bypass the email exchange. In addition, some such as SpeedDate.com offer video chats via webcam, so members can "meet" online without having to do so in person. WinkVid.com offers a virtual speed dating service, where members can sign up for a live video chat (Chatroulette-style), and meet 10 other singles in an hour, all over a laptop.

If you are into a true virtual experience (which may appeal to the gamers out there), you might also like sites like Smingle.com which let you create an avatar to go on virtual dates for you. You can pick the background setting for the date as well, from a sidewalk café to a trendy bar.

All of these developments lead me to ask, is it better to meet virtually than in person?

Some people prefer the convenience virtual dating provides. It doesn't take a lot of time or commitment (no driving, parking, money spent on drinks or dinner, or effort spent getting dressed up). This does make virtual dating an enticing way to meet singles, especially for those with busy schedules. Virtual dates take mere minutes, whereas more time is involved to meet someone in person.

But isn't there something to be said for a real date? Meeting face-to-face is still the best way to see if there is any real chemistry. This way, the online prospects that interest you can get a fair shot at seeing if there's a match.

So even if you enjoy the convenience of virtual dating, nothing gives better perspective than meeting someone IRL. The chance of a new relationship is worth the time and effort.