Single

I've seen a lot of unusual things in my years spent exploring the on- and offline dating industries, but this strikes me as one of the odder ones.

It's called the MY Single Band, and it's a bracelet that advertises your singlehood. Essentially, it's the single person's equivalent of a wedding ring - a piece of jewelry that identifies your relationship status and encourages or discourages approaches from others. Except the brightly colored MY Single Bands won't set you back nearly as much as a diamond.

"What if you could identify everyone who is single?" asks MY Single World. "The more we thought about the idea of identifying single people, the more we realized the extent to which we take a passive approach to meeting others." Online dating is helping singles take a more proactive approach to their love lives, but offline dating lacks tools that facilitate connection and discourage passivity. "Through increased connectivity, MY Single Band gives fate, future and destiny a helping hand," the site continues.

If that doesn't already sound like an over-the-top mission, just listen to what the site's creators, Rob Young and Rina Mardahl, have to say. The pair claim that the silicone wristbands are the "future of dating" and that, if they catch on, MY Single Bands are poised to put online dating out of business. Sounds like a tall order, if you ask me. One that isn't likely to come through any time soon.

In theory, by wearing the Livestrong-esque MY Single Band, you announce your status to the world in hopes that someone will spot the bracelet and start a conversation. It's a nice thought, but does it stand any chance of working in reality?

Plenty of engaged (or married, for that matter) women can attest that sporting a ring on their fingers doesn't do much to deter men from approaching them. What are the odds that a brightly colored bracelet will do the opposite?

Then there's the simple problem of recognition. Unless a whole bunch of singles suddenly become aware of MY Single Bands and their significance, they won't be useful for anything more than accessorizing. And with so many similar rubber wristbands on the market, MY Single Bands could easily be mistaken for a bucketload of other things.

There's also the stigma situation. Online dating lugged around a sense of shame for years, one that announcing your availability via a bracelet could easily adopt. The site's owners are convinced their bracelets would shed those concerns quickly, but I have my doubts. I'm all for adding a little color to my wardrobe, but I don't think I'll be using it to find dates any time soon.

The new year is around the corner, and you know what that means - more resolutions! Are you wanting to change things in your life, to have more fun on dates, to meet someone special? This is the time of year to reflect on what's most important to you and what you'd like to improve.

We make resolutions every year to do things differently, but then once we start the task seems overwhelming and difficult. But it doesn't have to be if you take small steps. Changing your dating life doesn't mean denying yourself fun - it means injecting a little more fun into it. Taking yourself out of the normal routine, meeting new people. There's nothing too hard about that!

Following are some resolutions you can make that will make a huge difference in your dating experience:

Engage in conversation. Instead of sizing your date up over a twenty-minute coffee meeting, try approaching the next date with an open mind. Ask questions, get to know the person sitting across from you. Even if he's not right for you, he likely has something interesting to share. We all have different experiences, and it connects us to be able to share them. Engage in more conversations, instead of quickly writing your dates off.

Mix up your routine. There's nothing that says "boring date" like the twentieth time you're meeting someone for coffee at the shop around the corner. So, pick a new place! Instead of traditional dates like drinks or dinner, try doing something active instead. Take your dogs for a walk in the park. Go on a bike ride. Or since it's winter, try ice skating or indoor rock climbing. You'll find it's easier to connect and converse with someone when you are active. It also makes your time together more fun.

Give every date a second chance. Don't just go on a series of first dates. If you aren't sure about someone, or there wasn't the great chemistry but you had a nice time, go on at least one more date. Most people are nervous for first meetings and you don't really get a sense of who they are. Instead of being quick to judge, try taking a step back and moving more slowly. It pays off.

Project what you want to attract. If you are looking for love, you won't get it by having a negative attitude about dating or blaming others for not being what you want. Try taking a more positive approach. Most people are looking for love just like you. If you allow yourself to enter a date with a fresh perspective, to be willing to give love, then you'll find a whole different dating experience.

Dump those lists. I know we all have standards, but sometimes they just don't serve us. Instead of getting hung up on someone meeting all of those qualifications you require (lots of hair, nice smile, taller than me), try thinking about how you want to feel in a relationship (listened to, supported, encouraged). It makes a big difference.

It's that time of year! Houses are strung with lights, carolers are singing, and mistletoe seems to be hanging everywhere. While there's a lot of celebrating and gift-giving all around, the holidays can make some people feel more lonely and excluded. Ever been to a family dinner or office party where everyone was coupled up?

This year, it's time to make a few promises to yourself. If you want to meet someone, it's important to be social and put yourself out there rather than letting the season go by and holing up in your house until January. And if you're coming off a break-up, then it's important to set some boundaries with friends and family (who might want to introduce you to cousin Phil's co-worker) and instead do what feels right for you (thanks but no thanks!).

Following are some tips for the holiday season:

Keep office parties professional. Maybe you love your co-workers and have gone to happy hours with them on several occasions, but an office party is different. Consider it an extension of your workday. You don't want to drink too much and subsequently flirt with your boss's husband. Keep your personal life out of office politics - even during the holidays. There are plenty of other places to meet people.

Reign in family gatherings. Do you feel like you get cornered by Aunt Sally at every holiday meal because she wants to know all about who you're dating and why you're not married? Instead of searching for answers to her questions, politely excuse yourself and let her know you're just fine being solo. Many people feel a responsibility to get their single friends and family a partner, but it's okay to let them know you're not interested.

Accept invitations to parties, dinners. Afraid of going alone to your friend's holiday party? Resist the urge to call your ex boyfriend and ask him to go with you. A wise friend once told me that men and women are attracted to people who go to parties alone - it makes them look confident, mysterious and sexy! Who doesn't want that? Don't turn down the invitation if you can't find a date - instead, embrace the opportunity. You might end up with a date by the end of the night.

Embrace the spirit of the season. I love the holidays, and certain rituals I grew up with make me happy no matter if I'm alone or with someone. I still like to bake cookies, volunteer, and decorate my home. Do you have a special ritual that you do over the holidays, like getting a massage or going out for Chinese food? Have you wanted to volunteer with your local food bank or women's shelter? Now is the time to do what makes you feel good to get in the holiday spirit.

Here are some dating statistics from the POF Blog. I believe these numbers are for 2011 and just concern the United States.

• There are 54 million singles
• Of those 10 percent (5.5 million) are currently using a dating service
• 2.6 million pay for the service leaving 2.9 million that do not.
• Overall 8.8 million have tried online dating

According to the US Census in 2009 there were 95.9 million unmarried people in the US. So I guess about 40 percent of those must be in some sort of common law relationship and just have not married. I believe that the 10 percent figure of people who use dating sites probably has not changed much over the last 5 years. The trick now for dating sites is to get the other 49 million to try online dating.

I heard on the radio today that loneliness is contagious, and like a bad cold you can spread it around.

I wasn't sure if I believed this or not and after a quick search on Google, I found this recent article at The Globe and Mail.

After studying 12,000 people, researches from 3 Universities (Harvard, Chicago and California) concluded:

that lonely respondents “infected” remaining friends with their loneliness before the relationships crumbled, perpetuating a cycle of isolation.

Believe it or not if you are lonely you can affect people (spread your loneliness) up to 3 degrees of separation. At one degree of separation, 52 percent of people have a greater chance of being lonely if they are directly connected to someone who is. At two degrees of separation the chances of you being lonely drops to 25 percent and at three degrees, it is 15 percent. At 4 degrees of separation the effect disappears.

The Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis found that from December 2007 till June 2009, employment of married people fell 3.1 percentage points, while people who are single, employment fell 4.8 percentage points. By August of this year the jobless rate for singles was 13.5 percent while married people was at 6.3 percent.

Experts explain that there are several factors that support the difference in the unemployment rate. Single people tend to have less work experience and education than married people. These traits are more valued to employers during a recession. Someone who is also married will more likely take a lower paid job to support their family than someone who is single and thinks the job is beneath them. Single men and women are also able to move back to their parents home more easily to save on rent if things become tight due to lack of employment.