According to The New York Times’ story last year on the current (and dismal) state of dating culture - dubbed the “Dating Apocalypse” - most Millennials using dating apps are just looking to hook up. In this feature story, we read several personal anecdotes from New York singles who were struggling with Tinder, ghosting, and meeting people who had a general lack of interest in serious relationships, which left us feeling like the world of online dating was scary and hopeless.

Turns out, this isn’t a very accurate portrayal of today’s dating culture.

A new study from one of the largest online dating services Plenty of Fish (POF) released a report this month based on over 800 survey respondents ages 18-33 (who also happen to be Millennials). These findings reveal that an overwhelming majority – 75% of Millennials to be exact – are looking for a serious relationship. This means, most are not looking for one-night stands, but real relationships.

In addition, another recent article in The New York Times flips this notion of hook-up culture on its head. Instead of taking Tinder to task for promoting hook-ups in dating, the reporter interviewed couples who had met on Tinder and later married, and even some couples who were expecting their first child after meeting over the notorious app. The conclusion is that Tinder is much more than a hook-up app, and yields successful matches for many members despite its reputation.

Tinder has been associated with hook-ups and the downfall of dating culture, but single people gravitate to it to meet people outside of their own social circles. It is the app with the largest user base, the app that most people have heard of, and because of its unique position, most people are willing to give it a try – simply because there are so many people using it.

The irony is, while some people are using it as a hook-up app, the majority of daters – including Millennials - are using it to seek out serious relationships. Despite the media claim that daters are stuck in a “casual dating” culture whether they like it or not, singles these days are still looking for good old-fashioned love. Dating apps are just a way of finding the right person, despite the superficial methods of swiping left or right based on a few photos.

Dating app culture might just be about convenience – we are always on our phones, and it’s easier to just swipe through photos rather than spending hours reading lengthy profiles. In fact, most of the long-standing dating sites have now launched apps that are more convenient and user-friendly, with photos front and center.

So the next time you are hesitant to try a dating app because you think that people are only looking for hook-ups, remember that 75% of the people you swipe through are looking for love, just like you. For more on the dating services mentioned you can read our POF review and our Tinder review.

Norway’s consumer authority has spoken out against Tinder’s current terms and conditions by filing a formal complaint against the company.

The Norwegian Consumer Council insists that the popular dating app is not protecting its users, granting sweeping ownership rights and control over users’ data. Some of the terms and conditions Tinder users agree to when downloading the app include allowing Tinder change its terms without notifying users, and allowing the app to delete users’ accounts without justification. The Council also points out that users aren’t allowed to delete their own accounts if they want to (which could allow Tinder to inflate their own numbers by potentially counting inactive profiles).

While these policies are spelled out in Tinder’s current terms and conditions, most people aren’t taking the time to read through or really understand how their data could be used. And Norwegian authorities want to call the company out on the practice.

Another sticking point for Tinder according to the Council is that the minimum user age is listed at 13, which country officials consider too young, especially when it comes to understanding complicated online privacy issues.

While Tinder is arguably the most successful dating app, its popularity soared in part because the app was free for those who downloaded it. Access to data from its user base is one of the ways Tinder can make money. A revenue model they use includes offering targeted (data-driven) marketing.

According to a recent article in Fortune, this isn’t the first complaint about app and social media privacy policies from governments outside the U.S. In France earlier this year, the consumer organization UFC-Que Choisir asked French data protection authority CNIL to investigate dating app Happn over its data-collection practices. And the German antitrust authority launched a complaint against Facebook over its “unfair” terms and conditions, on the premise that it is dominates the social networking market and has an unfair competitive advantage.

While Tinder doesn’t have a European operation, it does offer the app in Norwegian language and it is available in Norway’s app store, so it does have to abide by the country’s regulations when selling to its market.

If Norway’s officials consider the case against the company, it may order Tinder to change its terms and conditions or face penalties. Tinder said it makes every effort to comply with local and national regulations. The company released a statement that read: “If and when authorities bring up larger privacy concerns, we always take them into consideration and, if applicable to our users, take steps to implement any necessary changes. We are committed to protecting our users’ privacy and strive to uphold a fair and trusted privacy policy.”

For more information on this dating app please read our review of Tinder.

eHarmony is offering a 3 day full trial of their service. Just sign up for a subscription from April 21st to April 24th, 2016 and use the coupon code FREE to receive 3 days of full access to eHarmony. This code is valid in the United States and Canada on the eHarmony website and dating apps (iOS and Android). Once the 3 day free trial is over you will then be auto enrolled into a 3 month plan (unless you cancel before the 3 days is over).

eHarmony is one of the top dating services where members find long term relationships. A recent study by Consumers' Research found that 57% of eHarmony users found a relationship, with 29% of eHarmony users relationships lasting longer than 1 month. eHarmony has put a lot of time and effort into developing their in-depth matchmaking algorithm so once you signup as a member take your time and answer the relationship questionnaire. It will take about 30 minutes to do so and once completed you will receive your first set of matches in minutes.

For more information about this popular online dating service that specializes in long-term relationships, you can read our eHarmony review.

You turn to OkCupid for casual dating, Tinder for hookups, eHarmony for long-term love, and Ashley Madison for illicit extracurricular activity.

Or do you?

You may think you know which dating services are best for different kinds of relationships (and you’re probably very opinionated about it), but how do your favorites actually stack up when put to the test? A new survey by Consumers’ Research sought to find the dating app that is most likely to lead to a long-term relationship.

The educational organization looked at four popular online dating services for its research: Tinder, Match, eHarmony, and OkCupid. The two most popular options by far were Tinder and OkCupid, which comes as no surprise to anyone who reads the news. Consumers’ Research also found that tech savvy Millennials prefer to use multiple dating apps, instead of just one, to increase their odds of stumbling across someone special.

Well over half of the survey’s participants reported that they ended up in relationships for at least some period of time after using an online dating site or app. The question is, which service is most effective if you’re looking for a long-term relationship?

1. Match.com: The number one spot went to Match.com by a significant margin. Thirty-eight percent of users said they’d had a relationship that began on the site that lasted longer than a month. Thirty-three percent reported having relationships that lasted longer than six months. You can find our Match review here.
2. OkCupid: OkCupid landed in a respectable second place. Thirty-two percent of users had made it past the month mark with someone they’d met using the service. You can find our OkCupid review here.
3. eHarmony: Although they portray themselves as the go-to destination for serious relationships, eHarmony only secured third. Twenty-nine percent of users reported having a relationship of one month or more. eHarmony is the leader though with the most relationships formed by users of any dating service at 57%. You can find our eHarmony review here.
4. Tinder: In a confirmation of the prevailing sentiment, Tinder scored the lowest for those looking for a relationship that lasts. Only 13% reported relationships beyond the one month mark. You can find our Tinder review here.

The Consumers’ Research survey also examined online harassment. User experiences largely ran along gender lines, with around 57% of female respondents and only 21% of male respondents reporting experiencing harassment. The highest reports of harassment came from Tinder and OkCupid users at 39% and 38%, respectively.

Your best bet for avoiding the frogs and finding the princes (or princesses) is to be outgoing and proactive. The survey showed that while the majority of online daters average fewer than six new attempts to connect per day, those who send more messages end up in relationships more often. Increased interactions are linked with greater likelihood of winding up in relationships (of any length). Moral of the story? Get on Match and start messaging.

You know what they say about first impressions. Choose the wrong profile photo and a potential match will swipe left without ever reading the text. Open with a groan-worthy pickup line and the conversation will end before it’s even started. A new date is sizing you up in seconds, and even the smallest details count.

A recent study of speed dates and online dating profiles found that body language plays an important role in how we evaluate romantic prospects. Subjects who assumed expansive postures with open arms and stretched torsos were almost twice as likely to be rated as attractive, and much more likely to be asked out on a “real” date.

In the new study, published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, Tanya Vacharkulksemsuk and her colleagues examined videos of 144 speed dates from a 2007 event held at Northwestern University. Each date was paired for 4 minutes at a time, and afterward each dater reported their level of interest on a scale of one to 10 for a variety of categories. They also indicated if they would be interested in continuing to pursue any of their dates.

Each video was additionally reviewed by a team of experts who were unaware of the experiment's goals, but were trained to recognize and record behaviors linked to attraction, such as laughing, smiling, and nodding.

Upon examining the videos, a pattern began to emerge. “Within milliseconds, we can pick up a suite of information about a person,” says Vacharkulksemsuk, “with social dominance and hierarchical standing being one of those things.” In the case of romantic entanglements, the same posture appeared over and over again in individuals who were rated as highly attractive.

“In general, we see an enlargement of the amount of space that a person is occupying, in contrast to contractive postures with arms and legs held close to the torso,” explains Vacharkulksemsuk. Open body language signals that you are relaxed, friendly, confident, and trustworthy - all qualities that are typically considered desirable in a partner.

When we meet people in real life, we don’t see them as static. Their body language constantly evolves over the course of an encounter, and our evaluations evolve along with it. Now that online dating is commonplace, we’re often forced to judge based on a fixed image - and not only that, but given the speed at which many singles flip through profiles, we also have to make those judgments more rapidly.

There’s plenty of room for error in that system, and Vacharkulksemsuk notes that determining all the factors involved in those snap judgments won’t be easy, but this study is a step in that direction. Now that you know the importance of this particular body language clue, you can consider it when choosing your next profile photo.

Ghosting is becoming a familiar term in dating. It’s a passive-aggressive way of breaking up with someone, where one partner goes completely silent by not returning calls or answering texts, offering a not-so-subtle rejection of their partner. While this behavior existed long before dating apps were created, it’s only become more common as dating apps have taken off.

A recent survey confirms this trend. Dating website Plenty of Fish (POF), one of the largest dating sites in the world, surveyed 800 Millennials between ages 18-33 in both the U.S. and Canada to understand attitudes and behavior patterns among young daters. Results of the survey showed that an overwhelming majority - 80% of Millennials - have at some point in their dating lives been ghosted.

There are many reasons behind the trend of ghosting. Dating apps do make it easier, since people can be anonymous. Most daters don’t have mutual friends in common when they meet over apps, so they aren’t really held accountable for their actions or behavior. It’s also much easier to ghost someone you may not know very well instead of confronting them directly. The assumption is that it’s easier to ghost someone than than to reject him outright (like it's easier to text than to call), or that the relationship was a casual one and therefore it’s “not a big deal” to just let it disappear.

In fact, “ghosting” seems to be the new trend when ending a relationship, and daters know it will happen. Fifteen percent of survey respondents admitted to scheduling multiple dates in one night, assuming that at least one date wouldn’t work out.

Some other interesting trends the survey discovered:

There’s no “Dating Apocalypse”: Contrary to popular belief, an overwhelming majority - 75% of millennials - use dating apps because they’re looking for a serious relationship. Forty-nine percent identified “just looking to hookup” as the biggest misconception about singles under the age of 30.

Financial difficulties factor into dating and relationships: According to the study, 30% of millennials live at home with their parents, and not surprisingly, 50% say this living situation negatively impacts their love life.

Savvy Singles: 50% millennial singles over the age of 24 have already been dating online for 5 years or more, with the majority of respondents currently using more than one dating app. Twenty-three percent visit an online dating site or app 3-5 times every day. If a date goes well, 20% of millennials won’t even wait one day to set up a second date.

Millenials aren’t just looking for hook-ups and are serious about finding relationships, which is good news. However, many dating app users need a few lessons when it comes to improving their dating behavior. Ghosting isn't the best way to end a new relationship.

For more information on this dating service you can read our POF review.