Profiles

Maybe you’ve heard the statistics, but if not – pay attention, and turn on your spell check. Correct grammar usage and spelling goes a long way when you’re online dating. In fact, according to recent studies by online dating site Match, bad grammar is one of the biggest turn-offs for men and women – a close second behind poor hygiene.

In other words, make sure you know the difference between "your" and "you’re" before you message a potential match.

Website Grammerly did its own collection of data regarding dating and grammar usage, and came up with some interesting findings. As it turns out, people aren’t only aware of grammar mistakes – they pay attention to the specific words you use, too. Some terms are more attractive than others when you’re writing messages or an online dating profile.

For instance, men who use the word “women” rather than “girls” in their messaging are 28% more successful at getting responses. And those who use the word “whom” correctly do even better – they are 31% more successful than those who use it incorrectly.

Men are a little easier on women overall, but there are certain phrases they don’t like. When women use the words “divorce,” “separate,” or “my ex” they receive 4% fewer messages than those who don’t. (So maybe save your dating histories for the actual date, ladies.)

Spelling can be a big deal too, at least for women. Guys – if you have just two spelling errors in your profile, you reduce your chances of a response by 14%. As for the ladies? Men just aren’t so picky – spelling errors don’t affect their chances of getting a response. (Which may explain why women make nearly twice as many spelling, grammar and punctuation mistakes in their messages and profiles than men---it doesn’t seem to matter as much!)

Some other fun stats:

• According to OkCupid, women receive 17 times as many messages as men – which may explain why they can be picky, but don’t have to watch their spelling and grammar mistakes.
• Both men and women rate grammar as more important than confidence in online dating.
• Eighty-eight percent of women judge their dates’ grammar mistakes, compared to 84% who judge their dates by their level of confidence. For men, it was 75% and 69% respectively.
• Men use 21.9% more words than women do in their responses to questions                regarding their online dating profiles.
• Roughly 11% of American adults (24  million people) have used an online dating site or app

Bottom line: check your messages before you hit “send” – it could make a huge difference in your online dating success.

Another new dating app has hit the market to compete with Tinder, the ever-popular app that is both cherished and demonized for changing the landscape of dating. Precisely takes the user-friendly format of Tinder (swiping), and combines it with a clickable menu of over 200 filters across 25 different categories, so you can select descriptions according to your preferences.

Dating sites like OkCupid and Match are two successful yet traditional online dating platforms, and their matching algorithms also use descriptions. However, these sites rely on users answering questions and writing detailed profiles, which can take a lot of time. Precisely aims to take the time-consuming part out, but still maintain the helpful filters.

So instead of writing about who you are or what you want, you can choose to “activate” or include in your profile adjectives that the app provides in a ready-made list. For instance, you can choose descriptors like: “vegetarian,” “blonde,” “curvy,” “freckles,” “tattoos.”

The app provides a variety of personality-based filters in addition to physical descriptors, covering art, fitness, politics, diet and religion, for instance. If your religious or political views are important in your relationships, you can make your beliefs known to others. Or you can choose to not make them part of your filters.

Are you a plus size dater looking for a new and better online dating experience? WooPlus aims to create a friendlier, more enjoyable time for daters who are sick of apps and online dating sites geared towards people with leaner bodies, and are looking for a more accepting environment.

Niche dating sites are a huge part of online dating. While Tinder serves the general dating market, some sites and apps prefer to focus on a certain segment of the market with particular tastes – whether it’s dating people who have the same political beliefs, eating habits, or religious views, for instance. Some dating sites even cater to hobbies, lifestyles and preferences like Star Trek fans, farmers, tattoo lovers, or those who prefer to date redheads.

You might not have known this if you’ve used popular dating app Tinder, but the service secretly calculates a score that ranks the most (and least) desirable people swiping on the service.

And every single Tinder user has a score.

In an article for Fast Company, reporter Austin Carr was interviewing Tinder founder Sean Rad, who let him know this wasn’t some urban myth. In fact, Rad went so far as to admit that not only does each user have a desirability score, but that the company spent more than two months developing the algorithm for rating people. According to Rad, it’s more than a popularity contest of which users get the most swipes or matches, or who has the more attractive photos, but a combination of factors that make a more complex overall view.

Still, the swipes probably have something to do with your desirability score. In fact, every time a Tinder user swipes right or left on you, that is factored into the equation – how often you are liked, versus rejected. And how many times there is a mutual swipe, versus a one-sided rejection or like. Then there are the more intangible factors, like career choice, words used to describe oneself in a profile, and educational background.

Carr got to look at his own desirability score, which was just slightly above average to his dismay. He cautioned his readers to avoid looking at their scores, as they could potentially end up even more self-conscious daters than they were already. Tinder wouldn’t give him any details besides a top line number of how he compares to everyone else using the app. Tinder does have more detailed breakdowns and analyses, but they chose not to share.

While it might be interesting to learn your Tinder desirability score, it doesn’t help if you end up on the lower end of the spectrum. It certainly doesn’t mean anything in terms of your ability to connect with that one special person – people are attracted to one another based on that intangible known as chemistry, for one.

Also, people have a wide array of tastes – what might seem attractive to one Tinder user might turn off another. OkCupid discovered this in its own study, where it researched the most-messaged users. More often than not, the ones with more unusual features tended to get more messages, and more people considered them attractive compared to those who were considered more "ordinarily attractive."

So if you are on Tinder, just keep swiping and dating without worrying about how you stack up against the competition. It’s just an algorithm, after all. For more information on this dating app you can read our Tinder review.

OkCupid has built a reptuation as one of the more open-minded dating services available for singles. In their latest progressive move, the site is adding a feature designed to help users explore nonmonogamy.

The new setting became available for some beta users last December and rolled out site-wide in Januray 2016. Polyamorous daters who are listed as “seeing someone,” “married,” or “in an open relationship” can now link their profiles with their partners' profiles and search for new additions to their relationship.

The decision to add the option for polyamorous users comes after OkCupid noticed an uptick in interest in nonmonogamous relationships. According to the company’s data, 42% of its users would consider dating someone who is already involved in an open or poly relationship. Another 24% say they are “seriously interested” in group sex. Combined, reports The Atlantic, those two numbers represent increases of 8 percentage points from five years ago.

Perhaps more surprisingly, the number of OkCupid users who say they are solely committed to monogamy has fallen to a minority of all users: 44%, down from 56% in 2010.

The trend on OkCupid is reflective of a larger trend throughout the United States. Psychology Today reported in 2014 that "sexually non-monogamous couples in the United States number in the millions." Surveys suggest that 4 to 5 percent of Americans are now involved in polyamorous relationships.

This isn't the first time OkCupid has made headlines for its forward-thinking take on online dating. The site added an “open relationship” option back in 2014. Last year, it increased the number of genders it recognizes to 22. Tinder and Match.com, also owned by OkCupid parent company Match Group, do not yet have plans to add a similar feature for nonmonogamous users.

Outside of Match Group, OkCupid remains a trendsetter. Though specialized dating sites for polyamorous people were already available, this seems to be the first time a mainstream online dating service has offered a feature for nonmonogamous partners. In the past, poly couples resorted to creating confusing joint profiles or describing their arrangement in their bios.

Jimena Almendares, OkCupid’s chief product officer, told The Atlantic the company isn't trying to make a statement – it's merely following the numbers and giving users the tools they need to find the relationships they want.

“Finding your partner is very important,” she said, “you should have the option to express specifically and exactly who you are and what you need.”

For more information on this dating service please read our review of OkCupid.

The New Year is here – and the majority of us seem motivated to make positive changes in our lives. In addition to healthy diets and exercise regimens, many people have also vowed to make changes to find love this year – whether it’s making more time to date, committing to finding a relationship, or even making an attitude adjustment.

So what has been holding you back from pursuing a long-term relationship? Do you find yourself getting frustrated from the online dating process? Do you feel that relationships don’t ever work out for you? Or are you just not meeting the right person?

With dating, we have to get clear about what we want before we can expect a relationship. And that means looking at our online dating profiles and making some changes. After all, it’s your marketing tool – your first introduction to potential dates and your chance to make a good first impression. So why not spend some time on it, so you can attract the kind of person you’d like to meet?

Following are some simple profile changes to make to get 2016 started on the right foot:

Change your photos. This is an easy and effective way to spruce things up in 2016. Look for photos that show your whole body as well as a headshot. Include shots of you doing yoga, surfing, hiking, playing guitar, or whatever else you like to do. People look through photos before reading profiles, so try to tell a story through yours.

Reconsider your handle. People do make snap judgments about handles. If you have a sexually suggestive one, get another – it’s a big turn-off for women. Or if it’s too generic, like John1987, opt instead for one that includes a hobby or favorite song, for instance. Get creative.

Pick a topic and get specific. Instead of including a laundry list of likes and dislikes in your description, try naming a specific thing and telling a story. For instance, if you like to travel, instead of just listing where you’ve been, think of a favorite trip and describe what it was like, or tell a funny story of something that happened to you. The goal is to get potential dates to message you, ask a question, start a conversation.

No generic phrases. Liking to “Netflix and chill” is not a good way to attract a potential relationship – nor is the fact that you are “looking for a partner in crime” or that you “love to laugh.” Doesn’t everyone love to laugh? What tells a story about you is what makes you laugh. Do you like comedy shows, or telling bad jokes, or is there a favorite Instagram feed that makes you giggle? Show that you have interests, where you like to go on the weekends, or the fact that waking up to Rihanna's music helps get you through the work day. Potential dates know that anyone can sit on the couch and watch TV, but they really want to know who you are and what sets you apart. Think of it this way: write phrases that can start conversations.