Tips

New Year's Eve is just around the corner, and this year, there's a movie coming out with the same title that puts the holiday front and center on our minds - especially if we're single. A long list of A-List stars will experience new love thanks to all the romance that's supposed to take place on this night - after all, it's a magical time, right? Not to mention one of the biggest date nights of the year. That's great for Hollywood, but what will most singles experience?

While I love a good romantic comedy, sometimes these kinds of movies put undue pressure on singles to find someone special before the ball drops and champagne toasts are made. But should you be made to feel like your life is missing something because you don't have a date for New Years?

New Year's Eve isn't all about couples and having someone to kiss at midnight. It's about ringing in the New Year - which means new adventures and new people to meet. With all the parties and the festive atmosphere, going out with friends can make for a fun night - no romance involved. And if your friends already have plans? Well, then you should make a point to go solo to that party you've been invited to. While I was never excited to go to parties by myself (I'd much rather go with friends), going solo was how I ended up meeting my husband. Because I didn't have a group of friends to hang out with, I was forced to make small talk and introduce myself to strangers. We talked and he asked me out - the rest just flowed. And it all happened because I went alone to a New Year's party.

The bottom line? You never know what the future holds, but the present is totally in your control. New Year's Eve is a great time to celebrate regardless of your relationship status. So make a point to celebrate it. Following are some ideas, depending on what floats your boat:

Travel. Make plans to visit a friend or family member, or ring in the New Year in an exotic locale you've always wanted to visit. This is a good time to expand your horizons. Take advantage if you want to just get out of town.

Make plans with friends. If you already have a jump on planning your social calendar, that's great! Book your friends for a fun night out downtown or at a favorite club. If that's too expensive, you can always celebrate at someone's house.

Host a party. Why not bring New Year's to you? Have a party at your house and ask each of your friends to invite someone new so you can expand your social circles.

Most importantly, remember that New Year's is about new beginnings. It's not about finding a date so you don't feel alone. Have fun, and enjoy your friends and people you meet. Let the evening take on a life of its own - and see where it leads you.

The holidays are a great time of the year to date. It's easier to meet friends of friends at parties, dinners, and holiday gatherings - which means more opportunities to expand your social network, or to meet someone special.

So what happens if you're at a party and you hit it off with someone new? It's time to make the best possible impression - and there are definitely ways to take advantage of the season. Following are a few tips for making your holiday dating a success - and possibly ring in the New Year with a new love!

Try something new. Instead of the tried-and-true dinner and drinks scenario, opt for more creative options for dates during the holidays. Try ice skating, a carriage ride downtown, a drive down that street where every house has elaborate Christmas lights, or even watching a marathon of holiday movies together. The holiday spirit can be contagious when mixed with a little attraction.

Don't get the family involved. While you might be tempted to invite your new love interest over for Christmas dinner with the family, don't do it. It's best to take things slow and leave the family out of it for the time being - why create added stress? Plan to meet him on your own for a drink or movie afterwards instead!

Curb the holiday spirits. It's easy to get carried away at parties with a few extra cocktails, especially when you're nervous and standing next to someone you're really attracted to. But don't overdo the wine and champagne so you can "loosen up." Pace yourself so you don't do something you'll regret later. Besides, your date will enjoy you more when you can hold a conversation.

No gifting for new relationships. If you've just started dating, there's no reason either of you should expect a gift for the holidays. It puts added pressure on a new romance and it also implies you might be more serious than you are. Leave gifts for later on in the relationship. Just enjoy getting to know each other right now.

Enjoy the season. Accept all of those party invitations and be sure to socialize instead of standing next to the bar waiting for someone interesting to talk to. Parties are much more fun when you make an effort to get to know people, and you may find you click with someone unexpectedly. Take some chances - introduce yourself and try a little flirting. It could lead to your next holiday date.

Happy holidays!

Online dating is a great way to meet other singles. Unfortunately, some people use these sites as a way to take advantage of people. Recently, a widow was swindled out of her life savings by a man on a dating site posing as an Iraq war veteran.

It's important to remember that most online daters are looking for love, even though these scams do happen from time to time. Instead of being fearful that everyone you meet online could potentially harm you - and refusing to use dating sites altogether - know how to be proactive in protecting yourself. There are a few simple warning signs to know if you're dealing with someone who's trying to scam you. Pay attention to these and you'll have a good experience online.

He shows affection, but it's too much, too soon. Many scammers play on people's vulnerabilities. If he knows you're looking for love, that's what he says he'll give you. If he is declaring his affection before you've even met, or before you've exchanged half a dozen emails, be weary. It's likely he's manipulating you.

He has a tragedy he wants to share with you. Many scammers share a contrived hardship with their victims in order to emotionally connect - whether it's losing a house, job, spouse, or whatever. They ask for sympathy, which down the line may turn into asking for money or other things of value to you. Be careful of anyone who tries to gain your sympathy - it's just another form of manipulation.

He puts off meeting you. If he lives in another country, or work has gotten too busy, or other obligations are preventing him from meeting you in person, this is a giant red flag. Likely he's buying time and doesn't have any intention of meeting you at all.

He asks for money. This should be a giveaway, but some online daters become emotionally attached and start doing things that normally they wouldn't. Scammers may email regularly and shower you with compliments and tales of woe, but please don't mistake this for knowing who they really are. If any of your dates ask for money, run the other way.

He seems too good to be true. We all have intuition, but sometimes we don't want to pay attention to that little voice inside saying, "this person isn't good for you" or "he's not who he says he is." If you've convinced yourself that your love interest is different, think again. If he seems too good to be true, he probably is.

Online dating can seem like a big sales game. You're trying to impress a bunch of strangers who don't know anything about you. You want to be noticed, to find romance, to find partnership, or just dip your toe in the dating pool again. Whatever your motivation, it's easy to fall into the trap of misrepresenting yourself in order to appear more attractive. Most of the time, this works against you.

The old adage "just be yourself" really sets you apart from the pack. Many people make the mistake of trying to conform to what they think other singles are looking for, which leads to generic profiles, inaccurate depictions, and not much information about who you are, what your passion is, or anything else that can be a conversation starter or way to connect.

A few tips for being yourself:

Post recent photos. According to statistics, many people post photos that are more than a year old. While you may look tanned, fit and glowing from last year's vacation in Mexico, is that really who you are in your day-to-day life? Instead, have a friend take a good photo if you don't have anything from the last couple of months. If you've had the same profile picture for several months, change it. It will put your profile in the front lines of other's searches when you update.

Show off your passion. If you love playing electric guitar, cooking, mountain biking, or rowing, include a photo and a couple of sentences about your passion. This is something that others can connect with - and often it's easier to communicate in a photo rather than just including it in your profile description, because people in a hurry often just flip through photos and glance over descriptions. This is a way to make sure you get them to take a second look.

Don't hide your flaws. OKCupid came out with a study earlier this year that showed if men disagree over whether or not a woman is hot, she fares better with messages and responses than women who are generically considered "attractive." Most of the time, there was a particular feature, like a large nose or curvy hips, that some men found really attractive and others didn't. The thing to remember is, when you meet someone in person, they will notice what you tried to hide in photographs. So why not go out with the ones that find your perceived flaws really hot from the start?

Get a friend to help. If you feel you can't be objective about all your great qualities, enlist a friend to help write your profile and choose photos. Sometimes it can feel overwhelming to try and figure out how to best "sell" yourself, but really - people don't want to read a long list of attributes. They want to find something to help them connect with you. Remember, dating is all about connection. So finding ways to help people want to learn more about you - through humor, storytelling, or talking about your passions - are all helpful in your search for love online.

Dating can be intimidating, especially if you've just come out of a long-term relationship. It's normal to worry about everything from what you'll wear to what you'll say or even how attractive others will find you. It can make you doubt yourself and turn into somewhat of a narcissist. Who doesn't want to put his best foot forward when meeting someone for the first time?

There are a few simple steps to improving your confidence when it comes to dating. We can't all be Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt, but we can do our best to boost our attractiveness meters and feel like a million bucks - and believe me, your dates will notice.

Dress for success. Nothing improves dating confidence more than when you know you look good. Wear the dress that flatters you most. Add heels and a nice top to your jeans. Wear a jacket over your black t-shirt. Dressing up a bit for a date shows the person you're meeting that you take care of yourself and make an effort. It speaks volumes for making a good first impression. So even if you're meeting for coffee on a Sunday afternoon, put a little effort in - resist showing up in flip flops and torn jeans.

Mind your manners. You don't have to open doors for your date (although this is a simple, elegant move), but do remember the small things - like putting your cell phone away and engaging in conversation. If you're distracted and looking around at other women in the restaurant, or talking about yourself without asking her questions, these are big turn-offs.

Respect everyone around you. Treat everyone you encounter on your date with respect: the valet, the waiter, the bartender, the hostess. Remember to tip well. These small steps will go far in endearing you to your date - especially when she doesn't know you - so pay attention to how you treat the people around you.

Exercise. No, you don't have to be a model or body builder to be able to successfully date, but you do have to show an interest in keeping fit. Start an exercise regime you can stick to - this will do wonders for your self-confidence, not to mention give you an extra lift from all those endorphins. Your date will notice.

Adjust your attitude. Most daters want to go out with someone who makes them feel good - someone who can laugh or has a generally optimistic nature. If you complain a lot about work, or past dates, or your exes when you get nervous and you're trying to connect with your date, please stop! Instead, ask questions or talk about your passions - make the date a positive experience rather than a depressing one.

Take risks. Nothing is more important in dating than going outside of your comfort zone and taking a few risks. Talk to the cute woman in line for coffee, or the guy drinking his beer alone at the bar. There's no harm in approaching, and it boosts your overall confidence in the long run, even if you're met with a few rejections. You never know when or how you may meet someone special.

Good luck and get out there!

Sometimes a break-up can make us feel like the world is crashing down around us. Maybe you dated your ex for a long time, or perhaps you had a deep friendship together and don't want to let that go. Have you thought about being friends, once you've gotten over the initial hurt?

I'm not an advocate of maintaining friendships with exes, mostly because emotions are often raw and vulnerable and old wounds can resurface easily. The more distance and time you can put between you and your ex, the easier your path to true healing and moving on. In some cases, a friendship will come after a broken heart, but often this isn't the case.

Here are some reasons why it's not a good idea to try and keep a platonic friendship going:

Someone was dumped. While some relationships come to an end through mutual agreement, often one person initiates it. The dumpee is usually the one feeling hurt and rejected, which makes every interaction with an ex that much harder to get over. Instead of trying to form a friendship with your ex if you were dumped, it's better to keep your distance and let time apart do the work. If you were the one doing the dumping, your ex could interpret your good intentions of being friends as trying to rekindle romantic interest. Don't go down that road.

Lingering romantic feelings. While you might tell yourself that your friendship can be platonic, that you're over him or her, this isn't always the case. Perhaps some part of you or your ex secretly wishes to get back together. Maybe you or your ex is hoping for the right moment alone together, so neither of you truly heals and moves on.

Dating other people. Sooner or later it's bound to happen - your ex starts posting pictures of his new girlfriend on Facebook. (You're still friends of course, so you have access to all his posts.) She is beautiful and they look very happy together. You thought you'd moved on, but this glaring new development has thrown you for a loop. Rather than put yourself in the awkward position of watching him move on before you've truly gotten over him, keep your distance. Don't be his Facebook friend, either. At the very least, filter his posts from your newsfeed.

Some ex-couples do manage to maintain friendships, but my advice is still to let time do the healing. Keep your distance. There's no need to call or invite him to your parties, or to check in with him and see what he's up to. Give yourself the time and space to move on - and allow him the same.