Tips

If you're feeling that online dating isn't working for you - whether it's because your matches are non-existent or you seem to attract men who aren't right for you - take heart. The answer is easily fixable. But it requires changing up your profile and expanding your search.

Not every man you meet is going to make you swoon (admit it - we all seem to look for chemistry first when we meet someone). You will have good dates and bad dates like everyone else, regardless of whether you meet through an online dating site or through some other method. The key is to keep things in perspective, be open to new experiences, and maintain a positive attitude.

And if you want to grab a man's attention online? You have to have a great profile. Following are some tips for you to help it out:

Post a variety of pictures. Let's face it, men are visual creatures, especially when searching through online dating sites. A woman has to catch his eye. But don't try to be someone you're not - men have different tastes so don't think they are all looking for a certain "type." Use current pictures (taken within the last six months), and ask a friend to take some if you don't have any you like. Have a headshot, a body shot (or they think you're hiding something), and shots of you doing things - whether it's hiking, painting, or playing soccer. And smile.

Be creative. Men and women could both use some improvement in this area. Don't be tempted to use the tired online dating phrases like "I want to find my best friend" or "I love to travel." Instead, state in a sentence or two where you've traveled or where you'd like to go, so you can leave room open for conversation. If you're funny, be funny in your profile. Show off your quirks. Your unique personality has to shine through to separate you from all the other women.

Throw out your "list." If you have standards that just aren't being met (i.e. he has to be at least six feet tall, have a full head of hair, work as a lawyer, be athletic), or any number of particular traits that don't have much to do with how you want him to treat you in the relationship, rethink your list. Is his height as important as his ability to communicate well, or that he's affectionate and kind?

Communicate. Most women feel that a man has to contact them first, but if you see someone who interests you, please reach out! Or if there's a man who has sent you an email, write him back in a timely way. The first step in any relationship is communication. Try to withhold any judgment until you get to know him a little better. After all, we don't always convey our feelings accurately over email or text. Practice keeping an open mind.

Have you had bad luck with online dating? Maybe you haven't had as many matches as you'd hoped for, or maybe too few women have responded to you. If these are your problems, there's a simple fix: it's time to revamp your profile.

In addition to posting pictures that are an accurate reflection of who you are (making sure they are recent, depict you in different ways - like a headshot as well as a surfing shot, and don't include ex-girlfriends or a gang of friends around you), there are a few ways to tweak that profile to get more responses:

Don't be so brief. Instead of three-word descriptions in your profile, or an email that just says, "what's up?" be a little more conversational. Otherwise, the people viewing your profile or reading your emails will have no information to go on. When someone doesn't pique your interest from the beginning, why would you go back and reconsider?

Be original. If you're funny, then show it. If you're adventurous, post pictures of yourself jumping out of airplanes. If you're into music, talk about your playlist or post a photo of yourself playing guitar. If you want to start a conversation, you have to create a topic. With online dating, it's a visual thing - the first impression is your profile, so be creative and true to yourself. (No more typical phrases like "I enjoy long walks on the beach" or "I'm just a nice, easy-going guy" please.)

Be open. If you find that you're not getting many matches or responses to your emails, take another look at your restrictions. Are the age filters you are working with realistic? If you're 40 and only want to date women in their twenties, you're missing out on a whole pool of great candidates. Will you only consider certain types of women, like athletic or religious or within a ten-mile radius of where you live? Try branching out and seeing what happens. You only increase your potential dates and opportunities when you are less restrictive with your filters.

Leave the past in the past. Don't try and list all the things you don't want in a partner in your profile. Maybe you have dated some crazy or clingy women. Don't make those issues the focus of your profile (i.e. writing "no drama queens for me"). In fact, don't mention those issues at all - or you will likely attract the same type of women. Instead, think about your future and what you want going forward.

Move on. If you haven't heard back from a woman who really caught your eye, don't keep emailing her. It's time to let go and move on. Instead of emailing one person at a time, try emailing ten or twenty and see what happens. Online dating is all about reaching out and seeing what happens. Don't take rejection personally because it happens a lot - and to everyone. Just move on to the next - no hurt feelings.

We all have a social media presence, so it's hard not to share the inner workings of our everyday lives. But when is it too much?

When you're dating, you're easily found on Facebook, Twitter, or any number of sites you may have a virtual presence. So it's good to pay attention to what you put out there, not only for your professional life but also for your personal. Would somebody looking to date you get the wrong impression of who you are? Unless you want to explain yourself, it's best to keep the tirades and TMI status updates to yourself, or at least protect your tweets.

Following are some tips to keep your personal life from getting too personal on Twitter:

Don't overshare. It's easy to become addicted and give your followers a play-by-play of your every move during the day, but is it necessary? Oversharing can kill any sense of romance, and make your dates wonder if you spend time doing anything else.

Don't tweet your anger. Maybe one of the people you follow tweeted something that made you angry, so you get in a Twitter-fight with him, barbs going back and forth. Before your date mistakes you for Charlie Sheen or someone else with an anger issue who can't let something go, don't let your tweets get out of control even if you think you're being funny. Keep your comments in line.

Don't post your relationship status updates. Sure, you might be going on five dates over the next three days, but your dates probably don't want to hear about it. Keep the plans of your dates and when you have them out of the social media world. Also, don't keep switching back and forth from "It's complicated" to "in a relationship" on Facebook. Talk about it and decide what you'll post together, or don't post your status at all.

Don't tweet while on a date. This is such a party foul. I had a friend who did this, calling her date boring and heavier than his picture. When she got up to use the bathroom, he told her that he checked his Twitter account and saw what she posted. She was embarrassed, and so was he. Game over.

Don't rant about your dates. This might be obvious, but worth mentioning. If you have a series of bad dates and you tweet, blog, or Facebook details about them, you're only setting yourself up for future problems. Everyone has bad dates, but if you turn your accounts into a bad date confessional, you could be a turn-off to potentially great dates. After all, they won't want you writing about them.

For more information on how to use these social networks for dating, you can read our Facebook.com review and our Twitter.com review

Dates can be nerve-wracking. You don't know what to expect or if there will be chemistry, and you spend a lot of time wondering what your date thinks of you. There's so much anticipation and build-up that comes with dating that when little things go wrong, it can make you even more nervous and upset.

Have you ever been on a date where he or she showed up an hour late, or more? Did she call to let you know he was stuck in traffic, or did she just keep you waiting? Did you feel a sense of indignation? Did he apologize and explain, or did he just assume nothing was wrong and started conversation as though nothing had happened?

I've been on a few dates where I was kept waiting without a phone call, and it didn't feel good. In fact, I felt like I was last on my date's priority list, which doesn't bode well for the future of the relationship. How someone treats you on the first few dates can be a good indicator of how he'll treat you as time goes on. It doesn't get better, but it can get worse.

While I'm all for giving people a real chance on every date, if someone is being disrespectful that's not a good sign of things to come - and you should run in the other direction. Keeping someone waiting for an hour without calling (with no apologies or explanations) is disrespectful.

Some other warning signs that he's being disrespectful:

If he criticizes - a lot. If your date takes every opportunity to be critical or say nasty things about other people, chances are he will eventually say them about you. Do you want to be subjected to this kind of behavior?

If he treats the waitstaff poorly. If he refuses to leave a decent tip, or talks down to the people serving you when you're on a date, proceed with caution. A good man or woman treats everyone as a human being.

If he talks about his terrible exes or bad dates. Maybe he makes you laugh with his stories about bad dates or all of his crazy exes, but be warned: you may be next on his list. Steer clear of men (or women) who do nothing but complain about previous partners. For one, you don't need to hear about it (especially on a first date), and you don't want to date someone who only finds fault with other people, never himself.

If he doesn't listen. While some men get nervous and tend to talk a lot on dates, there's a difference between them and someone who actively doesn't listen. If he's too busy talking about himself or looking around at the other women walking by to pay attention to your questions or anything else you're saying, this is a red flag. Move on.

You asked for her number and now you're going out on your first date together. She's really attractive, so you're feeling nervous. You want to make a good impression and stand out from the other guys she might be dating. (Or maybe you just don't want to screw things up.)

Following are some tips to ensure your date goes smoothly and you've got her interested in seeing you again...and again:

Planning. The first step in a successful date happens before you even leave the house. Planning the date is key. If you try to wing it and ask her where she wants to go or what she wants to do when you pick her up, you've lost before you've even started. If you've had a few conversations, hopefully you've picked up on some things she likes - whether it's going for cocktails or hiking on a Saturday morning. If you haven't don't worry - just make sure you pick a place to go and don't put the work on her. Being a planner means you're confident and you're taking care of things. A woman likes these traits in any man.

Dress for success. There's no need for expensive clothes, but if you want to impress a girl, don't show up to your first date wearing your comfortable shorts and flip flops (unless you're going to the beach). Put some effort into how you look, because she will. If you aren't sure, then ask a female friend to help you out.

Engage in conversation. All this means is - listen to her and ask questions. This isn't a job interview, so don't go into a date with a list of your qualifications or try to "sell" her on how great a guy you are. Just be present - ask questions and listen to her answers. This will go a long way in building up a connection, which is a lot more important to most women than your resume.

Don't go in for the kiss unless you know she wants it. I know it's tempting, but don't try and save a date that's not going so well by kissing her or trying to get physical. A woman has to feel the attraction first. If you aren't sure if she'll go for a kiss, then don't do it. Instead, ask her out on the next date - and mention someplace she likes to go (if you asked her during the date you'll have a few ideas).

Follow up. At the end of the date, ask her out. Then make specific plans (like picking a day and having an idea of where to go.) Text her afterwards that you enjoyed the date. The more consistent you are with following up, the more likely she'll agree to that second date.

When you're interested in a man, you want to make the best impression possible so things don't fizzle out before you've even gotten started. So what can you do to improve your chances? I think that attraction is organic, but relationships progress when two people get to know each other and feel they are compatible. So, it's time to be honest about some negative habits you might be displaying that might make a great guy hesitate.

In case you're wondering - please know I'm not talking about reinventing your image, ladies. Turn-offs have less to do with your physical appearance and everything to do with how you come across when you interact and engage with a man. Following are some turn-offs that have most men moving on to the next.

Lying or manipulating. Honesty is one of the most important things a man looks for in a good relationship. If you begin by lying or being secretive about your life, then there's no place to build a foundation of trust, and no real future. If you're dating other men, then let him know. There's nothing wrong with either of you dating others until you become serious. Just don't hide it.

Anger and mood swings. It's natural to get angry from time to time, but if anger is your dominant emotion, or if you tend to bottle it up and then let it out in a tirade of emotional outbursts, this is not healthy for any relationship. Keep an open line of communication, and don't hold grudges or keep bringing up mistakes or trangressions of your past relationships. He's not your ex.

Not treating others with respect. I paid attention to how my dates treated waiters and bartenders. I don't have much patience for people who make others feel bad or inferior; it's just mean behavior. Everyone wants to be treated with respect. If you don't show this to everyone around you then your date may wonder if you'll treat him poorly, too.

High maintenance. There's no need to wear fake eyelashes and hair extensions on your dates, or to cop an attitude that you're better than other women. Most men prefer a woman's natural features, and assume you're going to be high maintenance if you come across looking too made up or act too aggressively. They will shy away from women who seem too needy or overbearing.

Unhappy with your circumstances. Many of us women are always looking for something - whether it's success in our careers, a husband, romance, or recognition of some sort. Maybe you haven't achieved some of these goals, but if you dwell in what you don't have instead of focusing on what you do, then you may appear unhappy or - and I don't like this term - "jaded" to your dates. I encourage you to approach each date as a new experience, and to adopt an outlook of gratitude for what you have accomplished and what you currently have in your life. Shifting your perspective will help with all of the men you meet, and will bring you more quickly towards a fulfilling relationship.