Statistics

When it comes to dating with an age difference, there's usually only one story told: men love younger women, and women love older men.

Yeah, it's true - some men do want to date younger women and some women do only go for older men - but it's not the full story, and it's time we recognized that there's more to May-December dating than one unscientific-but-still-predominant view.

AYI.com (Are You Interested?), a dating service that uses Facebook to pair people based on interests, has pulled data from its 68 million downloads and 20 million Facebook profiles to analyze what it takes to make a successful match. Their experiment focused in on the 1 million recommended pairings in a specific population of 35,942 users ages 30 to 49.

AYI's most surprising finding was this: their female subscribers were five times more likely to show interest in men who were five years their junior than men who were five years older. The old narrative is outdated and inaccurate.

Well, sort of. Men do still like dating younger women, as the AYI study proved. Among the 26,434 men between the ages of 30 and 49 who were studied, 42% said they wouldn't even consider dating a woman if she was older than them. If, however, an older woman contacted them first, they admitted they wouldn't necessarily turn her down. AYI's data shows that a man is only 22% less likely to respond to an older woman than to a younger woman if she is the one who initiates contact.

What gives, guys? If you think older women are an easy target with no other options - and it doesn't require any preliminary effort on your part - you'll go for it, but otherwise you won't go anywhere near them? That doesn't sound like the progressive society I like to think I live in.

There are a few theories that explain why AYI's study turned up its findings. Once upon a time, AYI analysts think, young women marrying older men had an appeal based on wealth. While there are still plenty of women who like the idea of marrying for money, younger women are now inundated with requests from older men on dating sites and the myth of the Sugar Daddy is never as glamourous as it seems.

A 2008 study published in the journal Psychology of Women Quarterly found that women who are 10 or more years older than their partner are more satisfied and more committed to their relationships than women who are the same age or younger than their partners. So guys...don't limit yourself to younger women, and girls...don't be afraid of dating younger men.

Honesty may be the best policy, but it isn't always the policy adopted by online daters. Far from it, in some cases.

According to WhatsYourPrice.com founder and CEO Brandon Wade, lying about age or income are the most well-known fibs told on online dating profiles. But a new survey from his site reveals a less-common online lie: one in three dads lie on their online dating profiles about having kids.

A Father's Day survey of 2,500 male members of WhatsYourPrice.com found that approximately 32% have previously lied about having kids. The data looks like this:

• Total Average (2,500 surveyed): 32% lied
• Men Under 30 (1,250 surveyed): 51% lied
• Men Over 30: (1,250 surveyed): 12% lied

The most common types of lies were:

• Men claiming they didn't have kids: 96%
• Men claiming they do have kids: 3%
• Men claiming they have more/less kids: less than 1%

The survey also found that younger men are more likely to like about being dads than men who are over the age of 30. Wade posits that older men are not only more mature, but also more comfortable with the idea of being a parent. Older men no longer fear that their children will prevent them from being accepted by women.

The data all comes down to rejection, Wade suggests. The more afraid a man is that he will be turned down by a potential date, the more willing he will be to lie about himself. Of course, Wade also warns that lying "is actually a sure way of losing a partner" and notes that "Honesty is the most sexy thing when it comes to dating."

Fortunately, Wade believes a better world is on its way for dating dads. Single parents are more common than ever before, and parenthood is celebrated in today's society. Many women believe that a man who has a child is more mature and more capable of maintaining a long-term relationship than a man who has never had that kind of responsibility.

"With those who are honest, you're going to attract women who don't mind the fact that you are a parent or a father," Wade adds. "It's sort of a strange oxymoron thing: these guys think that by lying they actually get better results, when in fact the opposite is true."

That's nice and all, but...is it just me, or was that survey a really crummy way to celebrate Father's Day?

Is eHarmony the secret to a happy marriage?

eHarmony certainly thinks so.

We've been hearing a lot lately about the 'landmark' new study that says marriages that begin online are longer and more fulfilling than marriages that begin offline. We've also heard plenty about the source of the study's funding: eHarmony.

And here's another crazy coincidence: the eHarmony-funded study also found that eHarmony is the best online dating site for long-term relationships. How unexpected!

Ok, all joking aside, eHarmony swears it wasn't involved in any of the data analysis and all the findings are completely objective. A study is a study, and the scientific side of my brain can't resist the urge to take a look at the research (biased though it may be). So let's dive in...

Where are couples meeting these days?

• 16% use online dating.
• 14% work together.
• 12% meet through friends.
• Others meet through social networking sites, school, and social gatherings (7% each).

Where else do people meet?

• Offline, couples meet in bars or clubs, through family members, at places of worship, and on blind dates.
• Online, couples meet in chat rooms, through other online communities, by instant messaging, and while playing multiplayer online games.

Where should you meet if you're looking for a long-term relationship?

• eHarmony, of course, ranks number one.
• "All other dating" comes in second, followed by "All other online."
• "All other" comes in last place.

Which dating site is responsible for the most happy marriages?

• Surprise, surprise - eHarmony is #1 again with 25.04% of marriages.
• Match.com is a close second with 24.34%.
• An assortment of small sites are responsible for 24.64% of online marriages.
• 13.09% are unspecified.
• 7.21% come from Yahoo! Personals.
• 5.71% start on Plenty of Fish.

On the flip side, what's the rate of break-up and divorce among recent marriages?

• 7.70% of recently-ended relationships began offline.
• 6.89% started on a dating site that isn't eHarmony.
• 6.23% began elsewhere online.
• And - naturally - only 3.86% of recent break-ups and divorces began on eHarmony.

Why do eHarmony couples have such a leg up on the competition? They say it's because:

• We're in love.
• We trust each other.
• We are happy.
• We are compatible.
• We have chemistry.

And it totally has nothing to do with the fact that eHarmony paid for the study. At all. What could possibly have put a wacky idea like that into your head?

See the infographic here and to find out more about this service you can read our eHarmony review.

There are a lot of conflicting rules floating around about texting and dating - no wonder people find it so confusing. Do you text right away to show you're interested, or do you wait to show you're not so available? The answer is not always clear, so what should you do?

According to a recent study by Flirt.com, we shouldn't sweat it so much - and we shouldn't stick to the rules! Men and women view texting practices differently. And apparently, the men are much more open to the women they date reaching out to them.

Forty-nine percent of men and 39% of women will text a date the next day to let him/her know they had a nice time. However, 20% of women are still sticking to the old adage of waiting for him to text first (compared to only 5% of the guys).

Even though we don't have to worry about the three-day waiting period to call someone back, the study found it is good to be concerned about how frequently you're texting your date. Texting habits mean different things to each gender. For the women, if a guy sends more than ten texts a day she considers it to be creepy. Men on the other hand are more than happy to have her text - with almost half saying she should text as much as she wants.

Are you worried about looking too available? There's no need, ladies. A whopping 82% of men surveyed said they would be happy if after they suggested a date a woman let him know she was available to go out any night that week. Not so for the ladies. Thirty-eight percent of women said they'd be freaked out if a man made himself too available.

And how do you sign off? Is it too risky to add an "xo" to the end of a text, maybe as a flirtation? According to the study, 48% of men and 41% of women aren't afraid of signing off with a little kiss. But steer clear of being too "cutesy." Almost 25% of men think that smiley faces are childish.

And what about the biggest complication when it comes to texting - whether or not you should break up with someone over text? Apparently women are a little more cold-hearted. Seventeen percent of them would break up with someone over text, compared to just 13% of men.

Flirt.com surveyed over 2,000 of its members for the study.

Looking for new ways to attract men? Well, if you're inked (or thinking about it), a new study finds that men are more than twice as likely to approach a woman with tattoos.

A study from the Université de Bretagne-Sud found that men consider women with tattoos more approachable, but also more promiscuous. They admitted they would be more interested and likely to talk to her if they thought they could have sex with her right away.

For the study, researchers had 31 men identify the 11 "most attractive" participants from a pool of 58 candidates. The chosen participants would then visit area beaches - 10 trips each with a temporary tattoo and 10 without.

The tattoo the women used were the same, based on the typical tattoo of college-aged women: a butterfly on the small of the back.

The women with ink were solicited 23.67 percent of the time, but when the same women didn't have tattoos, that average dropped to 10 percent.

It turns out that how quickly a man approaches a woman was also affected by whether or not she was inked. For women with tattoos, the average time it took for a man to approach was 23 minutes compared to 35 minutes without a tattoo.

As part of the study, a male researcher at the same location would approach young men who were near the female participants in the study. The men were asked to rate the likelihood of the woman agreeing to a first date and having sex on a first date. Researchers agreed the evidence was clear after speaking with them: men see tattooed women as more promiscuous, which was a compelling reason they had to approach.

If you're already inked and aren't interested in hooking up with men, don't fret. While this study might point to potential problems with men hitting on you, you're the one in control here. You put boundaries in place on your dates, not the men you date.

And if you're not sporting any tattoos? Don't get one just so guys will be more willing to approach you.

We all make choices about how to present ourselves when we're dating, so be careful if you might be sending out the wrong message. In the same way tattoos might indicate promiscuity, so can revealing clothing, or being overly flirtatious. You'll have better success in the long run to be true to yourself and your own style, and own it.

It's the age-old question: can men and women be friends without any sexual urges or entanglements? This has been a subject of contention over the years, depicted in many movies from When Harry Met Sally to Friends with Benefits.

A new study has shed some light on the subject, affirming that it is difficult for men and women to be friends without any romantic feelings. At least, it's more difficult for men.

Online social dating site Canoodle.com surveyed 1,500 singles to find out where they stood, and while only 27% of women admitted to harboring feelings for a male friend, a whopping 56% of men said they'd want to be more than friends with their female buds!

For those of you wondering whether or not you should make the move and confess your feelings, the odds are in your favor. Sixty percent of men surveyed said they'd successfully turned their friendships into romantic relationships, and women came in with a 44% success rate.

However, if you have sex and then regret it, you may have some problems. Only 38% of women said it's possible to have sex and then go back to being friends. Fortunately, men don't feel the same way. A majority 52% of men said they'd be totally cool with being friends again after sex.

While this study does shed some light on the subject, it is a difficult situation. Most people are afraid to jeopardize a friendship, especially if they have a long history together, or have seen each other through other relationships that didn't last. Would it be better to throw caution to the wind and confess your feelings to your friend? What if he didn't feel the same? Or if he did, what if your relationship didn't work out in the long run?

These are all risks that we take in life. If you have strong feelings for someone, you owe it to yourself (and to your friendship) to address them, because chances are the other person is already aware. It's hard to hide romantic attraction, no matter how discreet you think you're being. It's better to be honest and move forward from there.

If you confess and your friend isn't interested, don't despair. If she's a good, true friend, you will likely stay friends even if you take a little time apart to move past it.

And if you confess and your friend is totally into you too? Even better, don't you think?