The Roadmap to Online Dating Success, Part 1: Choosing Your Site

Choose one or two dating sites, no more. I recommend one free and one paid, but that’s up to you and your budget. Why two sites? You’ll find that the vibe and the membership of your sites will be a bit different and eventually, you’ll figure out which one works best for you. Oftentimes, people start with one site and throw up their hands in frustration after three months of little to no luck. “Online dating sucks!” they claim. “The people I want to date don’t write me back and the people who write me I wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole!”

I tried several sites when I was making my rounds as a single girl looking for love. I found that Match provided the best results for me, eHarmony often matched me with the same folks I found on Match (for double the price!), PlentyOfFish was full of folks wanting no-strings sex, PerfectMatch didn’t live up to its name, and OkCupid just didn’t quite have the right people.

Your mileage, of course, will vary. I have clients for whom the exact opposite is true. Match and eHarmony don’t have the right people and OkCupid is swarming with folks that they are attracted to and want to date. Don’t judge a dating site by the review of one or two people who found it useless for them. Get a balanced view by reading and asking around before choosing two sites to try. Don’t forget to look for special coupons for free weeks!

Sites I recommend include:

• Traditional Online Dating: Match.com (read Review)
• Free Online Dating: OkCupid (read Review)
• Matchmaking/Personality Test Based Online Dating: Chemistry (read Review), eHarmony (read Review)
• Niche/Religious Online Dating: SoulGeek (geek dating), ChristianCafe (Christian Dating), JDate (Jewish dating)

Just because I don’t personally recommend a site doesn’t mean it’s not good. My biggest advice would be to avoid the tiny niche and white label dating sites (see Story). Stick with the well-known sites, pick two sites to focus your attention on, and start writing that profile!

Related Stories:
The Roadmap to Online Dating Success, Part 2: The Perfect Profile
The Roadmap to Online Dating Success, Part 3: Before You Send Any Emails
The Roadmap to Online Dating Success, Part 4: Emails and Winks
The Roadmap to Online Dating Success, Part 5: The Daily Grind