General News

The Oxford Internet Institute (OII) recently conducted an online survey with 12,000 couples in 18 countries to examine modern dating habits and ideology. The participants all had regular Internet access, and were asked questions about whether or not they had visited online dating sites, if they had used other online services for relationships, and where else they would consider looking for a partner. All questions related to the period of time from 1997 to 2009.

Researchers found that, although technology is generally thought of as the province of the young, middle-aged men and women (40-69) are benefitting most from online dating. After 1996, this demographic was the most likely to use online dating sites. 36% revealed that they found their current partner online, in contrast to only 23% of 18-to-40 year olds who said that they had found a relationship via the Internet. Participants in the higher age range of the study did not fare so well - only 2 began a relationship in their 70s, and neither had used the Internet to do so.

Online dating sites aren't the only way people are using the Net to find love. The Oxford team found that, for people who began their relationship in the years before 2000, less than 10% had met their partners using a social networking site. By 2005, however, that number had more than doubled (21%).

Findings like these clearly indicate that using the Internet to find a partner is not simply a fad - the Internet has fundamentally changed the way we think of dating and relationships. Dr. Bernie Hogan, a Research Fellow at the OII and a co-author of the study, believes that although "Finding your partner online was once regarded as a bit of a novelty," "this survey suggests it has become a common if not dominant way of meeting new partners, particularly if you are between 40 and 70 years old." Traditional meeting methods, like church events, family get togethers, and activities centered around shared hobbies and interests, are now showing a slight decline in popularity, as online dating site use becomes increasingly widespread.

Despite the noticeable spike in online dating, however, offline dating is far from abandoned. The majority of the sample of this study reported meeting their partners in person, using more conventional means like mutual friends (67%) or playing the field at bars and clubs (69%). Professor William Dutton, Hogan's co-author and the director of the OII, sums up the relationship between online and offline dating like this:

"When you ask the question 'How did you meet?' the most likely answer is still 'through mutual friends' or 'at a club or bar.' But this study suggests there has been a noticeable shift in dating strategies. Men and women are seeing the internet as a new place to meet...[and]...A growing number now view dating as a distinct and intentional activity with its own set of contexts and conventions. The popularity of online dating seems largely down to its accessibility and the fact that people seem comfortable disclosing what appear to be personal details in a "pseudo-anonymous" online setting."

Facebook recently added two new relationship statuses in which people can now select for their profile. Facebook members in the United States, Canada, United Kingdom, Australia and France now have the option to choose "In a civil union" or "In a domestic partnership".

Facebook has about 600 million members worldwide now. In North America there are a total of 11 relationship statuses. These include "Single", "In a relationship", "Engaged", "Married", "It's complicated", "In an open relationship", "Widowed", "Separated", "Divorced", "In a civil union" and "In a domestic partnership".

For more on the story you can read SFGate and to find out more on how to use this social network to find dates, check out our review of Facebook.com.

I have been reviewing Match.com again recently and found a few mail message features that I had missed. It looks like both of these features where added in the first half of 2010 (at least that was when the information was added to help).

VIP Email

A Very Interested Person or VIP Email message can be sent by a subscriber to indicate that they are particularly interested in the person who is receiving the message. What makes this email different is that a Match.com member can send only one a week. With a VIP Email, Email Read Notification is included for free (there usually is an upgrade charge for this). The message will also be bolded and highlighted green in the receivers email box so it is easier to identify. Plus, your profile will be highlighted on the receivers Match.com's Connections page for 30 days.

Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist at Rutgers university and an adviser to Chemistry.com, knows that when it comes to love, the Internet is a tool that's too valuable to waste. Her new book, the most recent of 5 publications, called "Why Him? Why Her?: How to Find and Keep Lasting Love" explores the results of 35 years of research on the biological origins of lust, romantic attraction, and deep attachment.

Online dating, Fisher believes, is a viable choice for all love-seekers. It's "a cheap, easy, safe way to meet people," she recently told The Baltimore Sun, that doesn't deserve the stigma it's acquired. "They shouldn't call them dating sites. They should call them introducing sites," she offers, as a way to help online dating become less looked down upon and even more mainstream. "They provide the newest way to do the same old thing, which is places to meet people," she adds, so why not take a chance on finding your match online?

Fisher believes online dating might even tap into deeply-rooted biological mating instincts. "In many respects, [with online dating] we're going back to the way we used to be introduced. They're the kind of introductions we had millions of years ago. We traveled in small packs. You knew about people before you went out with them. The brain was not built to walk into a bar, where you know nobody, and start a conversation. That's not the way humanity has courted." The style of courtship provided by online dating, then, is very compatible with the complex ways in which the human brain is constructed and has evolved over thousands of years.

The brain, according to Fisher, has "evolved three core brain systems for mating and reproduction: lust, romantic attraction and attachment." Each of these systems is evolutionarily advantageous in different ways. A "soul mate," for instance, is a special person because he or she combines attraction and attachment, whereas many other people spark attraction, and maybe even love, but not the deep attachment required for a long-term partnership.

Through her research, Fisher also discovered that romantic love is a drive, not an emotion. Fisher experimented by putting 49 people in a brain scanner - 17 who had recently fallen in love, 15 who had recently been rejected, and 17 who were still in love after an average of 21 years of marriage. She and her research team found that activity in the area of the brain that makes dopamine and sends natural stimulants to the brain is responsible for creating the basic traits of romantic love, like the urge to spend time with someone and obsessive thinking about them. Romance comes from "ancient primitive centers linked with drive and linked with wanting," meaning that it has less in common with emotions and more in common with serious addiction!

It might sound like so much focus on biology and evolution will take away from the spontaneity of falling love, but Fisher isn't concerned about a conflict: "You can know every single ingredient in a piece of chocolate cake, but when you sit down to eat the cake, you can still enjoy it. The brain swamps it all and just goes with the powerful emotion of it." Her ultimate goal, she says, is just to " to enable people to kiss fewer frogs."

For more on the dating site Helen Fisher advices, you can check out our Chemistry.com review.

The first music video PlentyOfFish appeared in was for a song by Flo Rida back in 2009. In 2010 we saw PlentyOfFish appear in Telephone by Lada Gaga. Now in 2011, you can see Britney Spears surfing PlentyOfFish in her new video (starting at 1:28 min) for “Hold It Against Me”.



Other product placements in the Britney Spears video that I notice includes Make Up For Ever make-up and her new fragrance. Interesting enough Jonas Akerlund directed the videos for both Hold It Against Me and Telephone. It seems like more and more music stars now are using product placement to supplement their falling profits from music sales.

Product placement in pop music videos must be working for PlentyOfFish as they continue to try an attract the younger dating crowd. PlentyOfFish main competition in this demographic is Facebook and it's rise in popularity as a tool used by collage aged singles to meet new people and find dates.

For more information about this dating site you can check out our review of PlentyOfFish.

In May of 2010 ChristianCafe released their iPhone dating app. Well, this month the Christian dating service has released a version for Android phones. Those of you with Android base mobile phones can now enjoy dating on the go. The new app integrates directly with your account on ChristianCafe.com and for those new to this dating site have the option of signing up for a free trial right from your phone.

Features of this new dating app include performing basic and detail searches, viewing profiles and seeing who is online in your area. Photo uploads are a snap to do along with communicating with your matches via email and winks.

For more information about the app you can watch the video tour:



To find out more about this dating site, read our ChristianCafe.com review. To download the app visit the Android Market and search for 'christiancafe'.