Tips

We're entering holiday season, which in my opinion is the best time to meet people and increase your dating prospects. With all the parties, dinners, and networking events, you're missing out if you turn down invitations. Halloween especially is a great time to mix things up in your love life if it's grown a little stale with endless coffee dates. There's something to be said for scary movies and dark nights.

So, if you're thinking of doing something off the beaten path on your next date, try some of these Halloween ideas:

Local haunted houses and tours. The fun of Halloween is getting scared and clinging to someone next to you...a perfect date situation (if you're attracted to each other)! Check your local paper or events listings for any places in your area. In L.A. where I live, Hollywood tours are a favorite-lots of legends of stars and mobsters meeting grisly ends, their ghosts lurking around to make an appearance on Halloween. Take a date that interests you and show her your bravery (or lack thereof).

You met someone great, and now you've been dating a few weeks. You're excited and scared at the same time. Will it last? Will it be as exciting and wonderful as you imagine it to be? How do you ensure things will work out?

Unfortunately when it comes to love and life, there are no guarantees. But there are things you can do to help grow this relationship together with your significant other to make it a blissful experience. Take advantage of the excitement and euphoria you feel and put that energy into building the relationship. Here are some tips for you:

Tell him/ her how you feel. There's nothing like affirmation to keep a relationship on higher ground. Saying "I love you" is a huge part, but also encouraging your partner goes a long way. Let him know that you're proud of the work he's doing, or that she is the most exciting and interesting person to be around. Think about it. When someone you are dating tells you how wonderful he thinks you are, you can't help but notice and feel great.

Spend quality time together. Instead of going to dinner and perusing your smartphones for the latest text or tweet, or taking that work phone call, put your phone down. Pay attention to the person sitting across from you. Engage fully. After all, your love life is just as important as your career and friendships for long-term happiness. Show your new love that he/ she takes priority when you're together.

Share. There's nothing more exciting than a new relationship where you're learning about each other all the time. Don't be the person who wants to play your entire music collection for your partner and have her be as enthusiastic about it as you are - rather, share your tastes with each other. If your preferences differ, then you just have more to add to the relationship. You wouldn't want to date yourself anyway! Sharing is important and builds mutual respect and understanding.

Resist criticizing. It might be tempting to start listing your date's faults to try and get him to change. I mean - things are great but they could be amazing except for this one thing, right? This type of thinking is a mistake. Criticism only leads to resentment, so practice holding your tongue if you're prone to want to change your dates. You don't want to end up a nag. If you're truly incompatible and the differences start to appear more substantial, then you may want to reconsider the relationship.

Show affection. I'm not just talking about sex, although your physical relationship is an important part. The way you show your date how you feel through holding hands, touching his face, or rubbing her back all show your affection. When you aren't showing physical affection outside the bedroom, it can make your date feel isolated or rejected. Be aware of how you come across.

Online dating can be a frustrating process, but it can also be fun. There's no reason to look at online dating like you're looking for a job and interviewing candidates. Even if you claim to be "in a hurry" to meet someone, this approach is all wrong. Relationships with men take time to build. You can't just order up what you want and expect things to immediately fall into place.

Instead of going through your laundry list of personal must-haves and can't-haves when it comes to meeting Mr. Right in the interest of saving time, try putting the list aside. Approach dating with a lighter heart.

Following are some tips to cast a wider net:

Loosen those filters. If you have strict requirements for age, location, occupation, height, or any number of circumstantial characteristics, you are filtering out some great candidates from the start. Instead of narrowing the focus of your search from the start, cast a wider net by widening age range, location and other filters and see who shows up. Many women find the perfect man for them often is not their "type." So, keep your options open.

Answer emails and messages, even those you don't find initially attractive or desirable. I'm not saying you have to respond to every single message, but for the men who put effort into reading your profile and contacting you with a personal message, return the favor. Even if you aren't initially attracted to him, give each man a chance before you discount him. He could surprise you.

Say yes to a date with at least one man each month that you normally wouldn't because of his age, income, looks, etc. It's easier to cast a wider net when you don't have a specific goal in mind. Go out with someone who doesn't meet all your requirements. Then you can date with less pressure, and likely open yourself up to more possibility.

Tone down the negativity. I know it's tempting to point the finger at your last ten lousy dates and say, "see, I told you there aren't any good men online!" But this is missing the point. Did you do your best on those dates to keep an open mind, to listen and not judge? Did you give it a fair shot? Most men aren't going to be right for you, but that doesn't mean you can't try to have a good time in the process. Then likely you'll be better able to see when the right one does come along.

Online dating is not for the lazy. Anyone who's done it for a while knows what I'm talking about: it takes patience, persistence, and a lot of attention. (Not unlike many relationships!) But usually people become frustrated long before they give it a real chance, so they are left thinking online dating doesn't work. But it does. You just have to know how to do it.

There are many steps in the online dating process, but I feel the one that gets the least amount of attention is messaging. For some reason, this is where men seem to get stuck. They either don't get responses, or they don't get the responses they are looking for.

Instead of beating yourself up over not hearing back from the women you're attracted to, try following some of these tips and see what happens:

Message more women. If you find ten women attractive and send each of them a message with no reply, are you tempted to stop altogether? If so, this is a huge mistake! You have to think of online dating in terms of quantity: if you want certain results, you have to be willing to go the distance. Send fifty emails and see what happens. Send a hundred. You get the picture - don't just stop at a few. Put yourself out there more and I guarantee you'll see better results.

Compliment. Every woman likes to be noticed for her attributes. I don't mean sending an email entitled "Hey Sexy..." or commenting on her breasts. Be classy. Notice the details of her photo: her eyes, her smile, her hair - and compliment what you find attractive. You'll get her attention.

Mention something unique about her profile that shows her you read it. This is for all of you who send the same email to a hundred different women. Try personalizing them instead. A woman wants to know that you paid attention and think she's special. It goes a long way in getting her to respond.

Keep it brief. No need to write your life story. Many men feel the need to list off their accomplishments to prove themselves, instead of starting up a conversation. Women are looking to emotionally connect with a man. They don't connect with a resume or a monologue, so keep this in mind when you feel compelled to talk about all the details of your life in an email.

Keep the focus on her, not you. Again, no need to send a resume of your accomplishments. Women respond to men who pay attention to what they say, have a sense of humor, and like to pursue. If you do these things, you'll get some promising responses.

I'm a fan of social media, online dating, and mobile dating apps. I feel that anything that brings us together, enables us to meet new people, and helps us better communicate is a wonderful thing. However, it's important to remember that the online world and real world are two separate things. It's important to grow your real-life relationships by talking in person and spending time together, rather than always seeing what else is going on via your smartphone, Facebook, and Twitter. Face to face interaction is still key.

Following are some tips to manage and utilize technology so that it improves relationships, rather than diminishes them:

Keep your smartphone out of reach when on a date. Sure, it's tempting to check your text messages or post about your date on Twitter or Facebook, but it's also rude. Instead of leaving your phone on and checking it every few minutes, turn it off and put it away. It can be very distracting to both you and your date, and it sends the wrong message. The person sitting across from you deserves your attention. You made plans to be on a date, so be present.

Maximize your meeting potential. Join online dating sites, download mobile apps, and connect via social media. But don't forget real life! If someone catches your eye in line at the coffee shop or sitting next to you at a bar, start talking. It's important to engage with others in real life as well as online. The more people you meet, the better opportunity you have to network and find the right person for you.

Don't be a virtual stalker. If you've started dating someone new and friended her on Facebook, don't be tempted to constantly check on who she's friending, what she's posting on her wall, or how many of her friends are other guys. Facebook can be maddening when you use it to gage what the other person is thinking. So don't. Instead, have a conversation. Don't stalk or analyze Facebook behavior. By the same token, don't assume you can post about your relationship without asking and coming to an agreement. It's best to be clear with each other before you make your relationship known virtually.

Keep in touch. Texting makes it easier than ever to communicate with dates, but I don't think it should be the primary means of communication. If you've never met, pick up the phone and talk before the first date. If you want to communicate something important, call. If you're running late, then text and let the person know. If you want to let your date know you had a good time, send a thank you text. General rule: if you need to have a conversation, then pick up the phone and talk. If you just want to provide an update or confirm plans, texting is a great mechanism.

When it comes to online dating, we all try to make a good impression with our pictures and profiles. We want more matches to choose from, and we don't want to be p*censored*ed up in favor of someone younger, better looking or more successful. Unfortunately, we can get a little carried away with enhancing our attributes or giving out the wrong information just so we aren't filtered out of someone else's search. But does this really help - or does it hinder our search?

Following are some common areas where people are less than honest when it comes to online dating. If you do any of these, please reconsider. After all, if you and a date hit it off, the truth will come out sooner or later.You don't want to start off with a lie.

Stop posting old photos. People post photos that are old for a variety of reasons. Perhaps you've recently gained weight and you'd like to lose it before you post a current picture of yourself. Or you love that one picture from a trip you took ten years ago because it shows off your hair or smile. Or maybe you're great with Photoshop. Unfortunately, these tactics are misleading to people meeting you for the first time. I encourage you to have a friend help take some current pictures that show you in your best light. In addition to a headshot, also try an action shot of you doing something you love. Research has shown that this is far more effective than a glamour shot.

Be true to your age. Even if you feel shaving only two or three years off your age might help you get more matches, it may work against you. When I did this, I tended to get responses from people who weren't interested in long-term relationships. I learned that opening my own mind and dating people outside my age range comfort zone worked more in my favor.

Height matters. I noticed that many men I dated added about 2 inches on average to their height. While this seems like no big deal, it was something that stood out to me because it was so common. Instead of taking a match's word for it, I subtracted a few inches from the height listed every time I went on a date. And what about the men who were telling the truth?

Don't adjust your body type. If you are a fuller figure woman or flat as a board, then don't hide it. No man wants to be misled, and tastes vary. Men prefer women of all different shapes, so don't think your weight or body type will exclude you from searches. It's worse to lie about your body type and then meet a man in person who was expecting you to look different.

Income does not equal success. Many people lie about their income to look more attractive and successful. Honestly, it's less about the amount of money you make than how p*censored*ionate and ambitious you are when it comes to pursuing your dreams. That is what people find attractive. If you're not comfortable disclosing your income, then leave it off.

Above all, it's not your date's fault if they aren't interested in you after learning you lied to them about age, income, body type, etc. Remember, it doesn't widen your search to be less than honest, it makes your search productive: they will be interested in the real you.