Photos

Let's get this out of the way right now: it's what's inside that counts. I know that. You know that.

But we also know that no one's going to get to the inside if they don't like the outside first. It's not pessimistic or cynical, it's just honest.

Your picture is one of the first things people see when visiting your profile. And if you use a service like Tinder, it's practically the only thing they see. It's hard to overstate the importance of a photo under those circumstances, isn't it?

The good news is, there are plenty of ways to catch someone's eye, and they don't have to be complicated or expensive. Here are a few things to consider:

• Your profile picture should just be you. You may love a picture of you and your bestie, but you don't want visitors to waste time wondering which one you are. They'll swipe left simply out of frustration. Once you're past the main profile picture, feel free to include photos with friends. They show off your social side and prove you aren't a narcissist who only snaps selfies.
• Include a variety of photos. A collection of headshots – each one exactly the same except for a slightly different angle – says nothing about who you are. (Or maybe it does, and it says “boring.”) Mix things up a bit. Have one picture with a pet, another engaged in a hobby, and a third showing off your silly side. Visitors get not only a better idea of what you look like, but also a better sense of your personality and lifestyle.
• Show off your face and your body. I know. It's scary. It feels vulnerable and you're worried someone will criticize you, or move on without taking even a second to read your profile. But think about it logically. You can't lie or hide when you meet someone in person, so you might as well be totally honest up front. You'll waste less of your own time and everyone else's.
• Stay current. Some people intentionally put up photos that are outdated. Others simply forget that they haven't refreshed theirs in a while. The same rules as above apply. Lying by omission is not a good way to start a relationship. And who knows? A feature you don't like may be incredibly attractive to someone else. At the end of the day, almost nothing is sexier than confidence.

In the competitive world of online dating, making a memorable first impression – and making it the right one – is critical. Choosing the right photos gives you a powerful leg up.

A recent article in Marie Claire surveyed single men across the U.S. to ask them about the online dating profiles they come across, and what they felt women lied about most when writing their online dating profiles.

The number one thing guys think women lie about is their looks – whether it’s their weight, “athleticism,” height, or even whether or not they've posted an old picture from five years ago. Enough women have used tricks to make themselves look more “attractive” – from using old photos to Photoshopping their features to avoiding posting full-body pictures – so that men are automatically suspicious of how they portray themselves physically, and what they might be hiding. So ladies, no more cover-ups. Include recent photos, and a body shot as well as headshots. Since there are also studies on the wide range of taste men have, you should show off your “flaws” - likely, it means more dates.

Men also believe women lie about their age. Let’s face it – I think this happens for both genders, especially for men who want to date much younger women. There is an age bias in online dating, which contributes to this phenomenon, but perhaps we should all do a reality check. Do you really want to admit you lied about something so fundamental when you meet in person, especially if you really like the guy? It pays to come clean from the start, so trust won’t be an issue.

Men are also weary of women who post that they love their independence – and include lots of photos with their girlfriends as proof. If you describe yourself as "not clingy," the first thing a man will wonder is – how clingy will she be? Instead of saying this in your profile, talk about the trips you’ve taken or the things you like to do. There’s no need to prove your independence if you have it.

Perhaps thanks to the movie/ book “Gone Girl,” men also get suspicious of any woman who describes herself as “laid-back.” They immediately wonder if she’s very sensitive or highly reactive. Same thing with women who describe themselves as successful – if they have to say it, are they really? (Plus, men tend to lie about their own success.) Again, it’s best to avoid defending yourself to someone who has never met you.

The last and most important thing to note is that men don’t believe it when women say they want a “casual” relationship. When they take this statement at face value, often times, the women end up wanting more, so they avoid women who write this altogether. The important thing to remember is – be honest. If you want a relationship, you shouldn’t be afraid to admit it. In fact, it will help you weed out the ones who don’t – because you won’t succeed in changing them.

Before you start looking for the perfect lighting situation for your online dating photo shoot, or try a lot of make-up before you snap the picture, you might want to reconsider. A new study found that while your photo may appear more attractive when it’s “enhanced,” if you’re a woman, you likely won’t be trusted.

Researchers at the University of Connecticut conducted an experiment to determine how people judged each other based on their online dating profile photos. They asked 153 straight men and 152 straight women, ages 17 to 36, to look at one of four pictures – each looked at both enhanced and unenhanced pictures of the same person.

Both men and women thought the enhanced photos made the dater considerably more attractive. But men tended to assume that the enhanced female photos were hiding something, and that they couldn’t be trusted. The women on the other hand felt the guys who were enhanced were more likeable and trustworthy – creating a “halo effect” if you will.

While the new study looked at online dating specifically, it seems to corroborate what happens in the real world when people are checking each other out in person.

According to Today.com, the new research provides more evidence of how makeup can change people's perceptions of a woman's character. Alex Jones, a postdoctoral research associate at Gettysburg College who was not involved in the study, told the morning show website: "Attractive people are not always seen in a positive light. Attractive women seem particularly vulnerable to these judgments and cosmetics use is one area where harsher judgments are given to women."

Interestingly, the study also pointed to a lack of concern among men: “males found the beautified profile as more attractive and had a higher desire to date the person in the picture despite the lower degree of trustworthiness they reported," the authors noted. So even though the men didn’t trust the women who enhanced their photos, they did have a desire to date them anyway.

On the flip side, women seemed to trust men more when they had enhanced their photos, assuming that personality traits would match their looks.

Why did women find the guys with beautiful photos more appealing and trustworthy? It seems that this mirrors real life – women tend to fantasize about what they desire, assuming that a man who presents well is also going to be great boyfriend material. Unfortunately, in real life, you can’t know if someone is trustworthy until you get to know them – therefore, it’s fantasy to assume someone might be great based on an enhanced photo.

The researchers will present their findings at the conference of the International Communication Association in San Juan, Puerto Rico from May 21-25.

Now that Tinder has announced the integration of Instagram into its dating app, daters might become more self-conscious about posting selfies or an abundance of food photos. After all, if someone’s interested in your profile and wants to look further, it gives him/her more reason to judge you and move on.

That can be pretty stressful to your low-key dating style on Tinder. But if you are watching what you post – and want to put your best face forward, so to speak – then you might want to consider these tips about the kind of photos to avoid posting.

No drunk shots. It might seem festive to include a picture of you downing that margarita for Cinco de Mayo, but it might make your dates wonder if you party too much. Avoid polarizing potential dates based on a few weekend nights out having fun – find activities that represent who you are in your normal, every day life.

Keep group photos out. If you post a group photo, not only will potential dates wonder which one you are, but they are more likely to want to date your friends. Don’t fall into this trap – everyone has friends, so there’s no reason to promote it, and if you want to show off how attractive yours are, it will backfire.

Ease up on duck faces. The rise of the selfie has also resulted in the popularity of making duck faces at the camera. While you might rock your pout, don’t advertise it on Tinder. People don’t want to see your Kylie Jenner impression, they want to know who you are and what you really look like. Also, try smiling instead.

No posing with celebrities or ultra nice objects, like sports cars. I know you’re proud of that photo you took with George Clooney, or that you just bought a new car. Please don’t pose next to them for your Tinder photos. This is really screaming to potential dates: “I’m desperate for attention.”

Include a body shot. If you have nothing but shots of your face, people will make assumptions about what you’re not posting – your body. They might assume you’re hiding something, or you’ve lied about your weight or appearance in some way. Don’t let this happen. Be straightforward, and try to have a little fun with it.

Avoid all those photos of your pet and/or your food. You've heard this before, but please avoid posting all those pics of your adorable dog or cat making faces, sleeping, cuddling, whatever. Show these to your friends, not your potential dates. The same goes for food, no matter how artfully you’ve captured that plate of sushi. Endless pictures of food doesn’t tell your date anything about who you are, what you like, or how you spend time – except that you like to eat pretty things. The focus of your profile should be you.

For more about this dating app you can take a look at our Tinder review.

Tired of meeting flaky people over dating apps like Tinder? Turns out, there’s a reason for all the disappearing acts: a recent study by GlobalWebIndex reported that up to 42% of the population on Tinder are already in relationships. And incredibly, 3 in 10 users are married. Before you start bashing men, the report also broke down information by gender, and it turns out that married and taken women on Tinder outnumber the men on the app who are already in relationships.

In response to this, and perhaps to further differentiate themselves from the popular dating app, Hinge has announced that in the latest release of its dating app, it will publish whether or not you’re in a relationship, engaged or married.

Hinge did its own study among its users, and found that 1.6 percent of them were either married or engaged, while an additional two percent were already in relationships. While Hinge wins hands-down over the high percentage of cheaters on Tinder, it still wants to do better. So in Hinge version 3.5, users who reveal they are “married,” “engaged” or “in a relationship” on Facebook will have that information pulled and shared on their Hinge profile, in an effort to shame cheaters everywhere. And if you remove your relationship status from Facebook to avoid this problem? Then you may have to explain it to your spouse or partner.

Hinge utilizes Facebook to match people who are in the same circles – Facebook friends of friends who are also using the service – so you’ve never really meeting a total stranger. At least, you will have a Facebook friend in common, which helps daters reduce the anxiety about online dating.

The new version adds another great benefit, which is more transparency in dating. Instead of finding yourself devastated to find out several dates later that your match is otherwise involved, it’s out in the open.

This might be a problem for female daters, according to the GlobalWebIndex study, since the majority of cheaters on Tinder happen to be women – the target market and primary user base for Hinge. Hinge appeals to women because of safety issues, especially those who are nervous to try a dating app, because users are matched within their own social networking circles. But if married women take to the app (and perhaps they won’t – and don’t – because they would be called out by their mutual Facebook friends), they have to go to greater lengths to hide their movements.

Regardless, it is a positive step for online dating in general to create more transparency for those who are truly looking to date other single people.

You've agonized over every single detail in your profile. You've wondered if you should add an inch to your height or shave a year off your age. You've wondered if your tagline is witty enough. You've worried that saying you're looking for a relationship makes you look desperate.

In all that agonizing, you probably never worried about this: your profile picture may be too hot.

Yep, just when you thought you'd worried about everything you could possibly worry about, researchers have come up with yet another thing to stress out about. Ain't science grand?

A team from the University of Connecticut conducted an experiment to determine how people construct judgments using online dating profile pictures. They showed 305 volunteers between the ages of 17 and 36 a photo of a man or a woman. Some of the photos were casual – average lighting, no special makeup or hair treatment. The other photos were enhanced with makeup, hair styling, and strategic lighting.

Participants were then asked a series of questions to determine the profiles' physical attractiveness, similarity (to the participant), trustworthiness, and their desire to date the person featured.

The researchers found that men considered the beautified pictures more attractive, but also considered them less trustworthy than the non-beautified pictures of the exact same woman. Women, on the other hand, found the beautified male profile picture both more attractive and more trustworthy than the non-beautified picture of the same man.

Study co-author, Rory McGloin, explained the findings in a news release: “This finding suggests that even when men suspect that a woman may not look exactly like she does in her profile picture, they are willing to take the risk and pursue a date with her. In our sample, attraction seems to be more important than trust.”

McGloin also suggested that the mistrust of enhanced photos could come from the increasing spread of the catfishing phenomenon. "This finding provides an empirical highlight to the concept of catfishing and the larger phenomena surrounding online dating,” he said, “in which it is both normal and acceptable for individuals' to mislead or deceive their potential suitors."

The study – colorfully called "Too Hot to Trust: Examining the Relationship Between Attractiveness, Trustworthiness, and Desire to Date in Online Dating" – will be presented at the 65th Annual International Communication Association Conference in San Juan, Puerto Rico, 21-25 May 2015.

Can a profile picture really be “too hot to trust?” And if so, what does that mean for apps like Tinder that rely so heavily on photos?