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I was wondering if anyone has an experience of the whole "let's just be friends" thing actually working out. I am still civilized to most of my ex's and on the surface we get along great, but we are by no means really friends anymore. I just went through a break up of an 8 month relationship and still love him, but he was my best friend before the relationship too and I am afraid to lose that if I just cut him off in order to get over him. I don't just want this to end up like the rest where we get along on the surface but not underneath.

I find that if I was friends with the person before we started dating I can remain friends afterwards, just as long as the breakup wasn't to bad. If we were not friends before I find we end up drifting away from each other.

I married my ex-husband twice. And divorced him twice. We just can't live together, but we throughly enjoy each others company. He is my best friend and I his. It's been four years and we still speak everyday. So, yes it is possible to remain friends after a break-up!

I can even take that concept another step.
My current has remained good friends with his ex,for the same reason others have stated: they were very good friends before and during their long relationship! When I relocated here to continue my relationship with my partner (now 7 years), his ex has become one of my best friends! ANd I could not have imagined such a gift.
As for my own ex's, we (2 of them) have also remained friends. Life is too short to harbor negative energy..each man was a learning experience,creating the man i am today and the relationship i know cherish!