"Why did eHarmony reject me?"

Advice
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You've seen all the commercials, you've heard all the success stories, and you're a single person desperately seeking that special someone. So you say, "I'll join eHarmony!" You log in, go through the whole personality test and anxiously click the final button to get your results...

"Unable to match you at this time"

WHAT? eHarmony, the site of love and happiness, has decided that you're not matchable for love and happiness? What gives? What did you do wrong? How can you be such a horrible person that you've been rejected from a dating site?

Well, hold your horses for just a bit while I explain it to you.

First off, if eHarmony rejects you, BE HAPPY. They're essentially saying "Don't waste your money on us." Move on to a different dating site and then you can laugh when you're writing your Chemistry.com success story later down the road.

But for those who are curious, here are the main reasons why eHarmony will reject you:

1) You're gay. eHarmony doesn't match people who aren't straight. If you're looking for the same exact personality test on a site that's just for gay people, check out CompatiblePartners.net.

2) You're separated or married. eHarmony doesn't play that game. Even if you're just waiting to sign the papers, eHarmony still considers you married.

3) You're too young. 18 or 19? You're "not old enough" to be marriage-minded.

4) You've tried marriage too many times. If you've had multiple divorces, eHarmony doesn't think you're a good match for its members.

5) You flunked the personality test. If eHarmony considers you to be too angry, sad, untrustworthy, or dishonest, you'll be rejected. This will also happen if your test answers contradict each other. Also semi-unfair? If you admit to having a bad childhood (even if you've worked through it in therapy!) you'll probably be rejected, too.

My advice?

If you get accepted to eHarmony, great. If not, no biggie. There are plenty of other great sites out there like Chemistry.com and RewardingLove.com that have extensive personality tests. And honestly? When I was an eHarmony member, most of my matches were guys I'd already seen via Match.com. Being rejected from one dating site isn't the end of the world; it's simply one opportunity lost - and not necessarily the best one for you!

For further information on this dating site and how it works, read our review of eHarmony.