Making the Most of Custom Search
- Friday, September 07 2012 @ 11:06 am
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 839
Sometimes you’ll hear (even from me!) conflicting messages about searching for common interests. On the one hand, a custom search in an online dating site is an incredibly valuable tool, and even one of the main draws to online dating. On the other hand, you want to think outside your own box, you want to broaden your search, you don’t want to get hung up on whether you both love the same TV shows. So which is it?
In a word, both! Custom searches can be valuable in a few different ways. The scenario you probably think of first is something like this: you think you’re the only person in your city who loves to watch international soccer. You sit down at your computer and do a search for international soccer, or maybe your favorite team. Bingo! Six potential matches in your area also love the sport! Who knew? Even if you don’t wind up having chemistry, you may have just found someone with whom to throw a World Cup party.
The thing is, that doesn’t always happen. Maybe you type in your favorite team and there are no matches. You still want to try to find the same “type” of person, though. Here’s where custom searches can still be valuable, but you need to think outside the box a bit. For example, maybe your specific favorite team is just too obscure; try searching for other teams (a little friendly rivalry never hurt anyone). Maybe international soccer isn’t getting any hits, so what about teams within your own country? Or maybe just someone who is a fan of all sports in general.
It might not be an exact match in interests, but you’re still finding people who are passionate about similar things in the same sphere. Even if they don’t share your specific passion, they still might understand and respect yours.
That’s why it’s important not to get hung up about whether they happen to like your favorite TV show. You don’t need to share every single opinion, but it is imperative that you respect the interests of one another. And of course, being able to share other things is important too - which is why finding the “type” of person who shares your interests can be more important than finding one who matches up exactly.
Thus, as you begin your searches, don’t seek to find a clone of yourself. Think about the sort of person you’d be attracted to, what you’d like to share, and what related interests they might have. Experiment with topics broad and specific, and don’t be afraid to play around with it; you never know who you might discover!
In a word, both! Custom searches can be valuable in a few different ways. The scenario you probably think of first is something like this: you think you’re the only person in your city who loves to watch international soccer. You sit down at your computer and do a search for international soccer, or maybe your favorite team. Bingo! Six potential matches in your area also love the sport! Who knew? Even if you don’t wind up having chemistry, you may have just found someone with whom to throw a World Cup party.
The thing is, that doesn’t always happen. Maybe you type in your favorite team and there are no matches. You still want to try to find the same “type” of person, though. Here’s where custom searches can still be valuable, but you need to think outside the box a bit. For example, maybe your specific favorite team is just too obscure; try searching for other teams (a little friendly rivalry never hurt anyone). Maybe international soccer isn’t getting any hits, so what about teams within your own country? Or maybe just someone who is a fan of all sports in general.
It might not be an exact match in interests, but you’re still finding people who are passionate about similar things in the same sphere. Even if they don’t share your specific passion, they still might understand and respect yours.
That’s why it’s important not to get hung up about whether they happen to like your favorite TV show. You don’t need to share every single opinion, but it is imperative that you respect the interests of one another. And of course, being able to share other things is important too - which is why finding the “type” of person who shares your interests can be more important than finding one who matches up exactly.
Thus, as you begin your searches, don’t seek to find a clone of yourself. Think about the sort of person you’d be attracted to, what you’d like to share, and what related interests they might have. Experiment with topics broad and specific, and don’t be afraid to play around with it; you never know who you might discover!
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