Knowledge From Wisdom

- Tuesday, July 26 2011 @ 04:10 pm
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 1,408
In elementary school, students are often sent to “interview” older family members, neighbors, and acquaintances. They might be asking them what life was like during a certain point in history, or how they became successful in their careers. However, it never seems to occur to anyone to talk about how and why their marriage has lasted decades, or how to make a long-distance relationship successful.
Yes, it’s important to remember that every relationship is unique, comprised of at least two unique individuals. Still, there’s nothing wrong with having a wide array of tips and tricks to choose from. The problem is that we tend to regard relationships as almost unknowable - and think that those who have made them work must be privy to some knowledge, handed down in a secret ceremony by the light of the full moon. In reality, it’s possible they’ve simply never been asked.
So next time you’re visiting family or friends, put on your journalist hat and look around. Who’s in an apparently successful long-term relationship? Who would you like to emulate? Instead of thinking of love as some mysterious, uncrackable code, interview the masters of the trade and ask them to share. The worst they can do is say no.
Now, remember - occasionally appearances can be deceiving. There’s always the couple that looks perfect but isn’t. Sometimes elderly couples might operate on philosophies that you find outdated or non-applicable. That’s okay - mentally file it away. Who knows what insight it might give you at another time?
What you’re striving to do is not literally copy an established couple, but gain as much general knowledge as you can about relationships and the various ways to handle them. Then, in your own relationships, you can use what works, discard what doesn’t, and make up a few rules of your own as you go along. This is what you would do if you were raising a child, starting a new job, or moving to a new place - why not apply it to love as well?
Yes, it’s important to remember that every relationship is unique, comprised of at least two unique individuals. Still, there’s nothing wrong with having a wide array of tips and tricks to choose from. The problem is that we tend to regard relationships as almost unknowable - and think that those who have made them work must be privy to some knowledge, handed down in a secret ceremony by the light of the full moon. In reality, it’s possible they’ve simply never been asked.
So next time you’re visiting family or friends, put on your journalist hat and look around. Who’s in an apparently successful long-term relationship? Who would you like to emulate? Instead of thinking of love as some mysterious, uncrackable code, interview the masters of the trade and ask them to share. The worst they can do is say no.
Now, remember - occasionally appearances can be deceiving. There’s always the couple that looks perfect but isn’t. Sometimes elderly couples might operate on philosophies that you find outdated or non-applicable. That’s okay - mentally file it away. Who knows what insight it might give you at another time?
What you’re striving to do is not literally copy an established couple, but gain as much general knowledge as you can about relationships and the various ways to handle them. Then, in your own relationships, you can use what works, discard what doesn’t, and make up a few rules of your own as you go along. This is what you would do if you were raising a child, starting a new job, or moving to a new place - why not apply it to love as well?