Matching

If Tinder has been a sea of left swipes lately, the app's recently announced update could change your luck for the holidays. Tinder’s founder Sean Rad announced forthcoming changes to the algorithm during Ireland’s Web Summit on November 4.

The update is set to be Tinder's biggest yet. "It's been our mission since day one to uncover ... every possible meaningful relationship," Rad told Mashable. In service of that goal, Rad says the company is looking to "reduce the barriers to people connecting" and help them form "deeper connections." He claims the upcoming changes will boost connections made on the dating app by 30%.

Unfortunately, actual details about the algorithm update are scarce. Tinder has not yet made a formal announcement and is keeping mostly mum until then. Rad only said to expect a "series of things you're going to see that will help you make more sense of the sheer volume of people around you and build deeper connections...and more ways to connect."

What Tinder is talking about is its reputation as a “hookup app,” which its eager to shed. Rad made yet another attempt to distance the company from that status, adding that 80% of users are looking for long-term relationships.

This year has seen Tinder release features designed to make the app more engaging. Not long ago it launched 'Super Like' - a function that can only be used once a day to let a user know you really (like, really really) like them. Rad compares it to walking over and saying hi to someone, instead of winking at them from across the room.

The CEO also shared some of Tinder's impressive numbers with the Web Summit. The app currently receives 1.6 billion swipes per day, 26 million matches per day and 9 billion total matches since its debut in 2012. As a result of those swipes, 1.5 million in-person dates stem from Tinder each week. More than half of those make it to a second date.

Up next, Tinder will focus on monetization. Most of the company's revenue currently comes from Tinder Plus, a paid service that allows users to search outside of their geographical location and undo swipes. Advertising hasn't yet hit the app in a major way, but there will be a bigger focus on ads in the near future.

Rad is nothing if not confident about Tinder's success. "There is no doubt that Tinder is increasing the number of connections in this world," he said. "We are bringing the world closer together at a scale that no platform has ever been able to do and in that sense, we are changing the world."

For more on this popular dating app, please read our Tinder review.

Let’s face it – our information is out there digitally for all the world to see, or at least those who are interested in Googling our names. But we like to know what kind of privacy controls are still in place for our social media accounts. We don’t want Facebook sharing our posts with just anyone, and perhaps you keep your Instagram account private, too.

But what happens when Facebook starts to encroach on what you like to keep separate? For example, Facebook has a “suggested friends” page where it connects you with people in your social circles – maybe someone you knew back in high school or through a previous employer, and you would like to friend him/her. But what happens when the suggested friend is someone you don’t care to see again – say a Tinder date gone wrong?

Apparently, this is happening more and more, but strangely, no one really knows why. News website Motherboard investigated the link between Facebook and dating apps like Tinder and OkCupid, to see where the connection lies and if they are sharing information unbeknownst to their users.

According to Motherboard, Tinder, OkCupid and Facebook all deny sharing information with each other. Plus, most of these unwanted contacts that are suggested to Facebook users share no Facebook friends nor do they have a shared workplace history or any other connection besides being a potential or previous date.

So exactly how are these apps and Facebook tracking movement (and connections) we don’t necessarily want them to see? Shouldn’t your online dating life be kept separate from your social media circles until you meet someone special and YOU want to include them in your circles? Probably the last person you want to see as a Facebook friend suggestion is your one-night stand from two weeks ago or the date who stood you up.

So why does this keep happening? The answers are unclear. As the companies deny sharing information, there are other ways that your connections can leave a digital trail that makes its way to Facebook.

One such way is through your phone. If you message one of your dates, even if you don’t save the contact information, depending on your Facebook settings the service is able to pull contacts you have messaged and called on your phone to help expand your social circles. Motherboard found one such notice from Facebook while testing this out. The article says: “Facebook does say it bases its suggestions in part on ‘imported contacts,’ but this is something users have to opt into on the mobile app or desktop... I don’t ever remember agreeing to import my contacts, and yet when I checked my “invite history” page I had 900+ contacts saved, apparently were continuously syncing and updating, that I promptly removed. Facebook warned this could make my friend suggestions ‘less relevant.’”

Another reason could lie in Facebook searches. Chances are before a date you want to look up some information about a person over social media, doing due diligence to get to know the person you were about to meet. Perhaps you searched for them on Facebook, which would mean they could show up as a suggested friend – after all, Facebook knows you looked for them, not that you were interested in dating them.

At any rate, these digital connections will continue to increase, so it’s important to be prepared to see people you may not want in your suggested circles. If nothing else, just delete.

When you swipe right on someone’s profile, you have a good idea of your physical preferences and what kind of person you are attracted to. Maybe you like a certain body type or hair color or height, but after that, it gets a little more complex. Maybe you like a particular person’s smile, or that they seem to have a wicked sense of humor or arty style in their photography.

While swiping is making it easier to go through profiles and accept or reject someone at whim, is it becoming more automatic the longer we swipe? Are we careful in our choices, or do we casually and without much thought say yes or no? Do we want someone (or something) else to do the swiping for us, someone who knows our preferences as well or even better than we do? It would save time and effort, but do we want to disengage from matching entirely?

At least one researcher is asking the question. He thinks we can be consistent enough in our picks that a computer can pick up on what we like and do the swiping for us. And why shouldn't this be an option?

Harm de Vries, a post-doctoral researcher at the Université de Montreal, thinks computers would make excellent choices on our behalf, and set about proving it with a recent study.

According to an article in PC World, De Vries scraped 10,000 photos from Tinder and gave a computer his opinion of 8,000 of them. Then he let the computer determine his likes and dislikes for the remaining 2,000, thinking this sample was reflective and large enough to be pretty accurate. Unfortunately, it managed to be right only 55% of the time. In other words, it wasn’t much better than closing your eyes and swiping arbitrarily.

De Vries decided to test a larger sample, so he pulled almost 500,000 photos from OkCupid. With a greater number of images to work with, the computer achieved a higher success rate – 68% - but still managed to correctly agree with only two out of every three choices made by DeVries.

Still, De Vries is hopeful that computers can assist in the decision-making process. He thinks even services like Twitter can benefit from computer learning, which is still pretty accurate even compared to human learning. "One of my friends who collaborated with me got to learn my preferences and he managed 76 percent accuracy, so even for humans it's pretty hard."

Choosing who we are attracted to is not an exact  science – we are all attracted to people that don’t necessarily have our “favored” characteristics, like dark hair or an athletic body, but they can still possess something that we find very compelling.

The point is – do we want to control our choices, or have a computer just do it for us?

Dating app Hinge is taking after OkCupid by collecting its user data and publishing results that might help people better connect. The latest report outlines the best pick-up lines among users of its app – and as it turns out, the way to a woman’s heart might just be through her stomach.

To conduct the survey, Hinge recruited copywriters and data analysts to compose 100 original openers, and sent them to 22 percent of Hinge users, who were then given the option of sending these openers to their matches. After studying eight million impressions, trends began to emerge. Some were expected - daters who want to connect should definitely avoid generic statements like 'Hey, what's up?' as an opening line, for example. The data was refined and categorized to give more in-depth info about who was responding—including their gender, age, and location across the U.S.

Results of the month-long experiment showed the most effective conversation starters for women include food references. For instance, a guy could ask a question like: “Chocolate, red velvet, or funfetti?” referring to cupcake preferences, or “Best discovery: Netflix or avocados?” for example. Hinge noted that “women are 40% more likely than men to respond to openers that are food-related.”

Men were most responsive when asked out directly, and particularly if those messages were assertive (the types of messages most women don’t like, which should be noted). For instance, if a woman put herself out there and confidently asked “Drinks soon?” or “Free this week?” men were 98% more likely to respond favorably.

Males were also found to have shorter attention spans: If they don’t receive a response to a message within six hours, a quarter of them will drop out of sight, compared with only five per cent of women.

As far as age groups, the 35 and older crowd prefers pop culture references. For instance, they responded best to “Katy Perry or Taylor Swift?” or “Bears, beets, or Battlestar Gallactica?” The 20-somethings preferred introductions about lifestyle with lines like: “Better adventure: Rock climbing or scuba diving?” or “Sunday priorities: Exercise, sleep or aggressive mimosas?” The 18-23 age group seemed to prefer novelty questions like: “Pain reliever personality: Advil, Tylenol or complaining?” and “You’re having your portrait painted – what’s your backdrop?”

Regional responses varied too, with folks in Los Angeles preferring entertainment-related questions (no surprise), and users in the Mid-West liking the 90’s references.

Hinge connects people through Facebook circles, and is available for both Android and iPhone. For more on Hinge, you can read our review.

This could be the best news you'll hear all day. Maybe even all year. A proposed Tinder-style app promises to take 'Netflix and chill' to a whole new level.

There's no one who isn't obsessed with Netflix (except perhaps the jealous haters who don't have it), so it seems only natural that someone would find away to turn your love of Netflix into actual love. With a human.

The new service is, appropriately, called Netfling. Unlike other dating services that match you with people based on shared interests, Netfling matches based on similar taste in Netflix viewing. It starts by logging in with your Netflix info. The app then gathers data from your Netflix account to determine your most-watched shows and movies. After that, you're presented with possible matches and swipe, Tinder-style, to indicate your interest.

Netfling calls itself a way to “find your perfect couch companion” and says that “the secret to a happy relationship isn't communication. It's having the same Netflix taste.” It's, well... it's a bold, and ridiculous, statement, but you can't blame them for trying. Go big or go home. And ridiculous or not, there are bound to be binge-watchers who love the idea.

The truth is, sharing your favorite flicks with a partner or date creates an intimate bond. There's something special about cuddling up on the couch together, and a person's taste in entertainment can tell you a lot about their sense of humor, intelligence, interests and maturity.

This could be big business. Netflix has more than 65 million users as of last count, 42 million in the US alone. Tinder has significantly fewer, at an estimated 50 million (the company hasn't released official figures). If all those single Netflix users could turn their obsessions with Breaking Bad and Friends into matchmaking opportunities, there might be far fewer lonely nights spent in front of laptops.

Of course, the Netflix dating scheme doesn't come without problems. Pretty much everyone was in love with Breaking Bad at one point, so it's hardly a point of differentiation between possible suitors. A more in-depth profile will be needed if you're to decide who is actually a compatible match for you.

There's also the fact that, in the grand scheme of things, liking the same TV shows is hardly a predictor of long-term relationship success. Sure it's nice to watch The Wire together, but is it really a big deal if you don't share favorite TV shows?

We're getting ahead of ourselves. For now, Netfling is only a proposed app. It's waiting on the release of a Netflix API before it can be made. But hey – we can still dream of an efficient way to find an intriguing stranger to share popcorn with.

Online dating is a wonderful thing, but it is a double-edged sword in many respects. We can meet a lot more people this way, but having the ability to meet more people also means we have to suffer through a lot more bad dates. A LOT more.

Let me clarify – this isn’t a bad thing. It’s just the thing that people tend to complain about when it comes to online dating. “There are so many bad ones out there,” is the cry from most. But even if you only had one date a month, chances are you wouldn’t click with most of those dates either. The irony is, most people aren’t romantically suited for each other – a part of online dating that we must come to accept.

The point I’m making is this: you’ll have a lot of first dates. And by comparison, relatively few second dates.

This isn’t to say you are failing at online dating, or that there just aren’t many “good ones” out there. It just means that you (and other online daters) are meeting a lot of people at any given time, and most of them aren’t going to click with you. In fact, most won’t lead to a second date. And that’s okay.

Second dates mean that there is some chemistry felt on both sides, that there might be an opportunity to move forward into a relationship. If one person didn’t feel a connection on the first date, she probably isn’t willing to try again for date number two (although I believe we should error on the side of giving more people an opportunity for a second date, where they will likely be more “themselves” than on a first date). Chemistry is an elusive concept. It is something that is felt – and not always by both people.

If you aren’t getting many second dates and want a bit more success, there are a few things to consider changing. Number one – are you mixing up your meeting place? After a dozen coffee dates at your favorite coffee joint, things can get a little stale. Try branching out and doing something more creative, not necessarily more expensive. Go for a walk in the park or a hike. Try a wine tasting event or strolling a flea market. Try a more inspiring date and it might mean that you have more fun together in general.

If you are expecting instant chemistry or love at first sight with your dates, you’ll be waiting a long time. Most people don’t feel chemistry with someone until they have built up trust. If they do feel chemistry right away, it typically fizzles pretty quickly because you don’t really know each other. Don’t rely solely on your animal instincts. Instead, take things slowly, get to know the person sitting across from you, and don’t take it personally if there is no second date.

When it’s right, there will be many more dates after the second.