General News

Have you ever been on a first date with someone you didn’t know – who you’d never seen before? Even in an online dating photo?

If you said no, you’re in good company. According to a recent survey by Dating Advice, over half of Americans – 57% - have never been on a blind date. As it turns out, there is no real gender difference among respondents either – 58% of women have never been on a blind date compared to 56% of men.

Interestingly, singles who have never been married were also among the most likely to have never been on a blind date – about 70% total. Compared to their married counterparts at 50% and divorced respondents at 48%, they don’t appear to be so open to the idea.

Also, 80% of young people ages 18-24 have never been on a blind date compared to senior respondents. Among those 64 and older, only 42% had never been on a blind date.

There is a bit of a gap when it comes to sexual preference. Fifty-six percent of straight people surveyed have never been on a blind date compared to only 49% of gay respondents. And Latinos were the least likely ethnic group to have been on a blind date, with 70% admitting they hadn’t.

What does all this mean? Are blind dates considered a thing of the past, or is there a reason singles aren’t really interested in them anymore?

Blind dates might seem like an old-fashioned idea with all the dating apps and websites that people have to choose from. But they also require us to be on our best behavior – after all, word could get back to your friend or family member who set you up if you’re disrespectful or you neglect to call. It adds a level of safety and accountability to a date that online and mobile dating don’t provide.

Then again, if you’re not attracted to your blind date, it might be a little harder to explain to your friends or Aunt Mary just why you don’t want a second date.

So should we be more open to the idea of a blind date? In the same way that we have adapted to a dating culture that uses mobile apps and websites to find love, this is yet another avenue. And while it might take more time to set up and promises little return unless you hit it off, it’s worth a try.

When it comes to dating, if you’re not exploring your options, you might be wasting some good opportunities.

We’ve been warned of scandals when it comes to online dating. Some people post fake profiles and create stories of financial hardship to extract money or financial information from other users, hoping to cash in on someone’s vulnerability or desire for love. This can compromise our security, but it’s within our control to not respond or to report the abuse. But what about the information we voluntarily offer without even knowing how it will be used?

Mobile dating and location-based apps operate and match you with others according to where you physically are, which means they need to collect data from you, usually through your phone’s GPS. But then what happens to the information? Is it used only for matching purposes to benefit the users of the site, or are companies using this valuable information in other ways?

New legislation aims to protect users from themselves and the online dating sites who collect location and other personal information. Senator Al Franken is leading the charge, advocating for more privacy for users.

"This stuff is advancing at a faster and faster rate, and we've got to try and catch up," Franken tells USA Today. "This is about Americans' right to privacy and one of the most private things is your location."

Considering how many people have used online dating sites – a recent Pew report indicated 38% of singles – it makes sense that companies offering services for daters operate with security and privacy in mind. Unfortunately, most people don’t realize how much information they are voluntarily sharing when they sign up and post photos on their phone.

Members also might not realize what information a dating website or app is collecting about them and their social media networks, say if a Facebook login is used to sign up. Though most companies will outline what information they can collect about you and your friends, the fine print is often overlooked by users just trying to download and check out a new app.

A few states require online dating sites to disclose whether they conduct criminal background checks on members, including Illinois, New York, New Jersey and Texas. eHarmony, Match, and Sparks Networks signed an agreement with the California District Attorney’s office in 2012 to check subscribers against national sex offender registries and provide a rapid abuse reporting system for members. Security precautions are being taken to protect users, but legislators like Al Franken and privacy advocates don’t think it’s enough.

Rainey Reitman of the San Francisco, Calif.-based Electronic Frontier Foundation, a nonprofit that advocates for user privacy amid technology development, told USA Today: "People don't realize how much information they're exposing even by doing something as slight as uploading a photograph. Many online apps are very cavalier about collecting that information and perhaps exposing it in a way that would make you uncomfortable."

Finding love on OkCupid: good. Getting scammed out of thousands of dollars on OkCupid: not so much.

Unfortunately for Michael Picciano, he falls into the latter category. Picciano is now suing OkCupid and its parent company, IAC, for failing to conduct “even minimal screening of its subscribers and therefore deceptively creating the impression that their dating service was safe . . . when in fact . . . [it] was a trap for the unwary,” he says in his Manhattan civil suit.

It all began back in February 2013, when he received a message from “genuineguy62.” (Is it just me or is that, like, the least trustworthy name ever?) After 10 days of chatting on the site, Picciano continued the conversation with the man, who called himself Bruce Thompson, via personal e-mails. A month following that, Thompson made his first telephone call to Picciano. And by the end of March, the two had canceled their OkCupid subscriptions because “they had found each other.”

Shortly afterwards, Thompson asked Picciano to wire him money to cover “unexpected fees ”incurred while setting up a new computer parts business. Picciano says he made four wire transfers in steadily increasing amounts to addresses in Texas, Ontario and England. In total, the payments added up to $70,460.

Four weeks following his first payment, Picciano involved the police. A friend of his had found Thompson's photo and information on a site called MaleScammers.com and warned Picciano. Picciano handed over a $100,000 forged check given to him by Thompson to the police, but they were unable to find the con man’s fingerprints.

Picciano is faulting OkCupid for failing to "exercise reasonable care" in communicating "the dangers associated with online matchmaking." There is, however, a page on the site called "Safety Tips" that explicitly warns members against wiring money to other users – or anyone they meet online – because the sender “has no protections against loss.”

In addition to going after OkCupid, Picciano is also suing Capital One for "failure to comply with proper procedures for the transmission of wire funds transfers." The lawsuit allages that none of the wire transfers contained the address of the recipient "as required by law."

According to the court papers, Picciano believes Thompson is back on OkCupid, trolling for new victims under the screen name "bigheartedbt.” While this hasn’t been confirmed, OkCupid users should take note – better safe than sorry.

There are plenty of niche dating sites available for the picky dater – whether you’re into men or women with the same political preferences, vegetarian eating habits, or love of horses, there’s a site for you.

But what about the touchy subject of STDs? Although our society is more open to talking about sex, many people are still freaked out by the mention of contracting an STD. It’s not sexy – in fact, it’s enough to kill the romance on any date. So what’s the best way to approach dating when you have an STD?

According to the CDC (Center for Disease Control) even though one out of every six people aged 14 to 49 years have genital herpes, there is still a stigma about it when it comes to dating. According to research from the University of Michigan, giving someone an easily cured STD is considered to be worse than giving that person a fatal flu.

Which is why a number of online dating sites have been created to serve this growing market of singles who test positive for anything from Herpes to HIV. Instead of making STDs a stigma, these sites are helping people move past the inevitable and uncomfortable conversations with their dates to be able to focus on getting to know each other. In other words, STD dating sites help members date like everyone else.

Some STD-focused dating sites include PositivesDating.com, STDMatch.net, and PositiveSingles.com among others. (You can match by the type of STD on most of these sites.) Many offer systems of support to members, too – including counseling, support groups, and STD treatment locations. They are providing a much-needed service for those who feel intimidated or embarrassed by their disease.

But there’s a catch: even if you and your date share the same STD, you might not share the same strain. There are more than 100 types of HPV for example. Because an STD can weaken your body’s immune system, it makes it easier to pick up other ones, too. So you might be accumulating and worsening the problem by having sex with a date who shares the same STD.

Ultimately, whether you use an STD dating site to meet people or not, you should still exercise the same precautions as you would with anyone else. Don’t look at joining an STD site as a sexual free-for-all. Use protection like you would with anyone else you date, whether or not you have an STD. And don’t hesitate to get tested.

For more on a dating site for members with STDs you can read our Positive Singles review.

Single baseball fans are about to hit a home run.

If you’ve checked out the homepage of pretty much any Major League Baseball team recently, you probably saw a few ads advertising other single sports fans. On Athletics.com, for instance, ads on each side of the page featured an attractive group of potential matches and text that read "Meet other single Athletics fans.” A banner ad across the top said “Take them out to the Athletics game.”

What’s going on?

With baseball's regular season here, Match and MLB.com are coming together to give singles another reason to cheer this season. Baseball fanatics on Match.com will have the opportunity to connect online through 29 different fan pages (one for every U.S. team) for the duration of the 2014 MLB season – meaning they have way more to look forward to this year than their team making it to the World Series.

To get started, Match members can announce their allegiance to their favorite team (or teams, if they’re the indecisive type) by adding its logo to their profile. Match members can also search for other fans using a new community search tool that allows them to easily connect with members who have also added their favorite team to their profiles.

On the other side of things, MLB.com will be promoting 29 different MLB Club portals where singles can search for and connect with other fans of their favorite teams. When you find a fellow fan who tickles your fancy, you can take them out to the ballgame for the perfect first date.

Noah Garden, Major League Baseball Advanced Media's executive vice president of revenue, said "the Match.com conversation is one we've had on and off over the years to see if there's something we could do together." MLB hopes the promotion will give ticket sales a boost. "The idea is put like people together with similar interest and passion," he said. "There's still always room for more butts in the seats."

It sounds a little blunt, but I guess you've gotta appreciate the guy's honesty. And I'm sure there are plenty of die-hard baseball fans who will be pleased about having an easy way to weed out rivals. In fact, Match.com President Amarnath Thombre said the first question self-identified Yankees fans often ask of singles on the site is: "Who hates the Red Sox?"

Better have your answer ready before you log on to Match.com, baseball fans, or you just might strike out. For more on this service you can read our Match.com review.

People who participate in online dating may be more open to interracial relationships than those who stick solely to traditional dating, says a study published in the Journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

Researchers from the University of California, San Diego analyzed the first interactions of 126,134 American OkCupid users to study the complex relationship tween online dating and race. They found, unsurprisingly, that many users tended to send messages to other users of their own race – but they also found that they were much more likely to respond to messages from users of a different racial background. The study also found that once an individual responded to a member of another race, they were even more likely to initiate conversation with other users of different ethnicities in the future.

"It's not that people's levels of prejudice are changing; people are avoiding others from a different racial background because they think those other people won't be interested," study author Kevin Lewis, a sociologist for UC San Diego, told USA Today. "Receiving an interracial contact and replying to it makes you send over twice as many new interracial messages in the short-term future than you would have otherwise."

Online daters may be chipping away at racial barriers, but that doesn't mean they've fallen completely. "Race as a dividing factor is much more important than basically any other attribute," Lewis explained. The study found that white online daters, both male and female, overwhelmingly made contact with other white users (although that's also due to the fact that there are more white people on OkCupid to choose from). Caucasian users were also the most likely to seek out people of another race. Those who identified as black, Hispanic, Indian or Asian were much more likely to stay within their own racial lane while online dating.

The only group that consistently bucked the trend was Asian women. Asian women were more likely to contact white men and other Asian men. They were also more likely to respond to white men (though it's important to note that all races were most likely to respond to white men).

Lewis calls online daters’ reluctance to reach out to users of different ethnic backgrounds "pre-emptive discrimination." Based on the way race has shaped their lives so far, they expect to experience rejection – or at least to have little in common with someone who doesn't share their heritage. But, says Lewis, the study suggests that if someone is bold enough to make the first move and overcome their fear of rejection, they are rewarded with the realization that the pool of potential partners is wider and richer than they had ever imagined.