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I became reacquainted recently with this girl through facebook I use to know from college. After a week or so of texts and emails she told me she had a boyfriend so I immediately backed off. Some a** went after my last girlfriend which actually ended the relationship. I do not want to be that type of guy.

She emailed me again last week talking about her day at work. We start up our conversations again and then a few days ago she mentions that we should go out for a coffee.

I let her know that would be fine but I do not want to upset her boyfriend. She said she would check with him but is should be okay. Since then our texting has turned more personal lately and I find that I am starting to like her. She asked were we should meet so it sounds like she got approval for the coffee. I do not want to be the cause of a relationship breakup here. What should I do?

I bet you she had a secret crush on you in college. All this getting permission stuff sounds a little wonky. Since it seems more personal to you I would go see her for coffee and see where things go. If it looks like she is interested in you and you still want to date her I would give her an ultimatum. Wait a few days and see if she contacts you for another “date”. I would then tell her that you would like to go out with her but not while she has a boyfriend since you are interested in her. She should respect you more for that answer and if she is worth anything she would agree either to end her current relationship or stop looking for something on the side!