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Is FetLife good?


CCBad
Anonymous
Is FetLife a good community to join? I have yet to find a good dating service that supports my fetish.
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Jess
Anonymous
I have had good luck with them before when I used them a few years ago. Not sure how they are now.

Jess
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chattel
Anonymous
It is good, in my opinion, and it seems that also in the opinion of many many others who use it frequently.

There's also a fresh alternative around, called the cage, https://thecage.co

Seems like in a league of it's own comparing to what we are used to in the genre...

It's not half as big as Fetlife, but it's not small either.

Have a look.
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Rasputin: lover of the Russian queen
Anonymous
Fetlife isn't a dating site in any way shape or form, it's more of a social site, it has none of the functionalities of a dating site, the search functionality is barely useful, it's more for people setting up social events, a lot of the women and just trying to get you to purchase photos or videos, if you don't mind seeing every other guy with a dick pic as their profile picture and realize it's not a dating site you'll be ok
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vassal
Anonymous
smart
In a word : NO ! Fetlife is awful for dating

Why not ??

1st, it states it is not, and actively structures itself to make it difficult to use it as dating site

2nd, it's recently listened to social justice clamoring (external & internal), and further strengthened its anti-dating stance in the form of reducing ability of some "workarounds" that some (mostly all men) sometimes used, to contact women.
(Fetlife did this very reluctantly, knowing it was further reducing its appeal to men)
Major part of SJW clamoring, was that women were feeling uncomfortable posting sexipics of themselves, reducing a womans ability to "safely express her inner self" (because bad men would send bad messages)

If you understand that certain women live to preen before other women (plus harbor secret fantasy that some gorgeous monied Knight will rescue them from all doldrums of life), you'll understand their tragic complaint.

3rd, some women (pay attention to the gender here) DO use it as a meet/date site, because...they can !
Posting enticing pics of themselves, then enjoying responding to say, just 1 out of 100 messages, to one that seems closest to trifecta combo of: "Generous", Very attractive, Pliable to everything she wants.
Then finding some fault, delete, repeat next day with next 100 messages (because there's an endless supply) - while complaining about where are all the "good" men.


So, then what is Fetlife for ???
It's all about those who excel at social preening & witticisms, endless threads about endless topics, local goings-on, and about local personalities, with much whining & much "positioning".

Now, who do you think this appeals to ? Once you understand that, you'll understand why it's NOT for you.

P.S. Certain types of Couples, can have some success "dating" on it. (But see 3 above)
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