Speed Dating 101: Tips for Success

Advice
  • Friday, October 01 2010 @ 09:11 am
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I hosted speed dating events for about 6 years, and I often saw the same mistakes repeated again and again. If you've tried speed dating without much success, or if you haven't tried it at all, I'm asking you to reconsider and give it a go.

The key to successful speed dating is all in the attitude, much like regular dating. If you approach the evening as a way to have fun and meet new people, you will walk away happier than if you go in expecting to meet Mr. or Miss Right. It's all about networking and improving your own dating skills. By expanding your social circle, you meet new people and expand your dating options.

If you sign up for a speed dating event in the near future, try following some of these tips and see how you do:

Relax. I see many nervous speed daters because people take it too seriously. It's just a social event! You are meeting several people and seeing if you want to get to know them better. It's not a job interview!

Don't try to tell your life's story in five minutes. Guys, this is for you. Women are looking for connection, not lists of accomplishments. This isn't a contest. Instead of rattling off your successes, try asking them questions and engaging them. You'll get a lot further.

Don't be quick to judge. Women, this is for you. Instead of listing all the reasons why each guy you meet ISN'T right for you, try looking for things you DO like about each one. This will help you recognize the right guy more easily, what's most important to you, and also prevents you from being too quick to dismiss potential dates with great guys who might just be a little nervous or out of their element.

Realize that speed-dating is like online dating, but in person. You have no control over the kind of people you meet at speed-dating, but much like online dating, it provides a filter. With speed dating, you are filtering in person by seeing if there is any chemistry, while with online dating you filter online via pictures and profile. So be open to talking with everyone before you judge.