Online or In-Person?
- Monday, April 15 2013 @ 11:34 am
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 971
Online dating is an easy way to get excited about dating again: just look at all the prospects! All the possibilities! Anything can happen! On the other hand, we’re told not to get too attached: many first-contact emails never get a response, or receive a negative one. Be read to fall in love! But not so much that you get your heart broken unnecessarily. It can be a tough balance to strike, so what are some guidelines?
You don’t really need a thick rulebook to navigate these waters. Instead ask yourself one simple question: online or in-person? If the answer is online, maintain your emotional distance. If you’re in-person, it might be time to open yourself up to the possibilities.
For example: you come across a profile that really piques your interest. This person seems clever, compassionate, interesting - and they’re attractive, too! Sure, you’ve emailed other people, but you’re really waiting to hear back from this person, because you really think you might have something!
Wait, take a breath, and ask yourself: online or in-person? So far, your only opinion is based on something you’ve read online. You don’t even know if they’re the one who wrote it, or if you’ll actually click in person. Don’t get emotionally invested just yet.
In another instance, you began a first date a little apprehensive and shy, but soon you were chatting like you’d known each other for years. Your date seemed to be having just as much fun as you were. There did seem to be a little spark of chemistry. But wait - are you falling too fast? Should you make yourself focus on more profiles until you see how this plays out?
Ask the question: online or in-person? You’ve now determined that you have some sort of connection in person, and a first date has gone well, from your perspective. So first, find out if your date is on the same page. If they are, and want to get together again, now isn’t really the time to hedge your bets or divide your mental attention. At this point, let your heart lead.
It may seem overly simple, but when it comes to online dating, many emotional pickles can be navigated by asking yourself that one question. Remember, the online site is just to allow you to set up a meeting; it’s not generally where you fall in love. But once you’ve forged a connection in person, there’s no reason to think about percentages and numbers; regardless what the eventual conclusion may be, it’s time to get out of your own head and enjoy the whirlwind of a new romance.
You don’t really need a thick rulebook to navigate these waters. Instead ask yourself one simple question: online or in-person? If the answer is online, maintain your emotional distance. If you’re in-person, it might be time to open yourself up to the possibilities.
For example: you come across a profile that really piques your interest. This person seems clever, compassionate, interesting - and they’re attractive, too! Sure, you’ve emailed other people, but you’re really waiting to hear back from this person, because you really think you might have something!
Wait, take a breath, and ask yourself: online or in-person? So far, your only opinion is based on something you’ve read online. You don’t even know if they’re the one who wrote it, or if you’ll actually click in person. Don’t get emotionally invested just yet.
In another instance, you began a first date a little apprehensive and shy, but soon you were chatting like you’d known each other for years. Your date seemed to be having just as much fun as you were. There did seem to be a little spark of chemistry. But wait - are you falling too fast? Should you make yourself focus on more profiles until you see how this plays out?
Ask the question: online or in-person? You’ve now determined that you have some sort of connection in person, and a first date has gone well, from your perspective. So first, find out if your date is on the same page. If they are, and want to get together again, now isn’t really the time to hedge your bets or divide your mental attention. At this point, let your heart lead.
It may seem overly simple, but when it comes to online dating, many emotional pickles can be navigated by asking yourself that one question. Remember, the online site is just to allow you to set up a meeting; it’s not generally where you fall in love. But once you’ve forged a connection in person, there’s no reason to think about percentages and numbers; regardless what the eventual conclusion may be, it’s time to get out of your own head and enjoy the whirlwind of a new romance.
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