Online Dating Archetypes

If you're new to online dating, the world of cyber romance is fresh, exhilarating, and rife with nervous excitement. The Internet offers endless possibilities for your love life, from meeting your perfect match halfway across the globe to discovering that the love of your life is a long-lost childhood friend who lives 10 miles away. Online dating means having the chance to connect with millions of people from all walks of life, with diverse and distinctive personalities, interests, hobbies, and ambitions.

Right?

Well...sort of.

As children, we're taught that we are special, one-of-a-kind individuals. Our mannerisms, habits, likes, dislikes, talents, shortcomings, interests, and experiences are unique and exceptional. And while that's true in many ways, spending months, years, or even just a few hours on online dating sites tells a second story: there is a surprising number of ways in which we are alike, too.

Most of us are trained to reject labels and personal categorizations on the grounds that they are unfair, inaccurate, and restrictive, but Internet dating is one situation in which it can actually be beneficial to put aside your aversion to classification. I know it sounds crazy, but trust me on this one. There are three reasons I would encourage you to give categorization a shot:

1. A few photographs and some text in a profile are all you have to go on when determining if you're interested in someone online. If you know what kind of person you're looking for, you can focus on searching for people who fit into that category - or archetype, if you will - instead of wasting your time slogging through a continuous parade of dead-end profiles.
2. Number two is the follow-up to number one: if you know what type of people you are generally not interested in, you can easily avoid them. A word to the wise, however: don't be so picky that you miss out on amazing opportunities! Sometimes good relationships come from unexpected sources.
3. The final reason I would suggest a foray into classification takes its cue from the business and self-improvement worlds: personal branding. When you understand who you are (or who you want others to perceive you as, which may or may not be the same thing) you can ensure that you present yourself in a way that creates the desired impression. Take some time to think about the kind of person you're attracted to. Consider their personality traits, physical appearance, goals, skills, etc., and then determine what archetype or archetypes they represent. Now think about what kind of people your ideal match is attracted to - what archetypes do they epitomize? When you've figured it out, you can modify your profile to present yourself in a way that it is designed to appeal to the people who appeal to you. Your chances of finding love online will increase dramatically.

You can read more about personal branding, impression management, and online identity management on Wikipedia.