Looking for Love? Try the Neighbors
- Friday, March 26 2010 @ 12:45 pm
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 2,580
Occasionally we'll hear a story where someone has found the love of their life through online dating – only to find out that they've actually lived down the street the entire time. While this story is certainly touching and plausible, what does it say about how we live today?
I completely understand the plight of those living in a big city like Los Angeles or New York; there's thousands of people crammed into a tiny space, and it would be impossible to know everyone. Similarly, those living in rural areas might go months without encountering a neighbor, and they'd have to go out of their way to have a conversation.
But most people live in suburban areas, in subdivisions or apartment complexes or neighborhoods. They live in situations where neighbors are easily accessible, and there's not as much turnover as you'd expect in a city. Most new developments place houses so close together you have to avoid looking into each other's windows. And yet, the days of block parties and borrowing sugar seem less likely than they were ten, even five years ago.
How can we expect to find love when even meeting the neighbors is an insurmountable task? How can we lament about the lack of local prospects when we don't even know what the local prospects are?
I am all for utilizing technology, and that includes online dating. But really we are at our best when we are well-rounded, and I think that applies to our social skills as well. Some can deliver witty jokes via email, but are tongue-tied in person, and if we want our relationships to jump the hurdle from virtual to reality, we've got to have the skills to make it happen. So, next chance you get, try to meet the neighbors. It's a good exercise in first impressions and social situations, and you could meet someone who becomes a new friend – or maybe even something more.
I completely understand the plight of those living in a big city like Los Angeles or New York; there's thousands of people crammed into a tiny space, and it would be impossible to know everyone. Similarly, those living in rural areas might go months without encountering a neighbor, and they'd have to go out of their way to have a conversation.
But most people live in suburban areas, in subdivisions or apartment complexes or neighborhoods. They live in situations where neighbors are easily accessible, and there's not as much turnover as you'd expect in a city. Most new developments place houses so close together you have to avoid looking into each other's windows. And yet, the days of block parties and borrowing sugar seem less likely than they were ten, even five years ago.
How can we expect to find love when even meeting the neighbors is an insurmountable task? How can we lament about the lack of local prospects when we don't even know what the local prospects are?
I am all for utilizing technology, and that includes online dating. But really we are at our best when we are well-rounded, and I think that applies to our social skills as well. Some can deliver witty jokes via email, but are tongue-tied in person, and if we want our relationships to jump the hurdle from virtual to reality, we've got to have the skills to make it happen. So, next chance you get, try to meet the neighbors. It's a good exercise in first impressions and social situations, and you could meet someone who becomes a new friend – or maybe even something more.
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