Language: Clarity and Warmth
- Saturday, November 17 2012 @ 03:42 pm
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 1,313
Have you ever been around someone who was just so positive you felt happy simply being around them? Most of us would greatly prefer to spend time with such people, as opposed to those who seem to carry their own personal raincloud. Well, even if you aren’t always sunshine and rainbows, you can still add a bit of that warmth to your profile: it’s all the in language that we use.
Think of your profile as something like a conversation with your reader. Now imagine a real conversation: you ask someone to dinner. They hesitate, then say, “Sure, that sounds fine.” Now imagine the conversation going a different way: they say, “Absolutely, I’d love to.” Which response would you rather get - the one that’s open to a vast number of interpretations, or the one that is enthusiastic and affirmative?
Now consider that as you write your profile. You don’t have to fake enthusiasm you don’t actually have, but as you write about your interests, your job, the movies and music you love, make sure your feelings are reflected in the language you use. And be specific! If you love your job, say so, and maybe talk about why you’re so passionate. Remember to emphasize the positive; for example, if you’re not nuts about your job, talk about how relaxing or exciting the weekend is, instead of why you count down the minutes until Friday afternoon.
Remember to carry through the same ideas in your emails and even in person on your first date. Dating can be so confusing and nerve-wracking; a little clarity and positivity is always appreciated. Think of it from your perspective: wouldn’t you rather your date made it absolutely clear when they were having a good time, or if they wanted to see you again? Even if you’re not purposely playing mind games, it’s possible to be less clear than you mean to, especially in written communication.
So as you write that profile, send off that email or even leave a phone message, consider the language and tone you’re using. Are you accurately reflecting your thoughts and intent? Is any unwanted negativity creeping in? Are you giving your opinions the passion they deserve? A great benefit of online dating is the ability to proofread your thoughts before they’re out in public; why not make a warm first impression with something unquestionably positive?
Think of your profile as something like a conversation with your reader. Now imagine a real conversation: you ask someone to dinner. They hesitate, then say, “Sure, that sounds fine.” Now imagine the conversation going a different way: they say, “Absolutely, I’d love to.” Which response would you rather get - the one that’s open to a vast number of interpretations, or the one that is enthusiastic and affirmative?
Now consider that as you write your profile. You don’t have to fake enthusiasm you don’t actually have, but as you write about your interests, your job, the movies and music you love, make sure your feelings are reflected in the language you use. And be specific! If you love your job, say so, and maybe talk about why you’re so passionate. Remember to emphasize the positive; for example, if you’re not nuts about your job, talk about how relaxing or exciting the weekend is, instead of why you count down the minutes until Friday afternoon.
Remember to carry through the same ideas in your emails and even in person on your first date. Dating can be so confusing and nerve-wracking; a little clarity and positivity is always appreciated. Think of it from your perspective: wouldn’t you rather your date made it absolutely clear when they were having a good time, or if they wanted to see you again? Even if you’re not purposely playing mind games, it’s possible to be less clear than you mean to, especially in written communication.
So as you write that profile, send off that email or even leave a phone message, consider the language and tone you’re using. Are you accurately reflecting your thoughts and intent? Is any unwanted negativity creeping in? Are you giving your opinions the passion they deserve? A great benefit of online dating is the ability to proofread your thoughts before they’re out in public; why not make a warm first impression with something unquestionably positive?
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