Great Expectations
- Thursday, July 08 2010 @ 09:46 am
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 1,839
The world of online dating has opened doors for many. However, from time to time I meet people whose expectations of online dating sites are on a whole new level.
There's the guy who expects to meet women, but refuses to email any, because he's heard women can get away without doing any work so he should too. It's silly, but sadly not entirely uncommon. These types of people apparently want websites to do the wooing.
However, I can top that: I recently met a woman who expected her online dating site to do the thinking. You see, she had met a man from a website that prides itself on its high caliber of singles. Well, high-caliber he may have been; single he was not. He cheerfully filled her in on the first date.
She was outraged – not just at the unfaithful married man, but at the online dating website that had brought the two together. Apparently, the site should have – what? Performed a background check? Done follow-up surveillance to make sure he matched his picture as well? I'm not sure exactly what she was looking for, and I doubt she really knew either.
An online dating site is merely a tool to meet new people. It's a supplement to dating; it doesn't do the dating for you. Just as in the world, someone has to say hello to get the ball rolling. And just as in the real world, sometimes people aren't as perfect as they might appear at first glance. That's where the discernment comes in, the trial period where two people figure out if they're really right for each other. Even if someone is less than honest on a profile, hopefully all truths will out in this trial period before real life decisions are made. Such a trial period is highly recommended by most in successful relationships. It's called dating.
There's the guy who expects to meet women, but refuses to email any, because he's heard women can get away without doing any work so he should too. It's silly, but sadly not entirely uncommon. These types of people apparently want websites to do the wooing.
However, I can top that: I recently met a woman who expected her online dating site to do the thinking. You see, she had met a man from a website that prides itself on its high caliber of singles. Well, high-caliber he may have been; single he was not. He cheerfully filled her in on the first date.
She was outraged – not just at the unfaithful married man, but at the online dating website that had brought the two together. Apparently, the site should have – what? Performed a background check? Done follow-up surveillance to make sure he matched his picture as well? I'm not sure exactly what she was looking for, and I doubt she really knew either.
An online dating site is merely a tool to meet new people. It's a supplement to dating; it doesn't do the dating for you. Just as in the world, someone has to say hello to get the ball rolling. And just as in the real world, sometimes people aren't as perfect as they might appear at first glance. That's where the discernment comes in, the trial period where two people figure out if they're really right for each other. Even if someone is less than honest on a profile, hopefully all truths will out in this trial period before real life decisions are made. Such a trial period is highly recommended by most in successful relationships. It's called dating.
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