Do You Need a “Pre-Date?”

In the world of online dating, you're hoping for a few things when it comes to finally meeting the person you've seen online. You hope they look like their pictures, have the personality of a prince or princess and make your toes tingle and that you can carry on a conversation with them without all of those uncomfortable gaps. Not so much to ask for, right? Instead of sweating it out and planning a whole day together for a first meeting, why not try a pre-date?

Pre-dates are as honest as honest can be. Find time to meet at a coffee shop, a park, for a *censored*tail...something with less stress that allows the two of you to get to know one another without committing to an entire meal, movie or day together. There are many benefits to setting yourself up on a pre-date (for you and your date!) and they go way beyond scheduling.

By allowing yourselves an "out," you've already taken the pressure off to be tolerant of a person you may not end up clicking with. If you click, great! Then it's onward to dinner or lunch and whatever else you might feel like doing. If you don't click, however, you can each go your separate ways without that lingering obligation to eat your dinner or pay for someone's dinner.

Another benefit to the pre-date is that you can explore places that may not be suitable for a whole date. Quirky bookstores or dive record shops, give yourself the opportunity to be who you are in an environment that's meaningful. The pre-date gives you way more flexibility and lets you share something important with your date without the burden of wondering if he or she prefers milk or soy milk in their latte.

So, give yourself permission: set the date before the date! Add some adventure into the online dating process and let your date know that you're open to meeting new people and look forward to a pressure-free beginning.