Dating Detox: How to let go and Rebuild for the Future

We all hit a dating slump at one time or another. The problem is when we can't seem to lift ourselves out of it, whether it's because we've recently been dumped or we've just grown tired of the same old patterns.

If you feel like your dating life needs a serious overhaul, following are some steps you can take to unwind and recharge so you can put your best foot forward again.

Take a break from dating. This may be stating the obvious, but some people want to just keep charging through even when they've hit a wall. Instead of being stubborn and willing yourself to keep dating and trying to find "better" people, take a step back. Take a deep breath. Take a break. Remind yourself: other people aren't always the problem or the solution. When you're dating, it's important to be in a healthy, positive place so that you can attract like-minded people to you.

Let go of the past. We all allow past relationships to influence our beliefs and actions to some extent when we're dating, but it's important to let go of what might be holding you back. If you haven't gotten over a past love, then go through the grieving process. If you think all men are cheaters or all women are crazy, you'll see this reflected in the people you date. Letting go and moving forward is a choice. When you're holding on to regrets, grievances, and unhealthy emotions, you hold yourself back from future relationships.

Refuel. I focus on this a lot, but it's very important to nourish yourself when you're in a process of transformation. A recent break-up can make you especially vulnerable, since you might be used to doing things as a couple rather than being alone. Maybe you don't know what you really like doing, or what your tastes are. This is the best time to find out! Try doing things that interest you. Start taking classes, exercising, getting a massage, and seeing friends. Having little things to look forward to on a regular basis add up over time to a healthier, happier lifestyle.

Stay away from negativity. It's tempting to go out with our single friends and complain about dating, but is this the healthy way to go? Instead of indulging each other in tales of who has the worst dating life and how depressing the pool is, try hanging out with couples and people who are happier in their dating lives. Not only will this leave you with more energy at the end of the night, but you might learn how they do it.

Approach dating with a lighter heart. Easier said than done, right? But this is an important step. Don't obsess over what might have gone wrong in the past or what you might have said. Start fresh. Try doing something new on your next date so you don't fall into the same patterns. Mix it up. Think about how you might have fun.