A Skill That's Not So Useless
- Friday, May 21 2010 @ 08:07 am
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 2,030
Using an online dating site can be a lifesaver for the particularly shy, or for those who find it easier to express themselves through writing. No longer is the first impression based entirely on a single skill that might not be their best! They can play to their strengths first.
However, there always comes the inevitable day when a face-to-face meeting is necessary. For many, it's as though all the work on the dating site is erased; they feel the first-impression jitters all over again. And really, maybe they're right to be a little nervous; despite the best connections online, it's the chemistry in person that will make the strongest impression.
So, if you're painfully shy or you trip over your tongue, how can you best prepare for those first in-person meetings? The answer is simple: practice. Perhaps, for some, their shyness is truly a life-long problem, but for others it's simply that they've gotten out of practice. The Internet has made it possible to even order and pay for a pizza online; human interaction is reduced to the bare minimum.
'Practice' does not mean approaching members of the opposite sex cold and asking them out. Rather, start small; strike up a conversation with a postal worker, a checkout girl, an old man in the voting lines. Practice, literally, making small talk. Any new meeting, no matter how intense the online connection, will start with some amount of small talk. It's a handy skill to have.
Once you're comfortable chatting with people for whom you have no romantic interest, try bumping it up a notch. Ask an attractive person for directions, or if they know where to find the ketchup in the grocery store. Don't expect anything to come out of this tiny encounter; you're simply honing your skills.
With diligent practice, you'll feel more confident in any social situation, even the dreaded first encounter. And who knows? You might even become so skilled that you skip the Internet altogether!
However, there always comes the inevitable day when a face-to-face meeting is necessary. For many, it's as though all the work on the dating site is erased; they feel the first-impression jitters all over again. And really, maybe they're right to be a little nervous; despite the best connections online, it's the chemistry in person that will make the strongest impression.
So, if you're painfully shy or you trip over your tongue, how can you best prepare for those first in-person meetings? The answer is simple: practice. Perhaps, for some, their shyness is truly a life-long problem, but for others it's simply that they've gotten out of practice. The Internet has made it possible to even order and pay for a pizza online; human interaction is reduced to the bare minimum.
'Practice' does not mean approaching members of the opposite sex cold and asking them out. Rather, start small; strike up a conversation with a postal worker, a checkout girl, an old man in the voting lines. Practice, literally, making small talk. Any new meeting, no matter how intense the online connection, will start with some amount of small talk. It's a handy skill to have.
Once you're comfortable chatting with people for whom you have no romantic interest, try bumping it up a notch. Ask an attractive person for directions, or if they know where to find the ketchup in the grocery store. Don't expect anything to come out of this tiny encounter; you're simply honing your skills.
With diligent practice, you'll feel more confident in any social situation, even the dreaded first encounter. And who knows? You might even become so skilled that you skip the Internet altogether!
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