A Simple Question
- Saturday, October 08 2011 @ 11:07 am
- Contributed by: Jet
- Views: 1,399
It’s probably not a surprise to many that a relationship is comprised of unique individuals, and thus is unique itself. There are tips to having a successful relationship, to be sure, but all advice must be heard with consideration for the individuals involved, and tweaked accordingly. Perhaps it’s a bit like parenting: you’re nurturing something, you want it to be as strong as it can, and you’re the only one who really knows what it needs.
There’s something people in relationships, or seeking a relationship, can forget, and that is that they are one of the individuals involved. They’re one of the people they’re seeking to make happy.
The question “Does this make me happy?” is so simple that it can seem silly, but it’s also so simple it’s often forgotten. There are so many other reasons to get in a relationship, or stay in one: the expectations of friends, family, even society. But just as one size does not always fit all, some people are happiest, at various times in their life, in less common relationships.
Perhaps, at this stage, you’re best fit for a relationship that focuses on the physical, instead of fulfilling emotional needs. Maybe you want a relationship that is exactly like a typical one, but you don’t want to co-habitate. Maybe you’d like the companionship of dating, and nothing more. Whether it’s merely a stage in your life or the only way you’re truly happy, there’s nothing wrong with being aware of your personal needs. In fact, it’s kinder to all in the long run. Why enter a relationship with someone who has certain expectations and hopes, only to have one or both of you unhappy?
One of the benefits of online dating is that you can search out people who match your priorities, whatever they may be. It might be hard to meet someone who’s looking for the same sort of relationship as you at the supermarket, but if they’re on the internet, it might only take a few key words. But whether you meet someone online or bump into them at the post office, it’s important to be honest about what you’re looking for. In the long run, deception never really saves any feelings.
So as you sit down to search for a match, ask yourself what you’re really looking for. Not just as a person, but as the other half of your relationship. What sort of relationship do you want to form? And, quite simply, what will make you happy?
There’s something people in relationships, or seeking a relationship, can forget, and that is that they are one of the individuals involved. They’re one of the people they’re seeking to make happy.
The question “Does this make me happy?” is so simple that it can seem silly, but it’s also so simple it’s often forgotten. There are so many other reasons to get in a relationship, or stay in one: the expectations of friends, family, even society. But just as one size does not always fit all, some people are happiest, at various times in their life, in less common relationships.
Perhaps, at this stage, you’re best fit for a relationship that focuses on the physical, instead of fulfilling emotional needs. Maybe you want a relationship that is exactly like a typical one, but you don’t want to co-habitate. Maybe you’d like the companionship of dating, and nothing more. Whether it’s merely a stage in your life or the only way you’re truly happy, there’s nothing wrong with being aware of your personal needs. In fact, it’s kinder to all in the long run. Why enter a relationship with someone who has certain expectations and hopes, only to have one or both of you unhappy?
One of the benefits of online dating is that you can search out people who match your priorities, whatever they may be. It might be hard to meet someone who’s looking for the same sort of relationship as you at the supermarket, but if they’re on the internet, it might only take a few key words. But whether you meet someone online or bump into them at the post office, it’s important to be honest about what you’re looking for. In the long run, deception never really saves any feelings.
So as you sit down to search for a match, ask yourself what you’re really looking for. Not just as a person, but as the other half of your relationship. What sort of relationship do you want to form? And, quite simply, what will make you happy?
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