Comments for Not Ready For Online Dating? This Might Be Why.

Not Ready For Online Dating? This Might Be Why. | 1 comments | Create New Account

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I have only been online dating for 2 months

Authored by: NorthShore on Friday, June 03 2016 @ 07:38 pm

I have the complete opposite issue of what your article is talking about. My problem is it's very hard for me to get to know someone meeting through text messages and emails. Everything feels very generically described and it also feels somewhat scripted to me. I get that it's the first step to meeting someone online, however, for me it feels very uncomfortable to "get to know someone/connect" this way. I understand and know that people are busy, myself included, but messaging usually is very spread out and not like an actual conversation.

I have messaged about 50 different women with about 10 of them responding. 3 of those people were more interested than the others since we messaged more than just a few times. So my problem is after texting back and forth 50-100 times throughout the week and it seems like we are getting along I ask them out and all 3 of them said yes to having drinks. (Just to clarify I don't talk to these women all at once, I move on to a new one rather quickly if the person stops texting me.) Then I continue to text a little here and there to say hi, see how their day is going or to chat a little more. Then this problem happens....

One woman said something came up with one of her sister's and will let me know when she can reschedule. I have talked to her a few random times since, but she wasn't responding as much as before she rescheduled. The other 2 came up with work related excuses and needed to also reschedule. I told them both no problem, if they were busy with work stuff this week to just shoot me a text when they had time. I did want to text them more often to stay "connected" but not so much that I'm pestering them or making them feel like I'm needy/desperate. After I feel the conversations are going well I get very excited and I genuinely want to meet that person, not continue to text back and forth like we're in middle school! Am I too impatient? Is there something I'm doing wrong? Any help would be great! These have been done on Match.com FYI.

For me, I am 33 years old, 6'2", 205 lbs, brown hair, blue eyes. I am not a super model, but I have been told by many women that I'm cute. On my first email to someone I really focus on writing something about what they've written in their profile. I may subtly add in a flirty compliment and say something nice about how they dress or look (ie gorgeous hair or eyes) but I really didn't want to focus these initial conversations on how good they look. The main reason I don't is the many, many profiles that say "if you call me hun, babe, sugar, cutie, beautiful,etc, etc or ask to exchange nude pics or are just here to hook up to please move on." Again, in face to face situations I'm usually good at subtly flirting or calling them beautiful at the right times, where it doesn't seem creepy or that I'm solely about their looks. Am I not edgy enough in my texts/emails? Do I say too many respectful generic things? Am I too upfront about wanting to meet them? I don't know I feel like I'm doing something wrong!

Thanks for reading if you made it this far :)

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