How to Avoid “Perfect Date Pitfalls”

They're the dates we dream of: perfect ones. Where the chai tea latte was just the right temperature, your date was exactly how he or she looked in their pictures, the steak was cooked to perfection and you both clicked like a metronome. You walk away thinking, "This is the one!"

And then the phone never rings again. Your calls go unanswered and you're left wondering, "Was it something I said? Did they get hit by a bus? Maybe they moved to Tanzania?!?"

There are some simple steps you can take to avoid the Perfect Date Blues. While something odd is going to happen during your dating career every now and then, you can keep the oddness from happening more often than not with a few precautionary moves. Keep your head and heart in the game!

Avoid the Pre-Date Build-Up
Especially in online dating, it's easy to have the tendency to carry on pre-first date conversations a bit too long. Over email and the phone, we can be whomever we'd like and make people into most anything we want. Avoid putting yourself in the position of turning your potential date into PlayDoh and molding them into the person you'd like them to be instead of the person they really are. Establish reasonable time frames between making a connection with someone and having your first face-to-face. A week is a good guideline, two tops if your schedules can't seem to align. There's no replacement for in-person chemistry!

Ask the Awkward Question
Which question is that? "Would you like to do this again?" Sometimes it's just assumed that everyone at the table had as good a time as you - but think about those dates where you had a perfectly good time, but there was no thing. You can't put your finger on it and the person across from you would make a great friend. Heck, you could hang out with them for hours and days! But you just didn't see the romantic potential. Give your date an out, and if you're offered the out, remember what it feels like to have Mr. or Miss Wonderful go MIA on you after what you thought was a great date. Decline kindly and set that person free to find their ideal match. You're doing them a favor.

Keep it Brief
There's really no reason to have an epic first date. Keep your initial meeting brief. This is a good guideline to adhere to even if you're not on a first date from an online dating site. Grab coffee, talk a walk around the park, bring your pups to the dog park. Have a time limit and a place to be after. You'll know if you want to see one another again and if you have someplace to be instead of right there, you'll be more apt to start planning that next date right there! Give yourself the opportunity to have a life while looking for your perfect partner. If you're always available, there's no thrill of the hunt for your partner and nothing to look forward to. Limit your first date time and if the chemistry is right, create that awesome sense of urgency for scheduling the next go-round with Mr. or Miss Wonderful.

See? It's pretty easy to avoid the Perfect Date Blues. All you have to do is allow yourself the opportunity to be successful! Not every date is going to result in forever (and thank heavens for that), but those dates that do go well have a better chance of being a repeat event if you give them some breathing room.