Contributed by: ElyseRomano on Tuesday, June 19 2012 @ 09:27 am
Last modified on
Is it possible to know if you've met your match just by looking at an online dating profile? According to Kimberly Seltzer, the matchmaker and dating expert whose expertise is featured in Day Five of YourTango's online dating bootcamp, the answer is "yes." "Actually," she says, "there are a lot of things you can look at to determine whether a guy is good for you right from the get-go."
So what are they?
First, look at the profile picture. If your potential sweetie is wearing something inappropriate, posing in the bathroom, or in the (nearly) buff, they're probably only after one thing...and it isn't a serious relationship. If you're looking for someone to settle down with, they're probably not the guy or gal for you.
Seltzer also suggests looking at whether the photograph is clear or blurry. A picture that's difficult to see indicates that the person featured in it may be trying to hide something. It could be a conscious decision - to hide a physical feature like 50 extra pounds or a wedding ring - or an subconscious move that reflects the desire to hide an undesirable trait that isn't physical - like being unemployed for the past 3 years.
Now look at who else is in the picture. If there's no one else, it's a sign that they're taking the dating game seriously. If it's a picture full of other men or women, you may want to put the brakes on your courtship. They're probably too busy playing the field to settle down any time soon.
After you've assessed the picture, you're ready to take a look at the rest of the profile's content. Does the writing flow well? Does it feel almost like you're having a conversation? Writing that feels like a conversation could be a sign that the person has a good understanding of the give and take that must occur in a healthy relationship. On the other hand, if it feels like they're trying to sell something to you, or are only interested in talking about themselves, consider it a red flag.
The user name also holds clues to a person's potential as a partner, says Seltzer. If the screenname is hyper-sexual, you know exactly what kind of date you're in for. If you're looking for something fun and casual, that person is a good bet. If not, look somewhere else. Relationship material IS out there, as long as you know how to look for it.
To see the video, click here[*1] .
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