I have had good luck with singlesnet.com.
However - I have to agree there is something fishy about the flirts thing. For several months, on about 2-3 different days per month, I would get swamped with flirts from women. It seems like they were all in one general area - and never near me. I just ignored them.
But other than that - most of my 'flirts' are from real women - many of them paying members, who I have exchanged e-mails with. One of which I am still dating (after a year) - and one of which I dated on a single occasion (awesome lady, but wanted a long-term exclusive relationship; I had one of those for 25 years - I need a break). I even got an e-mail from someone that knew my primary lady friend's name - and told me I was being a 'bad boy' by posting a profile on there.
You CAN exchange e-mails with paying members - send and receive - even if you are not a paying member.
And after a year - I see nothing else fishy about the site. Many of the same women have been on there as non-paying members, then paying members, and then non-paying again. So, other than the excess flirts (which seem to have stopped the last few months) - seems quite legit to me.
bill