There are a lot of major and minor problems with dating online or using the personals as i prefer to call it.

But the main problem is that threr are too MANY dating sites.

Everyone and their dog has a Personals section.

And most have very few members, the small ones cost as much as the large ones that at least have some selection like match.com (even though I hate that site since all the women in the Dallas, Texas have profiles that they seem copied from each other and all sound the same).

I had REAL luck in Dallas in the 80's and 90's using the Dallas Observer which I have mentioned in other posts.

Back then, the DO was (and still is to a point) an alternative weekly paper.

But in the late 90's it got into the computer age.

While in the past, you bought space for so many words that were acutally in print in the back of the paper like an ad selling a car or something.. The women who responded to my print print ad wrote me free of charge since i paid for the ad. Some sent real photos, some wrote on nice stationary and ALL included a way of conatcting you in their orginal letter. None of this ten e mails before I give out my work or cell number.

And the biggest plus was that is was a local paper so it was unlikely that someone in another city or state would read it and respond. So you did not have women in Russia writing you and dating was mostly local and not hopping on a plane for a cup of coffee like some people seem willing to do for a first date.

So you had local people who actually were connecting.

And when I placed an ad, if a woman responded, she usually put sone effort into the reply so if I called her, she was actually HAPPY to hear from me.

So back to the main problem. There are just too many dating sites. I hate to admit it, but plenty of fish is good because it is the most popular free date site and has a membership that rivals some of the largest paid sites.

But the site is more about venting about dating than really dating. And most of the people on the site seem to be in Canada.

But I was looking at this new one called Craigslist.com.

Sure enough, ANOTHER Personals section. I don't know if it was free or not.

Too many sites say it is free to place and ad but want money to e mail members and some cost even to see how many members are on the site.

So until the dating tree is shaken and those remaining clean up their acts and there are only two or three major sites, then online dating is like Johnny Applessed spreading apple seeds in hopes something will grown.

So this huge number of sites means a limited amout of members and there may be so few members that even in a major city like Dallas, there may only be a couple of members. And the site wants the usual money a large site like match wants.

Personally, I think online dating is now more socially aceptable than ever but it is also like hoping to meet someone in a bar. It might happen but you will probably hook up with someone that is damaged goods in some way or not very attractive (and I do not mean super model attractive-just an all American Girl next door type).

But I had some great meories of the golden age of personals as i call it . And sometimes I have to pull out my photo albums just to prove the women existed and all the places I went with women that I met via the print personals.

In a lot of ways, I am gald that I am nearly too old to care about dating much longer. When I hit my 60's in less than 9 years, I doubt i will find many women attractive at that age. And most will have a take it or leave it attitude concerning dating since most people will be set in their ways and not that intersted in dating. Maybe friendship will be the thing at that age But without the benefits.

I agree, there are too many dating sites (as well as too many people abusing the system). Strange you should mention the printed personals, because the few times I've had any luck, it's been through them. I myself have just finished writing my 1st novel and am turning 40 on August 15, 2007, so I thought I'd try something new and attention-getting---I stood out on the corner of Sunset Boulevard and Rodeo Drive with a homemade sign, and believe it or not, three different women drove up and asked to meet me! I'm not kidding, I actually did this. It was a lot of fun, and it proved that if you want to meet women who have plenty of guts, showmanship does the job! ;-) Anyhow, I wish you the best of luck, bro.

I love LA and I can visualize you doing this .

But maybe it would happen only in LA. or some other laid back city.

I think in Dallas where I live, they would think of you as the same kind of person who whas a 'work for food' sign and ignore you. Or run you down.

But the sign is a great idea. Too bad that the dating sites are so bad that we have to resort to thinking outside the box just to get a date.

I hope it worked out for you.

If you get the chance, post back and let us know how it worked out for you

Well, Firebird, I can tell you one thing for sure... in the 3 hours I stood holding that dumb sign on Sunset Boulevard, I got more results than from all the time I've wasted messing with dating services. BTW if any dating service people ever read this post, then GOOD... hopefully they will clean up their act.

Hi Marty,

FIRST : A late Happy Birthday!!!!!!!! II hope one of those women gave you a nice birthday.



One thing if you get the chance to reply.

WHAT DID THE SIGN SAY?

And good luck on your book.

If I was a better writer, I would write one called 'Confessions of a Personals Dater. Having used the Personal ads for 20 plus years and had good luck until everything went on the internet and then it became a bunch of crap as far as getting a date. But lots of compaines are making big bucks and none want to clean up their act. But do I have stories to tell.

All the luck in the world

firebird

My sign said "Ladies... Looking for a Nice Guy? Ask Me!"

BTW my book is science fiction and is not a romance story... although its main character is a lovely young blonde woman with big brown eyes, who helps ETs conquer the Earth by advising them to wreck the global economy. Interesting reading, for people who do not think Darth Vader is a great guy.