Subject: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2010/10/24 12:48am
By: Anonymous

Well, this is my first post on here and I wanted to share my online dating experiences for the past 5 years. I have to say I have had it with online dating sites. I've tried every dating site I could find and I've come to the conclusion that they are all spammed. I've never been on a date using them nor communicated with any real person. All communications I've had have asked either for money, they aren't who they say they are or they completely ignore me like I'm non existent.

I've been single all my life and I've tried meeting girls in person. That didn't work so I tried online dating. That didn't work either. I don't know what else to do except to warn everyone about the dating site out on the net. I'm a very attractive guy. There's nothing wrong with me but I fear in today's world, women who are single aren't looking for a relationship anymore because they fear the guy will date them just for the sex and/or will treat them badly. Why do you think there are so many single women with kids out there these days? Especially on these dating sites.

Well, that how I feel. Frustrated, that I will never find the girl of my dreams.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2010/11/27 11:46am
By: Anonymous

Amen brother. The fact is that attractive (or even passable) girls don't need the Internet to find love -- they have it clawing at their doorstep everywhere they go. Chicks who actually use these sites are either really crazy or looking for attention (usually when they're coming off from a relationship or their boyfriend left them). The whole thing is a total waste of time.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/01/03 08:52pm
By: Anonymous

As a woman who has used online dating I found myself curious about both of your reactions to dating. I'm sorry you haven't found quality women. However your statement makes me wonder about the assumptions you're making about women (good-looking or otherwise). Anon said,
The fact is that attractive (or even passable) girls don't need the Internet to find love -- they have it clawing at their doorstep everywhere they go. Chicks who actually use these sites are either really crazy or looking for attention (usually when they're coming off from a relationship or their boyfriend left them)
Well, I'm an educated, attractive and financially secure woman living in a relatively rural area. Thanks to online dating, I've been on a dozen dates in the last year few months. And I have the double whammy that you would think would scare away all men...I'm twice divorced and a single mom of teenagers. However, I've met many really nice guys. A few have resulted in date #2 or #3 but didn't go much further. But I don't blame the online dating service, nor do I write these men off in anyway. These were great guys but we just didn't have chemistry. Yes, it would be ideal to have met them while on a hike, at the gym or at a political debate, but realistically...the likelihood of that happening isn't great.

With regards to your statements about women who date online as being crazy....well, there are crazy people everywhere. Well, that can go both ways. I've seen my share of oddballs on dating sites but it doesn't take much to weed them out. I mean, anyone who advertises themselves as attractive, fit, full of sexual energy, a smoker and drinker searching for a women who is 20 years younger, fit, attractive, no kids, financially secure, sexually adventurous and who keeps a clean house...well, that guy is not going to get many responses. And then there are the dudes that send out random emails to large number of people without reading the profiles. It's easy enough to figure it out by the way the email reads. My point is that it takes some diligence to screen people. I screen the site pretty carefully and email a bit with potential dates before I agree to meet a guy which is how I've managed to weed out the oddballs, but that's been few and far between anyway. I've never had any problems.

Also your statement that good-looking women have men clawing at their doorstep....well, that's not true either. It's not true because we are busy professional women...and yes, some of us are mothers as well...who might not want to date in our own profession nor sit around in bars.

Patrick spoke about getting nothing but spam. I've never experienced spamming, unless you're talking about the dudes that just send out emails to everyone without actually reading your profile. But that's easy enough to figure out by the text of their email and voila....I just block them.

Again, I'm sorry neither of you haven't had a positive experience with online dating. I'm wondering if you're expecting too much from it. If you go into a bar and meet a women, have a great conversation and nothing comes of it, you don't stop going in that bar, right? My suggestion? Email a few women (even if they aren't Ms. Perfect). Meet them for coffee. What's the worst that can happen? You meet an interesting person and have to suffer the discomfort of sending a polite "nice to meet you, best of luck" dear John email? So what? Take a chance and stop blaming the sites for your dating woes!

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/01/04 01:21pm
By: Anonymous

Well I hate to break it to you vtdater but you misunderstood. I'm not talking just about quality women. I was sending out emails all the time to many different women and they all turned out to be spam. When I didn't send out email and just waited for a response from someone I didn't get any.

I don't go out to bars because I don't enjoy the bar scene considering I don't drink and I don't like the smell of smoke. I do go out with my friends and every time I happen to run across a female they don't seem interested. I'm a down to Earth nice guy. I'm not a freak. I'm just your average guy.

I'm happy to hear you aren't having any problems on dating sites. I have nothing but problems on all of them.
Sorry vtdater. I have to disagree with you on this one.


Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/01/04 11:08pm
By: Anonymous

Hey Patrick,
I feel your pain but I'm on the female side of the fence.
And I just got scammed by not only attempted by the respondents who contacted me but the site (BE2) I signed up with.
I'm not overly happy with online dating right now either but I do have to agree with the last female who reponded.
Don't give up. In my last foray into online dating I met several great guys one of whom I am still friends with despite the fact he is married now with two children.
I have been divorced 13 years now and have not had much luck anyway either online, meeting through friends and family or random meetings.
I am not sure what it is.
Maybe as humans wer are all too gaurded and afraid to take risks.
All I know is that I wish a great-sounding guy like you would strike upo a conversation and ask me for coffee. i am still old-fashioned I guess and am waiting for the guy to make the first move.
Please don't give up, try a reputable site like Christian Cafe and be careful with your personal information until you are sure the person is legit.
We are out there and you can find someone, just keep trying.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/01/05 10:08pm
By: Anonymous

Quote by: Brenda

Hey Patrick,
I feel your pain but I'm on the female side of the fence.
And I just got scammed by not only attempted by the respondents who contacted me but the site (BE2) I signed up with.
I'm not overly happy with online dating right now either but I do have to agree with the last female who reponded.
Don't give up. In my last foray into online dating I met several great guys one of whom I am still friends with despite the fact he is married now with two children.
I have been divorced 13 years now and have not had much luck anyway either online, meeting through friends and family or random meetings.
I am not sure what it is.
Maybe as humans wer are all too gaurded and afraid to take risks.
All I know is that I wish a great-sounding guy like you would strike upo a conversation and ask me for coffee. i am still old-fashioned I guess and am waiting for the guy to make the first move.
Please don't give up, try a reputable site like Christian Cafe and be careful with your personal information until you are sure the person is legit.
We are out there and you can find someone, just keep trying.


DO GIVE UP AND GO TO ASIAN MASSAGE PARLORS

It is cheaper and less drama than dating.

after 7 years of wasting my dinte using on line dating, i went back to the hookers and have never been more at peace.

As for the stuck up women, let them watch TV like i did for nearly a decade

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/04/25 10:37pm
By: Anonymous

It seems to me like the majority of the women on these sites are really looking for a Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise. The rest, likes and dislikes, don't really seem to matter. I found two perfectly matched women on Ok Cupid and wrote a unique two paragraph email to each of them. Neither one of them bothered to write me back. I couldn't believe my eyes! Geek I thought I had found the perfect match but it turned out to probably be a fake profile for all I know.

*sigh*

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/05/04 02:47am
By: Anonymous

I'm right there with you in the same boat man. Between my time on okcupid and plentyoffish I've probably sent out about 50 very thoughtful, poilte messages to women I shared things in common with. I've heard back from 3. I'm an average looking guy, extremely nice, and I'm even in a pretty successful local rock band. Still can't get any attention. I eventually exchanged numbers with those 3, and it's hard getting them to text me at all anymore. They talk to me like crazy one day, ignore me for the next week or two. They tell me to call them, and then never answer or call back.

I don't understand the points the two female posters were trying to make. I'm sure they have had some good dates from online sites. It would be fairly simple to do so when you have 20 new messages waiting for you every time you log in. From there you just pick and choose who you want to talk to. Easy.

Truth be told, the online dating scene is so over-saturated with guys it's insane. We are a dime a dozen. They're probably not fake profiles sorry to say, they just have tons of other guys (probably better looking) messaging them so why talk to you or me?

That being said, two-paragraph first messages might be a bit long. The most succesful template according to the forums is a brief, 3-5 sentence message that ends with a question. So spend a little bit talking about something you have in common, and then end with a question that goes into more detail about that same topic, or maybe ask them something they didn't mention in their profile. Something that's easy for them to respond to. Don't tell them they're pretty unless you just have to, they hear it all the time and will just write you off as being the same as all the other guys. Once you've written the perfect message, hit send and pray. Don't expect anything back though. Just keep pumping out good, personalized messages and you will eventually get lucky. Oh, and try to hit the ones that are currently online, especially on okcupid. Has a higher likelihood of actually being read that way. Good luck.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/05/06 11:05am
By: Anonymous

They are all bad now. I have been using them on and off for about 10 years. I use them as a supplement to meeting someone while out. You can't solely rely on them. But, with that said it honestly has gotten worse. It’s a fad that has had its time. And I'll just say it, there is a reason why the single never been married women are on there! The best dates I have ever had are from divorced women. They get it at least. Nothing serious has ever come from an online dating site. Only the ones met in out in the real world. Most of the women I know who are fun to be around and have a good time would never use the sites. So that should tell you something. As, your female friends who you enjoy hanging out with if they would ever be on a dating site. That will tell you something too.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/05/08 10:51am
By: Anonymous

Quote by: Patrick

Well, this is my first post on here and I wanted to share my online dating experiences for the past 5 years. I have to say I have had it with online dating sites. I've tried every dating site I could find and I've come to the conclusion that they are all spammed. I've never been on a date using them nor communicated with any real person. All communications I've had have asked either for money, they aren't who they say they are or they completely ignore me like I'm non existent.

I've been single all my life and I've tried meeting girls in person. That didn't work so I tried online dating. That didn't work either. I don't know what else to do except to warn everyone about the dating site out on the net. I'm a very attractive guy. There's nothing wrong with me but I fear in today's world, women who are single aren't looking for a relationship anymore because they fear the guy will date them just for the sex and/or will treat them badly. Why do you think there are so many single women with kids out there these days? Especially on these dating sites.

Well, that how I feel. Frustrated, that I will never find the girl of my dreams.




PATRICK.. FIRST TIME ON A SITE THAT I THOUGHT I WOULD BE MARRIED BUT HE WAS ALSO A SCAM. HE IS SO WHATEVER!
wE ARE I THINK ON THE SAME PAGE..

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/05/14 09:01am
By: Anonymous

I just wanted to put in my experience about attractive women having men scratching at the door. There is an old saying the prettier you are the lonelier you are, it's true.

I'm a very attractive 25 yr old, with no drama, no kids, I have gone to bars but men never approach me. So I turned to online. Maybe it's just the New England men, that act like they are still in high school.

I'm beginning to curse the way I look if it means I will always be single.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/05/16 03:56pm
By: Anonymous

You know fellas, if the women aren't responding to you, you might be contacting women out of your league or you have selected lamo pictures and your profile advertizes you as super boring.

Do some research on how to make a good profile

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/06/29 11:37pm
By: S.Dave

I can sympathy in some aspect you had mentioned. I could not find any girl in the real life or the fact that I did not have enough confidence to talk or go further with someone. I also tried to go online and find some gals. From thousand of nicknames on the internet, I feel easy going with 2-3 gals but it still did not go to something seriously. In some aspects, I think that online dating is kinda interesting but we should do depend too much on it because it is somehow fake.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/08/30 09:58am
By: Anonymous

I have been on many dating site's, subscriber sites and free ones. Now what I found out about the Subscriber site's shocked me, what they do is send you matches only while your not paid up and as soon as you top up your account with them the emails stop and the response is almost zero. I have been on many of the Free ones and they are not much different except that there are a lot more Yahoo Yahoo boys and Sweetheart Scammers on them. Ok Cupid, Cupid Bay, Edate, Frendorama these were just full of scammers mostly from West Africa, I reported so many that I just gave up on those Sites. These sites are all Pay sites and some have been Reported for Posting Fake Profile to con the males into paying up again and the worst are, Match.com, Match finder, Lavalife and RSVP, All these have made headlines and been before the Courts.
Many of the Dating sites ans specially the Pay ones are connected to others and often sell your information onto other Dating Sites then create a Profile without you knowing until you receive an Email from someone wanting to meet you. Its happen to me several times and I had to report them to Australian Federal Police and ACCC for breach of Privacy, it took a few goes to have my Profile removed.
I have noticed that some of the sites have been taken over by another Site and changed names. I have never really had any success from Dating Sites but I still have a Profile on some which are completely free, no point in paying to be sent fake Profiles like Match.com do.
One site which I will mention which is not a Dating Site as such but MyDailyFlog was originally Clicker Eye, it then became Refriendz and now MyDailyFlog. This site is full of Pedophiles, Scammers, Fake Profiles and plain Criminals, probably the worst site I have ever had anything to do with. I went thru the total list of Australian women from 18 to 55 and there were a total of 63, out of that 33 were Positive Fakes and Scammers of which most People had already worked out and of the remaining 30 12 were consider to be suspect and I could not verify if they were Genuine or Fake but there was something about there Profile that lead me to believe they weren't genuine and I would guess they were from West Africa Pretending to be in Australia. That is one site I would not miss if AFP, FBI or CIA shut them down but I'm guessing they are using it to trap the Pedophiles

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2011/10/15 06:24pm
By: Anonymous

ok lets start with the basics DO NOT i repeat do not write paragraphs in a message for an initial response remember the band KISS keep it simple stupid 2 letters hi thats all you need to initiate contact secondly don't talk about yourself ask her questions about her and listen to what she says then if you here something she has in common with you tell her but not too much you guys just need to calm down and be cool about it and you will get results another thing ask 100 girls out in real life and on the net i dont care if you see her at walgreens expect a no embrace the no and yes will come to you

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2018/07/13 10:50pm
By: Anonymous

I have tried several dating sites over the course of 5 years. During that time, I met about a dozen or so men (I was selective, or so I thought). Most of them had yet to get over their former partner/ girlfriend.....Many of these men claimed they had moved on, but it as I got to know them better it became apparent they were still processing their break up....which made it difficult to impossible to develop our relationship....One man posed as divorced when he was still living with his wife! I think most of the men I dated (or tried to date) WANTED to be over their X, and felt as if another woman would be the best solution. The other problem I encountered was that many men on the dating sites had been in MULTIPLE marriages/ relationships looking for Ms. Right / Ms. Perfect. What was the common denominator? HUH? LOL. Most men I have known rarely seek counseling nor take the time to read a book to address the issues that may have led to their divorce / split up. Dating a Christian man was a priority for me......However, when I got to know these Christian men better, many (not all) talked the talk, but did not walk the walk, not even close! SO, after 5 plus years of making a serious effort to search for a compatible mate, I have decided that if I meet a man, it will have to be out in the world as I live my life to the fullest sharing God's love with all I encounter.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2018/07/18 08:43am
By: Anonymous

Quote by: Anonymous

I have tried several dating sites over the course of 5 years. During that time, I met about a dozen or so men (I was selective, or so I thought). Most of them had yet to get over their former partner/ girlfriend.....Many of these men claimed they had moved on, but it as I got to know them better it became apparent they were still processing their break up....which made it difficult to impossible to develop our relationship....One man posed as divorced when he was still living with his wife! I think most of the men I dated (or tried to date) WANTED to be over their X, and felt as if another woman would be the best solution. The other problem I encountered was that many men on the dating sites had been in MULTIPLE marriages/ relationships looking for Ms. Right / Ms. Perfect. What was the common denominator? HUH? LOL. Most men I have known rarely seek counseling nor take the time to read a book to address the issues that may have led to their divorce / split up. Dating a Christian man was a priority for me......However, when I got to know these Christian men better, many (not all) talked the talk, but did not walk the walk, not even close! SO, after 5 plus years of making a serious effort to search for a compatible mate, I have decided that if I meet a man, it will have to be out in the world as I live my life to the fullest sharing God's love with all I encounter.



As an experiment i set up two profiles with the exact same info with one small difference. One was a male model and one was me. Im in good shape and look very similar to the model except he is 6'1" and i am 5'10".

The difference shows how shallow and superficial women really are. Almost 80/20. And in many cases model guy was rude and i was polite and still model guy got more hits.

So yes i agree dating sites are extremely sexist and the fact that now sites like Bumble give an even greater advantage its almost pointless as youre not looking for depth of character, but some non existant romance novel to make up for your past mistakes...not ours.

Re: Fed Up With All Dating Sites

Posted on: 2018/08/10 06:10am
By: Anonymous

Hey guys, I get it. It’s a pain in the ass to figure out what these women want to hear. Half of them say they want all this romance and other bs but in reality the as#@ole is the one they go home with at the end of the night. Remember Less is more!! I use to try to put all this effort into what it said and talk to them for a while to try to get to know them before asking them out. THAT IS THE WRONG PLAY!!

I am on tinder now and there are a couple scams on their but like 90% of the women are real and most of the time I just say hi or hey how are you... how was your day or week. Not more than a short scentance if that to initiate the conversation. Think about it, if you got all those emails are you going to sit there and read through a two paragraph one and if you did would you have the time to go through several. Point is short and sweet fellas say hi how are you, see if they respond. If they do then you know they have an interest in you. After that maybe one or two more messages each time waiting for a response. Then ask them for their number and ask them to happy hr. Forget coffee!! You have a lot better chances if some drinks are flowing. Also when you do get their number DO NOT CALL OR TXT MORE THAN ONCE AFTER THE FIRST DATE. OR EVEN WAIT A DAY OR TWO AFTER. you want them to be thinking about what you are doing Are you going to call etc. once you consistently call them and txt them and always quickly reply back they lose interest very quickly. I hate to say it but nice guys finish last. Most girls like guys that are a bit mysterious or keep them questioning. If you txt them first and have a little convo make sure they are the last to txt. Never seem desperate or too quick to respond because they will stop thinking about you immediately.

Good luck out there guys.

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