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Survey Finds Singles Prefer Great Conversation To Great Sex

Communication
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Elvis sang, “A little less conversation, a little more action please.” But according to a recent survey from Plenty of Fish, today’s singles are looking for exactly the opposite.

Conversation Nation, the largest study ever conducted on the subject, asked more than 2,000 singles across the United States to weigh in on the importance of conversation in the search for love. Sixty-five percent called conversation a lost art, yet a whopping 90 percent of singles surveyed said they would rather talk all night on a first date than have sex all night.

An increased dependency on social media and digital devices has changed the dating landscape forever. Now, instead of locking eyes from across the room and timidly saying “Hi,” many singles are starting relationships by swiping right and sending strings of emojis. Sixty-one percent of singles believe the rise in technology usage has impacted our ability to have meaningful, face-to-face conversations.

Despite that discontent with the quality of modern communication, singles still rely heavily on conversation to connect. Nine out of 10 respondents identified a good conversation as the gold standard for a great date, while only one in 10 gave sex that coveted position.

The study also found that conversation has a significant impact on attraction. Eighty-seven percent of singles have found someone more attractive after a conversation. The top reasons they gave for people looking better post-chat were:

  1. Intelligence (42%)
  2. Sexy voice (40%)
  3. Sense of humor (34%)

Nearly the same amount (85%) reported finding someone less attractive after a conversation. Their dates lost points post-chat for:

  1. Having nothing in common (61%)
  2. Coming across as insensitive or mean (58%)
  3. Having misaligned values (57%)

While almost all singles agree that small talk is important and good conversations leave them feeling positive, singles in different age groups have significantly different approaches to communication.

Eighty-seven percent of Gen Z respondents said they prefer face-to-face conversation with someone they’re interested in dating, however, 62 percent reported getting too nervous. Only 32 percent of Gen X and 26 percent of Boomers felt the same way. Of all the generations, Gen Z proved most reluctant to break the ice.

The generations were also divided on what constitutes a conversation. The majority of singles agree that a phone call counts, but they were divided on more modern forms of communication:

  • Texting: Only 54 percent of singles say it constitutes a conversation, particularly among Millennials (67%) and Gen Z (76%). Only one in four Boomers think texting qualifies as a conversation.
  • Chat Apps: 87 percent of Boomers don’t consider chat apps a conversation. A majority of Gen Z (54%) and 47 percent of Millennials disagree with the Boomer mindset. Interestingly, Boomers are significantly more likely than other generations to communicate by email, while Gen X, Millennials, and Gen Z prefer texting.

As for sex, 50 percent of singles said they’d rather have a great conversation with their crush all night. Twenty-five percent chose a romp between the sheets, and another 25 percent said they’d take a good night’s sleep over anything else. At 41 percent, Boomers were the generation most likely to prioritise their beauty rest.